Posts by NiceDream

23

question for those with husbands/wives in the borg

by Evidently Apostate in

jw
friends

how do you respond when they question your enlightenment?

do you find yourself holding back explaining specific doctrinal flaws or let it fly both barrels?

i know we want our loved one to see things for what they are but even a tactfull response will cause the borg teachings to take over and everything becomes an absolute with my wife.

NiceDream

Gary - my husband said the exact same thing, the "truth" is the "most right religion" to him. He said he will always be a witness, and if the witnesses don't have the "truth" then there is no God.

I'm still interested in the Bible, and want to go to church. Unfortunately I can't at the moment, but I would love for my little one to see the difference between the religions. I don't think my husband would stay in it if his whole family left, but it will take a long time to reach that point.

I was basically born-in, but I saw the hypocrisy and lies. It helped having solid "wordly" friends in school to show me that there are nice people and other Christians out there that don't seserve to die.

EA - Sometimes I think my hopes are in vain too. Sending you a PM.

23

question for those with husbands/wives in the borg

by Evidently Apostate in

jw
friends

how do you respond when they question your enlightenment?

do you find yourself holding back explaining specific doctrinal flaws or let it fly both barrels?

i know we want our loved one to see things for what they are but even a tactfull response will cause the borg teachings to take over and everything becomes an absolute with my wife.

NiceDream

I was very shocked when I realized that this wasn't "the truth" and told my husband various things I learned, like how 607 isn't really supported. He agreed to that, and even agreed the JWs make mistakes and aren't "inspired."

I told him things I didn't understand, like the new generation, and asked why does the Holy Spirit keep making the faithful and discreet slave change their minds on things. He didn't have an answer. He doesn't want to go there.

Now, he refuses to talk about anything religious with me. We got into some pretty heated arguments before, and it was like he was going to snap. He just can't mentally handle going there.

So how do I deal with it? I'm just waiting and hoping things will change. I have great friends on here that I talk about religious things with and vent when I need to.

Good luck! It's really tough feeling alone inside.

23

No Spiritual Heritage

by serenitynow! in

for the born/raised ins, do you feel that you no longer have a spiritual heritage/background/traditions?

i was sitting at my desk absentmindedly humming a "kingdom melody" from the brown songbook, when i realized what i was doing and made myself stop.

there were songs that i really enjoyed.

NiceDream

"That's nice that she has a person to help her be 'normal'." (Sorry, don't know how to box quote)

She is really lucky to have that. I don't really know how to throw a holiday party or anything either, but I did have a little 'unbirthday' party for my little guy. The cupcake I made had a super crappy icing job on it, but the candles kinda took away from that. The look on my little boy's face was priceless when he got to blow out the candle.

23

No Spiritual Heritage

by serenitynow! in

for the born/raised ins, do you feel that you no longer have a spiritual heritage/background/traditions?

i was sitting at my desk absentmindedly humming a "kingdom melody" from the brown songbook, when i realized what i was doing and made myself stop.

there were songs that i really enjoyed.

NiceDream

Sorry I didn't really answer your question. My parents became witnesses when I was 4, so I remember celebrating Halloween and Christmas once. For the most part, I felt left out at school when the other kids got to exchange Valentines or sing carols.

Sometimes I do feel sad that my parents didn't do anything special instead of holidays...like wrap a gift up for me. We didn't do much as a family when I got a bit older, and that's a sad heritage to give your child. We didn't do much spiritually as a family either, so I felt like I was in a weird limbo.

23

No Spiritual Heritage

by serenitynow! in

for the born/raised ins, do you feel that you no longer have a spiritual heritage/background/traditions?

i was sitting at my desk absentmindedly humming a "kingdom melody" from the brown songbook, when i realized what i was doing and made myself stop.

there were songs that i really enjoyed.

NiceDream

A great thing is you can start anytime and make new traditions for your family. You can pass on whatever you like! Little things like going to pick apples or pumpkins in the fall is one I'd like to make. Or having a movie night and make popcorn every Friday night. You can even decorate for the seasons to make your home look a little festive without having "holiday" decorations if you're not ready yet.

Some of my best memories that don't involve anything JW was going to the park or beach as a family, or going to the fair every summer. Simple little things that made you feel special as a child.

I haven't celebrated holidays yet because my husband is inactive, but mentally still "in," but I am looking forward to celebrating Christmas. I've always loved the decorations and carols.

One of my friends faded and is married to a "wordly" guy, and he is really sweet about holidays. He walks her through holiday festivities and they've made their own traditions.

200

Demons and the WTS

by brotherdan in

i remember growing up and hearing all sorts of stories about demonic activity from people.

some would be experiences that people had going door to door and visiting a "witch" or "warlock".

some would inadvertently go to a fortune tellers door and have a demonic experience.. i was always facinated by all the stories.

NiceDream

Good question BrotherDan, my friend talked to me about that recently. She feels that speaking in tongues needs an interpreter like it says in the Bible. No one speaks in tongues at her church, and you don't need to speak in tongues to show you have the Holy Spirit or anything.

29

An active Witness proudly tells me about Shunning her kids back into the 'truth"

by AuntBee in

"as he is a god of love.. these things serve to protect individuals aswell as the congregations.

as a parent i fully understand the concept of wanting my children to choose their friends wisely, to be careful about literature they read & so on & would i cast them out for being wayward?

yes, i have, & they learnt their lesson & were welcomed back with immediacy the minute they made the necessary changes.

NiceDream

It's really sad. There was a part about shunning at the DC this summer that was sickening. The GB said not to look for any reason to associate with those who are DF'd. And then they said that if your child is DF'd, the most loving thing you can do is to obey Jeh's law on this (shunning), because if you don't, your child may never come back and it would be your fault.

I feel sad for the parents who are brainwashed or guilted into believing this.

62

When you realized that it was all a lie.. how did you cope?

by stuckinamovement in

jw
friends

i realized about a year ago after much lurking here, that the truth was in fact a lie.

it rocked me to my core to come to the understanding that everything that i have been taught, believed in and taught people myself was in fact not true.

when you are a born in like myself, the teachings of the wts become all you know.

NiceDream

After "fading" without realizing it, I stopped going to the meetings because they were giving me anxiety.

I met up with a former elder from my hall who left a few years ago with his wife. It was inspiring to see how happy they are, and how they made new friends and are having lots of fun after being out of the org for a couple years.

I read another Bible translation and did a bunch of reading on this site.

My husband is still "in" although he's inactive. One day I hope we can be out of the org together.

I have lots of anger, feeling like my life was a lie, but I'll be starting counseling next week.

Wishing you all the best!

I'm Canadian too...but I don't drink beer.

47

Email I sent to mom after huge fight today

by meangirl in

well my mom and i got into a pretty bad argument today over the phone.

it basically came down to the fact that she couldn't handle what i was saying about the organization, etc and all she could come back to me was that i "hated her?

" i guess i just wanted to share and vent a little too....thanks for letting me do so.. .

NiceDream

Well said meangirl! Your letter almost had me in tears. I have a lot of anger too...wasting almost 30 years in this, and will be getting counseling next week.

Wishing you happiness and healing.

19

New JW social site...JWFind.net!

by yknot in

jw
friends

http://www.jwfind.net/.

appears to have launched in spring 2009....... jwfind.net principlesa true companion is loving all the time, and is a brother that is born for when there is distress.

(proverbs 17:17).

NiceDream

You just need a current KM to join...I guess they needed tougher questions for security reasons...

I like how they have pictures of "recently approved" ones too...sounds official.