Thank you for this article. I started reading this a few months ago when it was sent to me. I read it off and on. The last year has been a difficult one, after my disfellowshipping last April. I've just been trying to heal and process what happened. Last night I received a phone call from my older sister telling me when the memorial was. It followed with a long conversation that left me feeling worse than not speaking to her at all. All the things I said, she followed up with the pat answers I would have given a few years ago. I will never change her thinking, and I don't appreciate being tagged as a worshipper of Satan now. My Father has been inactive for my entire life (45 yrs). He started going back to meetings a few years ago, but has expressed certain doubts to me. My sister told me that he said he doesn't want to be in "paradise" if I'm not there. I'm breaking her heart, and other guilt inducing comments. I know she means well, without a doubt. I'm just so frustrated. I really appreciated finishing this article. I know my story is like everyone elses, which I draw a lot of comfort in not being alone. I thanked her for calling, no one else had the thought to call, email me or anything. None of my family would even call me to say goodbye when they knew I'd be disfellowshipped.
My sister and I'm sure all my family and former friends have come up with their own reasons why I would allow myself to be disfellowshipped and not come back. It's probably a coping mechanism for them, but frustrating to me. Alan had to deal with the rumors going around about him, and we all do too I guess. It's easier to just not think about it, until it hits you full force in the face like last night. I wouldn't tell her, but I will not now nor ever go to another memorial for the rest of my life.