I'm awake and still feeling trapped in this cult due to family.
It's a sickening feeling to read in the WT that they know it's wrong to divide a family over religion, that a religion shouldn't force families apart. And yet, that is exactly what they do. They, the WT hierarchs, fully know the emotional and mental pressure this can have on a person. They insist on absolute "loyalty" and will not tolerate anyone to speak against their controlling policies.
Having this forum to voice frustrations and share experiences with folks that have gone and are going through something similar is a real help for me--mentally, emotionally and in a subconscious level which I'm not fully able to pinpoint, coming to JWDF (Jehovah's Witness Discussion Forum) is like a breath of air when you're drowning, or an inoculation shot when you're surrounded by infectious disease, it's like a good shot of whiskey when going through a tragedy.
Finding out I wasted the most productive and best years of my adult life at the mercy and control of a self-serving cult is without a doubt a grievous tragedy. That said, I'm pouring myself a double and cheers to freedom of mind.