Posts by VampireDCLXV

you have about 6 types of people posting on jwn, they all fit into a profile.. #1 you have people like me that ran the race, exemplified conduct while in the jw cult and learned through observation that there was a severe disconnect between truth, and the jw cult's statements.

VampireDCLXV

A #8 should include folks who grew up JW, tried to be as good as they could be but nearly lost their minds trying to fit in and gave up because it was too depressing to stay in...

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92

Pre-emptive shunning - a growing reality

by cedars in

i'm scanning through some of the results from the 2012 jw survey as they're coming in.. the most populous of the six voting categories with 76 voters so far is my own category, for those who are inactive, or "faded/fading" (not disfellowshipped or da'd, but no longer reporting time on the ministry).. one statistic already leaping out at me surrounds the question "do you experience 'pre-emptive shunning' from active witnesses, who view you as 'bad association'?

" of the 74 who voted on this so far, 76% have answered "yes" to this question.. it's early days, and obviously i will have a clearer picture of the extent of the problem once the survey closes at the end of the year.

however, the results already in suggest that pre-emptive shunning is widespread among inactive ones, despite this not being an "official" policy of the society.. i was interested in your opinions as to why this may be?

VampireDCLXV

I'd say that #1 and #3 were at the forefront of a litany of reasons why people were snubbing me and talking behind my back in the end. If you're not a Pioneer, Elder, MS or close family or associate of, you're nothing (or even less than nothing). Isn't being part of Jehovah's holy organization great?

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92

Pre-emptive shunning - a growing reality

by cedars in

i'm scanning through some of the results from the 2012 jw survey as they're coming in.. the most populous of the six voting categories with 76 voters so far is my own category, for those who are inactive, or "faded/fading" (not disfellowshipped or da'd, but no longer reporting time on the ministry).. one statistic already leaping out at me surrounds the question "do you experience 'pre-emptive shunning' from active witnesses, who view you as 'bad association'?

" of the 74 who voted on this so far, 76% have answered "yes" to this question.. it's early days, and obviously i will have a clearer picture of the extent of the problem once the survey closes at the end of the year.

however, the results already in suggest that pre-emptive shunning is widespread among inactive ones, despite this not being an "official" policy of the society.. i was interested in your opinions as to why this may be?

VampireDCLXV

It's kinda funny that I was doing everything right, more or less, and I still got the shaft from people in my congregation. I DID attended meetings and field service regularly. I DID attend social functions and special visits from overseers. I DID NOT do much of anything that would be seen as outright inappropriate or questionable. People STILL talked behind my back and snubbed me like I had some communicable disease. All the "preemptive shunning" eventually made me depressed to the point where I HAD to stop attending FS and meetings eventually or end up in the local psych ward. It was only a sense of pure self preservation that forced me to stop my activities as a JW. I only started questioning and finding out the dirt on the WTS later on...

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12

I Would Like To Start A "Special Place In Hell" thread

by watson in

jw
friends

VampireDCLXV

Dare we name some names?

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39

My really long introduction...

by Madge in

jw
friends

okay, so i am new to the site, but i have been following ur threads for awhile now, and i am finding great comfort in them!

no, i am not a witness and i have never been, and never will be!

i did however, date a witness for about three years.. it was our typical 357th biweekly 'man hating' girls night out, and meeting mr. right was the last thing on my mind!

VampireDCLXV

Dearest Madge,

I read your story above with a horrified fascination. I am truly grieved over what you've suffered through with this fella and his JW ilk. I think that I can be fairly certain that you've heard the old saying about "leading a horse to water". A person simply cannot accept certain truths in life until they are emotionally ready to... and some folks simply never can. I'd strongly suggest that you cut this guy out of you and your daughter's lives until he finally makes up his mind to leave the JWs for good and never return. As long as your former Beau and others like him sit on the fence, there will remain a mental landmine that could get triggered and go off almost any day when you least expect it and send them running back to their former JW associates and all the horrors that come with it. In short: CUT YOUR LOSSES. We, here, have witnessed the failure of many marriages and relationships with these kinds of fence sitters over the years and they seem to rarely (if ever) end up in "happily ever after". You are wise to protect yourself and your baby from this toxic venom that the WTS promulgates and promotes through their JW worker bees. Take care...

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52

How many people on here have low self-esteem?

by Chemical Emotions in

jw
friends

i do, so i was just curious.. i know the org tends to attract/cause/contribute to people having low self-esteem, so i figure a lot of people must have it as bad or worse than me..

VampireDCLXV

I've had depression as well as thoughts of suicide/not wanting to live anymore ever since my early teens and I knew that there was SOMETHING wrong but I didn't quite know what it was. All I knew was that I didn't feel good. It wasn't until after I graduated that I even heard of depression and the "low self esteem" that was at the root of it. It's only since I've decided to leave the JWs for good that, in turn, I found the root causes of my "low self esteem" and my negative thinking/self concept: It was the garbage I had to put up with from other JWs and the guilt drilled into my head by the WTS! I got rid of most of the JWs in my life and I'm trying to shed the guilt and shame instilled in me via my upbringing. The proper medication (for me) that I've received as of late seems to have really tipped the scales, though. Chatting with fellow XJWs online helps a lot too: It helps knowing that I'm not alone.

With all that being said, I don't believe so much in the concept of "self esteem" as in *self kindness*. I believe that people should be kind to themselves in that they should be forgiving, accepting and tolerant of their own mistakes and personal flaws, just like they should be with those of everyone else. People should be gentle and nurturing to themselves instead of beating themselves up for previous mistakes and present personality flaws. It's kind of like the Golden Rule in reverse: One should treat his/herself in a way that others would want and expect to be treated by him/her. The concept of self sacrifice as exemplified by the Judeo/Christian tradition is often taken way out of context by modern society. OTOH, too high a sense of "self esteem" is little more than narcissism, really...

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30

Thoughts and Opinions on the VAA?

by arko_n9ne in

as i've posted multiple times before, i am new to many of the aspects of wts scandals so a couple weeks ago, i was on youtube and heard of a group concept from tim kilgore called the vaa (vast apostate army).. personally, i like the concept of former witnesses and anti-watchtower proponents uniting to stand against the wrong doings of the organization.

i would like their rally in a few years to succeed.

if things look promising enough, i more than likely will go.. but honestly, i don't know much about the vaa, and since it's not a concept with that "new car smell" i imagine people have more infor to offer.. i saw on older posts that witnesses are not fans of the idea of anyone banding together en masse against them, as they go to the lengths of calling the vaa a terrorist organization (though no acts of violence or tyranny have been committed or threatened).. so if anyone can offer insight into this group, it would help a man know if it's a group worth rallying with.. .

VampireDCLXV

Since I'm part of the Facebook group, I might as well chime in. I, for now, am just a silent spy and collaborator. I'm sitting in the background trying to learn and develop tactics and dirty tricks BUT I will not just stand by and allow the local JWs recruit the unwary without saying anything about it. I speak of my experiences with the JWs and about what they teach with anyone who will listen. I hope to eventually be a source of help and support for XJWs in my area who become inactive or get kicked out and can't decide if they want to stay away for good or not. If I can see enough of a groundswell heading for Brooklyn in 2017, I'll be there too.

I'm with you, Tim...

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40

Foolproof Dating Tip For Women

by bigmouth in

i'm prompted to impart this piece of priceless information due to a few posts on the subject of dating and compatability lately.. do you want to be able to predict if the man you're keen on will treat you well ?.

this is my yardstick: does he love cats ?

find out early in the piece about his attitude toward cats.