In my mind, all human beings are insecure to some degree. But loneliness mixed with extreme insecurity (lack of confidence) can equal desperation. And as Ive seen - desperate people do desperate things! Granted adding in the JW aspect of things makes navigating the opposite sex 10x harder, but not impossible. Men and women who are confident usually can FEEL when the opposite sex is/not interested. Even moreso when someone is as I said, insecure, lonely, and desperate. Because Ive personally never had any issues getting attention, being asked out, or dating... some people DO feel that makes me a 'non factor' when trying to give advice. And I get how they may see it that way. But my looks nor my social success has never chipped away at my character - ever. I work very hard to try to be as humble as I can - one thing I do retain from my JW days!
babygirl30
JoinedPosts by babygirl30
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84
Girls are unpredictable, materialist, and use us, men, as a toy - Part 2
by will-be-apostate inwell here am i, a couple of years passed since my original post (link here), somewhat less mysoginistic, more open to relationships, heartbroken again.
this is an official "fuck my life" thread.. being chased by the elders makes one arrive at the conclusion that there is nothing better than not being chased by the elders.
i had a pre-jc meeting a week ago.
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84
Girls are unpredictable, materialist, and use us, men, as a toy - Part 2
by will-be-apostate inwell here am i, a couple of years passed since my original post (link here), somewhat less mysoginistic, more open to relationships, heartbroken again.
this is an official "fuck my life" thread.. being chased by the elders makes one arrive at the conclusion that there is nothing better than not being chased by the elders.
i had a pre-jc meeting a week ago.
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babygirl30
How much experience have you had with girls? Do you have female 'friends' that you can learn from - ask questions about girls, reading them, dating, hookups?
I cant say that I was always confident..I wasnt! But I was athletic and had a ton of male friends. They (without wven knowing it sometimes) taught me how to relate to the opposite sex. Growing up JW it was impossible to navigate dating. In the world though, it was so easy...I mean, took no effort. But I realize that is MY experience and not everyone will have the same experiences as myself. But underneath it all - everyone wants to be loved and to give love...remember that. Their timing for love may not be the same as yours, but that desire is there.
Just be cautious of saying things like "girls are xyz..." basically lumping them all into the same negative group. People can and will take that exactly how it is written - not how you may have intended. Im not those girls who hurt you. Unless it was someone on this site that you hooked up with, then none of the women on this site were the ones that hurt you. But comments like tou made hurt US...
Lastly...body language is HUGE. Social queues are how humans interact and communicate - with and without words. Read up on that stuff. Maybe you miss signs or werent aware of them, when it comes to girls. And believe me...women can SNIFF out insecurity and a man who is desperate. Not saying YOU are, but a man who falls too fast is almost a red flag for a female...
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help me think like an elder
by Homer notsimpson inok guys, i have been tasked to ask for your opinions regarding this case.. and be honest.
my brother sexted a girl a little over a year ago, they never dated, and she got mad at him.... she got engaged and the engagement ended in august.. she attempted suicide, then talked to the elders an told him she was gonna tell on him too, now that was in august, the sister told my brother that since she didn't know his hall they couldn't do anything.. we found that doesn't seem right, so hes been freaking out, but ita now two days away from 2017 and the elders haven't speaked to him yet.. why could that be?
could they give him all this time to confess?
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babygirl30
OMG...JWs continue to surprise me with their naivete!
...Lesson 1 - never sext someone who you arent 'established' with (aka - dating, sleeping with, married to).
...Lesson 2 - JWs are ruled by a guilty conscience over their libidos. So, with that said, DO NOT trust em not to show your pics/confess and drop your name.
Tell your friend not to sweat it! As has been said, deny it all. Lol!! If he hasnt head from the elders by now, even if homegirl has a screenshot of the convo/d*ck pic, I doubt they will. 😋
Half of the elders prob do the same crsp themselved...hahahaha
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84
Girls are unpredictable, materialist, and use us, men, as a toy - Part 2
by will-be-apostate inwell here am i, a couple of years passed since my original post (link here), somewhat less mysoginistic, more open to relationships, heartbroken again.
this is an official "fuck my life" thread.. being chased by the elders makes one arrive at the conclusion that there is nothing better than not being chased by the elders.
i had a pre-jc meeting a week ago.
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babygirl30
I hope this is not offensive, and I am going to break down why Im asking this in a minute, but - are you autistic or do you suffer from aspergers?
Now the breakdown of why I ask that...
1. Very articulate of your feats (make a lot of money at 22)...the meeting of this girl at the party...the play by play of the hookup.
2. Mentioned you fall in love almost immediately (which typically is someone that has social or emotional issues and cannot 'read' social queues/peoples intentions). People that desperately long for or search for 'love' and attention tend to JUMP into things without thought or considering the consequences. They jusy want to feel GOOD and have someone give a damn about them...
3. The fact that you label girls as cruel, users, and play men like toys (refer to #2 -demonizing ALL females as users because you misread the signs from 1 or 2 of them that you have come in contact with intimately). I believe you said you had never had a gf before?
4. Obsess on a topic/person (you said you re-analyzed the situation over and over, you questioned how she can fall in love with you and then cut you off). I mean, you made an entire post here on misunderstanding a one night stand! Hookups are just that - you drink, you say dumb stuff, and you have sex. If the hookup is good, you stay in contact. If the hookup is not to your liking, you typically 'ghost' that person.
Im sorry you got your feelings hurt. Dating these days can be a maze to everyone...and it is frustrating. People day things to get what they want, mean things, and lies. It comes down ti following your gutt. But your description of the interactions you've had with females just kinda screams social issues. I may be wrong, and if so I apologize. I dated a man who had aspergers (didnt know till the end of our relationship) and his ideas of dating are like yours: he felt ALL women were liars and cheaters. He was uncomfortable in social settings and had a hard time reading people - their faces, their intentions, their actions, their words (jokes and one liners always went over his head). He fell in love almost immediately (told me he loved me in less than 2 wks of us dating/becoming intimate). When we broke up after only 6 mos, he obsessed over me and our breakup, despite me asking him NOT to contact me - he kept trying to (I had to block him). And I can bet to this day, he still blamed ME and all other females for hurting him, using him, being cheaters and liers. 😧
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Does anyone have any fashion sense? Getting Married. Help?
by RavenPearl ini am a man and i have roughly 10 months to prepare for my wedding (including raising the funds etc... my fiance is caught up in her affairs associated with the wedding.
now i do have a pretty good sense of fashion when it comes to 'dress to impress' when required.
however, i'm not familiar with specific clothing lines.
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babygirl30
I myself am getting married in 9 months, and I would be DAMNED if my fiance did not 'run' his fashion ideas by ME first...lol! Not that I would pick out his outfit, but I sure as Hell am not about to be embarrassed by a lack of fashion sense. So please - talk to your fiance!
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babygirl30
I agree...most of the elders I knew were uneducated, menial laborers, and barely able to support a family. Yet they GUNNED for that elder position, and lorded it over people as if they were all VPs of a corp. Sadly...these men were Gods in the Khall (and their own minds), but were total losers outside those Khall doors! I mean, nobody respected them, they were jokes.
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JW and the Sabbath
by Andromeda inhello brothers and sisters and truth seekers,.
i am an active jehovah's witness.
i don't believe in 1914 and i'm tototally against their way of dealing with abuse cases.
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babygirl30
This whole conv sounds very JWish! LOL. Someone lays out all their ideas on a topic about a doctrine, they claim to have 'authority' to know the background of said doctrine, and once their expertise/authority is QUESTIONED - they immediately get defensive, yet never provide any proof or specifics of their 'authority', and then finally sum the whole conversation by calling the questioner childish or stupid - and lastly demand to be 'left alone'.
Just another example of typical Jw mentality...start a fire, build it up to an inferno, then plead the 5th when fingers are pointed at you for starting the whole thing. 😁😁😁
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I have to vent about someone...
by babygirl30 ini'm sorry if this comes across as rude or mean, but i'm sorry - not sorry!
there is a woman that was in my congregation for years.
she was dating a 'worldly' man at the time and ended up df'd.
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babygirl30
XELDER - she needs to worry about her OWN security before she comes for mine. How and why be concerned with me and my life?
WORLDLING9 - you got that right! Dazed and confused...she needs to get it together and figure out. But in the meantime, stop writing such contradictions.
FREDDO - when she first reached out, I did in fact give her specific reasons why I had no interest in going back, all of which were doctrine (not personal): blood doctrine, abuse dealings, df process not biblically based, choice of elders, 144k keep growing, baptizing kids, JW broadcast (tv evangelizing). It was all short and sweet. But her last response came a week after I did that, so it is obvious nothing said 'stuck'.
STEVE2 - that is my thing. When ex JWs reach out to me, I try to be careful NOT to lead them in any direction. Ya know? I encourage them to do their research, talk to others, and follow their hearts. Cause that is what I did! But for this chick to be browbeating me, despite her being in the JW doghouse for the 2nd time, is retarded. Thats why the 2nd time, I had no quams checking her.
STUCKINARUT2 - lol! Im not even mad at that sister...she has balls! 3 men AND brought em all to the hall? Shoot. I never understood that mentality. If you want to 'do you' then go right ahead, but make sure you are not living in a glass house. Dont come for me...
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7
I have to vent about someone...
by babygirl30 ini'm sorry if this comes across as rude or mean, but i'm sorry - not sorry!
there is a woman that was in my congregation for years.
she was dating a 'worldly' man at the time and ended up df'd.
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babygirl30
I'm sorry if this comes across as rude or mean, but I'm sorry - NOT sorry! :-)
There is a woman that was in my congregation for years. She was dating a 'worldly' man at the time and ended up DF'd. She married him, got pregnant, and reinstated - and all was well I guess. She would aux pioneer here and there, she got her husband to study, and he would come to meetings here and there. But for the most part, he kept his distance from all things JW except gatherings - cause he was ALWAYS at those! -hahaha. Now over the years, my situation changed I was DF'd, and have not been back since. AT that point, she unfriended me on facebook, which I expected and had no issue with. It's not like we were all that close anyhow.
9yrs have passed, and I get a random friend request from her - which I accept. I typically assume that when people from my old congregation request me, it's just to see if I am back/reinstated. But I am sure by my pics, language, and posted topics, they can clearly see I am not and will eventually unfriend me anyhow. Matter-a-fact, an ex of mine (JW guy) friended me, went through ALL my pics, must've noticed I am NOT a JW anymore but am happy despite (this guy was a controlling jerk-off), and unfriended me not too long afterwards. Anyways, back to this woman. She sends me this DM:
Mind you, I responded, and that leads to a conversation...where she OPENLY admits that she does NOT agree with the JW's...
...but after her last statement above, she FLIPS the convo around, and begins witnessing to ME!!! Trying to convince me to come back. I was nice about it, but firmly explained my reasoning behind not wanting to go back and my lack of interest in returning. Now you would think that someone saying no would be enough. NOPE! A week later, she comes back with this:
This last time, I went IN!!! Not into the differing doctrines, but in on HER. This is her 2nd time being DF'd for the same reason (a man)...and all the pics on her FB show some guy with a full beard and tats. So this is yet another round for her - which I calmly reminded her of. My issue lies in that fact that her main concern being DF'd should be herself - not me and my salvation. Are you kidding me? You don't get bonus points in heaven if you, being DF'd help someone else who is DF'd? HAHAHAHAHA...the nerve of these people. I tried to be nice. And I am one of those people that doesn't like putting folks on blast unless they absolutely deserve it. But THIS crap got under my skin. Again, get over yourself. Obviously she cannot didn't learn her lesson with the JWs the first time, now because she decides to go back a 2nd time, she wants to be a savior? smdh...
vent - over.
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Can baptism be considered a legal verbal agreement?
by StarTrekAngel inbased on the requirements set forth and the questions answered at the end.
i believe this question has been asked before.
the fact that you can only be expelled after having been put under this oath of allegiance and that you have witnesses to you making this agreement ( i remember my name was shout to the crowd when i entered the pool ).. if it can be considered so, would there be a legal ground to say minors can not enter this agreement?.
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babygirl30
This goes along with exactly what I had said to my parents when I was DF'd and they tried to put the guilt trip on me with the whole "you didn't live up to your dedication"...
Um...
1. I was baptized at 14yrs old
2. I wasn't old enough to vote
3. Wasn't old enough to drink alcohol
4. Couldn't legally consent to sex or marriage
5. Couldn't work FT legally
6. Couldn't be my own legal guardian
7. Was in 8th grade, was a nerd, had no friends, and loved Computers and books...
YET...I was supposedly 'smart' enough to knowingly make a decision to give my LIFE to a religion? Please!