I think its called a mind-f#%& !! The worst kind. I'm in the fetal position in tears with frustration and heartache one day, then very grateful and optimistic the next. Im trying to find more balance and it helps to be around friends and be absorbed in the things im passionate about. Its a grieving process. I think i'll pull through!
freeflyingfaerie
JoinedPosts by freeflyingfaerie
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Did The Witnesses "Do A Job" On You?
by minimus inwere you really screwed up because of having been a witness?.
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Think of JW 's as Victims Instead of Enemies ? They get Conditional Love
by flipper ini have to give credit for this thread where credit is due- to the poster black sheep who used this expression in an answer on another thread recently.
" black sheep.. perhaps the leaders of the wt society are not victims - they are the ones handing out the mind control to the rank & file - ( i know some differ as to whether the leaders are victims as well ) - however that is not the purpose of debate on this thread.. the rank and file jehovah's witness members are trained to have relationships based on " conditions of obedience and membership ".
notice this quote from steve hassan's " releasing the bonds - empowering people to think for themselves " on the last paragraph of his introduction .
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freeflyingfaerie
That was well put, Flipper.
We were all victims in a sense too, before we left. So I try to remember that when they act cold. Although I personally dont recall ever treating anyone the way my family and friends do now that im df'd, i still love them and do see them as victims. So when it comes to hoping they'll wake up and smell the coffee, i go with the idea that you draw more flies with honey than with vinegar..but man its hard to be the bigger person when they deal out such dogmatic, nonsensical crap..and hurtful words like " we love Jehovah more than we love you, we choose him."
I still say i love you and give them hugs if ever i see them. My mom becomes a stone pillar when i do, but im not going to stop being me, i feel like hugging and saying i love you..if they feel awkward about it, maybe someday their natural feelings will eclipse the training they keep getting
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My blood pressure has gone down since I quit the Borg
by gubberningbody init used to be like 130/75 and now it's 98-102 over 65-70.. .
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freeflyingfaerie
Yess! My stress has gone down, down, down..
The stress JW's put upon themselves in no joke. Prepare for meetings, get ready for meetings, go to meetings, prepare for service, get ready for service, go in service, prepare for talks, give talks, ..it was like having 5 full-time jobs! When do you get to have a life? That is your life.
That is absolutely what started me on my way out...
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Really COOL(or Really DUMB) Vanity plates
by serenitynow! inso i have a 100 mile daily commute, so i see lots of plates.
i get a kick out of the good ones.
saw 2 hearses- toolate, lastrde, guy in a navy caprice classic-notfuzz; minivan-mmbeer.
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freeflyingfaerie
a hyandai that looks like a wanna be jaguar had a plate ~~hyaguar~~
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How long will I be an exJW vs a fomer JW?
by AllTimeJeff indrew sagan in a recent post (he recently graduated college) said this, something that i agree with and frankly, think about often.
to those of you who feel that you need to "help others" in the watchtower i give you this word of caution.
be careful, because that may simply be an excuse you are using to remain stuck in the past.
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freeflyingfaerie
...On reading AllTimeJeff's posts: it was fun while it lasted! Im a new one here, but spotted out your posts as being super great.
But i was thinking about that too, our identity and how the former JW aspect of our lives doesnt define us, but has affected our psyche. (some of you have probably been over this 1,000 times already and it may drive you a bit crazy to talk about it yet again, but im personally not done discussing it) This site is therapeutic for me, but i totally get it that people move on from frequenting here. Happy trails...
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Brazilian Wax ... is it JW approved?
by sacolton inwhat is the current "light" on this hairy subject?
is it okay for a jw to have a brazilian wax?.
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What does your sleep position reveal about your personality?
by Think About It inmine is the yearner position.. .
fetus position - a whopping 41% of participants sleep in this curled-up manner.
women are twice as likely to rest like this and it is listed as the most common position.
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freeflyingfaerie
~~starfish~~, but i usually sleep very sound
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I used to spend 3 hours a day here...thanks for my lifeline! THANKS ALL!
by oompa ini did that more days than i could count...i logged on at work all day and would check it hourly...then all evening at home.
i did this for a full two years i think.
this place is an incredible support group many of us may need due to the odd nature of many of our problems....that is what i used it for, even though many are here just for accurate information.. so thanks simon for caring enough all these years to compile and run this place....you have probably saved many lives...including mine btw but barely.....and of course you awesome contributors who came to my aid so many times....also a big thanks!!
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freeflyingfaerie
Yes! It's wonderful!!
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freeflyingfaerie
want to just clarify, i was disfellowshipped, i faded in the sense that i gradually left the religion of my entire family and of my whole life~~over the course of really about 6 months. Chose to meet w the elders for the inevitable disfellowshipping because i felt it was the right thing in my case, as so many friends and family were always hounding me, and i just needed to make it clear were i stood. That was what i personally needed to do so as to not feel hypocritical. Everyone's situation is so different
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freeflyingfaerie
When I was slowly coming out of the JW Coma, i stopped praying, stopped going out in 'service', missed more and more meetings, stopped answering phone calls for people to ask me to 'associate' with them, just going with what felt right~~and before i knew it, one day after a meeting i followed my heart, i looked around at all the 'brothers and sisters' and said to myself 'that was the last meeting I'm ever going to'..
..and it was. (that was January of 2009) And from that day forward, I kept walking...and walking...on my new path of freedom, and decided to take the backlash and hurt as it comes. And it did come. But not a day passes that i dont thank myself for listening to myself and fly away
The further i stepped away from it all, the more clear it was that it was a sick place to be. Its amazing to find that when you arent busy being brainwashed, you actually have thoughts and ideas of your own, and others have also. Original ones. The self-discovery and freedom from mind-control, life-control is worth the pain of losing family and friends ties. I want to be able to look in the mirror and recognize myself.
Enough about me. It is difficult sometimes, but once you see the cult for what it is, its a matter being true to yourself..