Posts by LoriJis

i dont know if we'll be ready for all of the shunning that will occur, but i want to be there and so does he.. the funny thing is we never received an invitation or anything to let us know about the wedding.

LoriJis

This is Ironhill's wife. You know what gets me even more. We paid for a cake we diidnt even see a pic of. They went and put it under our name and told us how much and where to go. If it weren't for the lady when we went to pay showing us a pic, we would have no idea. And BTW no they didnt save us a piece.

Also, my husband mentioned the girls getting invted. Tell me this isn't f&*%d up. They invite my husband's ex-wife to the reception who was just reinstared 2 days before. Man that is some crazy sh%^.

We went to the ceremony and my mother in law looked away when we got there and then at the end we went to congratulate his brother and his new wife and he thanked us for coming - after making us sit in the front with her side of the family like a display - but his new wife turned away when we went to congratulate her. We were trying to be nice.

It amazes me how people can be. Side note, we got married at the hall before dissassociating and the elder who married us was there and didnt even look at us - and adding insult to injury it was my husband's best friend for over 15 years.

Yea - i wanna go back to that......HELL NO

18

Who do you consider as a friend ??

by troubled mind in

jw
friends

when we were witnesses every other witness was our "friend" ,but more often than not they were just aquantinces involved in the same religion as we were .

at the time i felt i would have given my life for others in my hall .

i tried very hard to be a good friend to others by showing personal interest in their lives and offering encouragement or help when they needed it ,but i never really felt a real connection with most .. i always wanted to have a friend and be the type of friend that could just stop by to shoot the breeze at anytime and feel welcome .

LoriJis

i know exactly how you feel. I had a lot of "friends" in the org. I was Ms. Popularity. We hung out and i was a good friend to all of them. I was there when they needed me. And i thought some of them were my real friends because of the length of time 10-20 yrs and the stuff we had gone through. I've always been the type to need friends in my life. But the reality is - like you said - their friendship is based on your status in the org. When my "friends" found out i was disassociated their friendships ended. All of them. I even received hate messages from the ones i thought were real friends. People i wouldve given anything for and at one point did - when i needed them the most they all left. Friendships in the org is conditional and so are family relations - I'm seeing that now.

A real friend is someone you can be honest with and despite differences in opinions will still see you for YOU. Will be there in the good and bad. Will support you and treat you the way you do them. Finding those friends is VERY HARD but they are out there.

You will find them and see the difference. I hope to soon have friends again....this time REAL FRIENDS.

138

What year Did you Stop Attending Meetings - How Long were you a JW ?

by flipper in

jw
friends

i'm trying to compare some statistics and figures on this to share later in the thread to see if more long-time witnesses are exiting- or are newer witnesses exiting after a shorter period of time.

and - are more people exiting in the last 10 to 15 years than before.

so your answers would be helpful in looking into this .

LoriJis

I was raised in the organization. I stopped going 6 months ago and dissassociated myself "officially" last week.

7

I have repented of my sins and decided to return to the loving embrace of the JW's!

by highdose in

jw
friends

hahhahaha!

gotcha!

april fools!.

LoriJis

that was a good one

17

Friendship with the opposite sex

by LoriJis in

jw
friends

i have to ask a personal questions.

do you think it is ok to have a friendship with someone of the opposite sex if you are in a serious relationship or married?

nothing intimate just friendship.

LoriJis

Thank you for all your comments. I also believe it is ok to be friends with the opposite sex as long as you are open about it with your spouse and know where the boundaries are. Obviously too much personal time alone can lead to something but if the relationship is just friendship...i see no problem. I know people who their best of friends whom they confide in is from the opposite sex and there have been not been any problems. I think as long as ur dont hide and keep it open.

But ironhill does bring out a good point....what if your spouse or partner has a problem with you having friends of the opposite sex. Do you give in whether you agree with it or not? Or do you continue to maintain these friendships?

17

Friendship with the opposite sex

by LoriJis in

jw
friends

i have to ask a personal questions.

do you think it is ok to have a friendship with someone of the opposite sex if you are in a serious relationship or married?

nothing intimate just friendship.

LoriJis

I have to ask a personal questions. Do you think it is ok to have a friendship with someone of the opposite sex if you are in a serious relationship or married? Nothing intimate just friendship. Just need other people's opinion.

thanks

61

What Do You Value in your Life Now that you Exited the Witnesses ?

by flipper in

jw
friends

i was talking with a friend of mine on the board yesterday and the discussion gave me the idea for this thread !

( thanks friend !

) and it seems as we were talking the thought came up that many of us when exiting the mind control of jehovah's witnesses we really come to appreciate the freedom to think how we want and be able to have access to other views which helps us to have a broader scope , or broader world view than just the tunnel vision of the wt society.

LoriJis

I enjoy starting to learn who I am. Also see time in a different aspect. Have time to do things I once enjoyed and could due to service and meetings. Having time to sleep in on weekends, spend qualilty time with my husband and kids. Having time to see what I REALLY want to do. I am enjoying being able to do what i want and not feel guilty. Seeing people for who they are. And yes, I do not miss wearing the long skirts....i dress how i want.

14

Amazes me how elders act.....

by LoriJis in

jw
friends

most of you know that my husband (iron hill) and i have been trying to do the fade from the witnesses....here's the update!

my husband's ex wife who is disfellowshipped decides all of a sudden that she wants to get reinstated - i guess cuz we decided not to go anymore - and the guilt of their daughters dying in armageddon is killing her.

but anyway, she asked us if we would be ok with her coming and taking the girls to the meetings on the weekends that are ours.....my husband denied.

LoriJis

The Old Hippie

No they have not tried to contact us. Not by phone, letter or any other means. Even my inlaws live in the same apt complex we do and not even through them - not that they should go through them - but if they wanted to contact us they have ways and we didnt receive anything.

I guess we will never know....

LoriJis