After reading everything this stupid "religion" has put you, your husband, your family through, why would you want to go back? Your need for social acceptance in the cult that you were raised in is understandable. It is time you grow up and realize you don't need other peoples approval not even your husbands to be happy. Please consider getting some professional help yourself and be supportive of your husband. You should be willing to fight a pitbull with AIDS before subjecting your baby to this organization. I hope your husband doesn't go back.
As somone raised JW like you, I understand your emotional dependence and need to be validated. But it's time we all grow up. Trust me I struggle with this too sometimes.
-CF