BrotherDan - I'm in Canada...I wonder if that was part of the manuscript?
NiceDream
JoinedPosts by NiceDream
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28
Sexism and the Organization
by brotherdan ini know this may be a touchy subject, but it's something that i think has been so obvious for the last few weeks at the meetings.
let me start by saying that i do understand the "headship" arrangement, and agree that it is biblical.. but it seems that the tendency is to take it way too far.
whenever speaking about training children, i've noticed that the boys are told to be trained by their fathers in various types of work, including trades.
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For those growing up with a non-JW parent
by JWinprotest injust curious to hear from those that have gone through a similar situation.
my dad was extremely opposed to jw's and went balistic when my mom converted.
he did everything in his power to keep us from becoming witnesses, (forcing us to stay home from meetings, forcing us to go to church with him on holidays) but i think that worked against him, because we viewed it as persecution.. here is my question though.
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NiceDream
It would be really difficult to grow up in a home like that. I'm sure your Dad had the best intentions, but it backfired on him instead.
Sometimes it's difficult to talk about our feelings out of the blue, maybe you could send him a nice letter instead. I'm sure that it would mean a lot to him, and he'd like to know that you understand where he was coming from.
Life is short! I would do it soon before it's too late.
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A Question To All on this Board
by kes152 inhello,.
i have been reading this board for some time and would like to ask: why you come here and post?
what do you all hope to accomplish by being here?.
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NiceDream
I joined to find support and research, and through the process I am learning lots of interesting ideas from people with different beliefs.
kes152 - Looks like you've been gone for awhile, welcome back! The overlapping generation got me wondering if the Governing Body was really directed by Holy Spirit because it keeps changing, so I looked on here and found out that I wasn't the only one who thought it was a bit of a stretch.
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2010 drama: historicity of Christians leaving Jerusalem between Roman wars
by Billy the Ex-Bethelite insorry if this has already been discussed, i haven't been around here a lot and i have this question for any history buffs.. this summer's dc is a fictionalized account of first century jehovah's witnesses (gag), leaving jerusalem right after the first attack by rome and fleeing to pella.. http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/members/private/194498/1/drama-audio-only.
other than jesus "this generation" prophecy, the bible mentions nothing directly about this.
even john, who wrote his gospel and letters afterward, makes no hint of events in jerusalem during that era.
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NiceDream
MadSweeny - I totally got your humour...and the "overlapping mountains" were priceless.
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Feeling really sad
by NiceDream inmy husband and i have been married for almost 10 years.
we were married really young, and tried to make the best of it.
recently, i began listening to my lingering doubts and realized i've been so unhappy because i was living a lie.
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NiceDream
Quandry - Congratulations on being married for almost 40 years! That's a wonderful accomplishment. I agree that if we can hang in there, it will be worth it in the end.
Nugget - It is definitely an adjustment after having a child! We have no time to talk with each other, but it's so important that we find the time to reconnect again. His parents live separate lives, and I don't want that to be us after our children leave the nest.
MrFreeze - Thank you very much for your kind words. I feel bad for my husband because he realizes that he is unable to communicate (not only with me, but with anyone). He is a very closed up individual. When we were dating, we could talk on the phone for hours, so I think counseling might help him to open up again. He's very repressed.
S8 - Thank you for your kind words as well. :) I'm happy that things worked out for you too. I've had doubts for 10 years, but it took my sister to leave for me to investigate them. The grip the society has on people is amazing! I'm reading a book for regular Christians on being a better wife, and so far my husband did notice a positive change from the book. We get along great if we don't talk about religion, so I'll put that on the shelf for now.
WTL - I think it's hard for witnesses to have things in common because we're supposed to spend all our time in theocratic activities. We feel guilty if we go on vacation and miss the meetings, or go to the park instead of on service. I'll try and find some fun things we can do together and as a family to build our relationship up again.
Chalam - Thank you for your suggestion. I've been reading the NIV Bible my friend gave me and found the message to be so different than the NWT. I hope I can get my husband to read it with me sometime. I noticed the Watchtower quoted from different Bible translations lately, and at our convention the speakers also quoted different Bible translations 3 times.
CHG - Thank you for sharing your experience. It's so hard to be married so young when you don't even know yourself yet.
TruthLover - Thank you for your helpful advice too. My husband does have low self-esteem, he's so smart and underestimates himself. I'm encouraging him to go back to school so he can get a job he'll enjoy more. I keep trying to reassure him that I love him and that our family comes first, I'll keep remembering to do that.
Scottiebear - I'm sorry you're going through a difficult time right now. I think being a Witness sometimes causes people to not develop very well socially. They can quickly dismiss things with "that's the world for you" anytime they feel uncomfortable with reality. Going away is something we really need. I'll start looking for a holiday soon.
LouBelle - "May you find your path and your truth." Thank you, this is what I really believe now, that everyone has their own path.
FinallyFree! - I really like your name, it's a wonderful feeling to be free. Thank you for your advice too. We've already invested a lot of time together, so hopefully he's willing to work on things too. I don't think he wants to lose anytime with our child, so he'll try and make it work.
Thank you again everyone for all the helpful advice and support. My husband and I have been through so much in the past couple years (car accident injuries and insurance problems, pregnancy, new baby, health problems, etc.), so I think getting away is a great idea. It's hard to take time out for your partner when you have a little one at home, but I hope if we did take some time, we could reconnect.
I find it funny that my husband thought I was so unhappy after we got married. I told him it was because he expected me to do things I didn't have to do at home, like going on service without question every Saturday morning, or rushing to get to all the meetings and being stressed out if we were a few minutes late. I felt it was more important to do my studies and prepare for FS, but he was all about the "perception." He didn't care if he was prepared as long as he was there.
I feel so much happier now that I realize this isn't the "truth." When we miss meetings, we have time to do our yardwork, talk to our neighbors, and go to the park and have fun.
He recently overheard me talking on the phone about telling my parents about my doubts and was really mad. He didn't bring it up with me, and I didn't bother either. Hopefully we'll be able to work this out sometime!
It would be hard for him to think he's losing me and our family. I keep reassuring him that I do love him and don't want to break up our family. He thought I was selfish for abandoning him and out child because I won't be in the new system. But I asked him why wouldn't I be there if I still choose to believe in God and the Bible and want to worship God with Spirit and Truth. Jesus is the way and the truth...not the WTBTS.
Thank you again everyone! We just had most of his family here visiting for the convention. They are spiritually strong, and quite a contrast to my husband. Sometimes I feel guilty that I've dragged him down, but I think if it was really important to him, he would be more spiritual?
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Head Count request, are you male or female? Lets count!
by asilentone inat her recent thread, changeling was asking us if there are more men than women leaving the org.
lets find out.. .
i am a male.
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NiceDream
I am woman, hear me roar!
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28
Sexism and the Organization
by brotherdan ini know this may be a touchy subject, but it's something that i think has been so obvious for the last few weeks at the meetings.
let me start by saying that i do understand the "headship" arrangement, and agree that it is biblical.. but it seems that the tendency is to take it way too far.
whenever speaking about training children, i've noticed that the boys are told to be trained by their fathers in various types of work, including trades.
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NiceDream
Great point NVL, Jesus also cooked fish on the beach for breakfast.
At the DC, my fav point was for women to talk to their husbands at a good time and bring them a glass of lemonade! It was such a wholesome point.
Another elder was asked what happens when his wife wants to talk to him because he's busy...and he smugly said "she makes an appointment!" The audience burst into laughter, and the guy looked all proud. I felt they made women look a bit stupid. Marriage can be a partnership based on love, not power.
Men are told they are the head of the house, but sadly in my age group, men seem to be too tired when they get home to take the lead. If women don't take the reins, sometimes things won't get done.
Helping out around the house is like foreplay! If men learn that, they'll be really happy.
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2010 drama: historicity of Christians leaving Jerusalem between Roman wars
by Billy the Ex-Bethelite insorry if this has already been discussed, i haven't been around here a lot and i have this question for any history buffs.. this summer's dc is a fictionalized account of first century jehovah's witnesses (gag), leaving jerusalem right after the first attack by rome and fleeing to pella.. http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/members/private/194498/1/drama-audio-only.
other than jesus "this generation" prophecy, the bible mentions nothing directly about this.
even john, who wrote his gospel and letters afterward, makes no hint of events in jerusalem during that era.
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NiceDream
Very interesting! Thank you for the historical background Billy. My sis-in-law shared with everyone how it reminded her of 1973...and then someone asked if she meant 1975. I failed to see how the very short time period in the drama related to waiting many decades for the end to come...only to wait more time for the end to come...and we're still waiting...
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I feel so discourage
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NiceDream
Hang in there Desi It's really hard to break through with logic because they fight it. If this isn't the "truth," then what is? They can't get past that until something makes them crack from the inside.
Your husband sounds like he's thinking about things though, and even admitted that the generation teaching doesn't sound inspired by Holy Spirit.
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How often does a Wt song run through your head
by Lady Lee inyesterday i was sitting here and all of a sudden realized i was humming one of those dreadful songs.
i even remembered the words!
<chills>.. so i sat here and started singing other songs out loud, which i normally don't do even though i live alone and don't have to listen to people begging me to stop singing.. so how do you get those songs out of your head?.
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NiceDream
Only if someone mentions one. These new songs aren't catchy...I don't think I'll ever get one stuck in my head.
I listen to the radio, so I always have different songs in my head.