Posts by rafreuter

9

Saving myself from getting dunked, how did I get here?

by pubtruth in

this is my personal experience with this sad cult, which i want so out of.

it's quite a read, so if you're up for it, grab a drink and follow along... it's something very different from what ive read on here before.. .

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rafreuter

In ways i truly cannot explain, i relate to this 10000000 times over. I too had someone out me, and it is the worse feeling in the world. DON'T DO IT. Simply say it's not your time. They can't do anything to you really since you aren't baptized.

1

End of the world starts at 6:30 may 21 where ever that is the time

by dogon in

well, here we are at the end times.

how is american soma dong?

did the dead rise up from the grave?

rafreuter

Don't know about you, but I think my house is on top of some ancient indian reservation... I've seen a few tomahawks poking through the ground and some fingers :( a tad scared hahaha.

Also, is your a avatar a picture of two guys shaking wangs? if so, i tip my hat to you sir ahaha

5

Mac users be alert: Malware for Macs spreading

by poppers in

today a malware on my mac turned up when i opened my hotmail, but fortunately i didn't fall for it - it said something like "apple security alert", and then gave a notice that my computer has been infected with viruses, and it showed a bunch of files/programs that have been infected and the number of viruses it supposedly found.

if you get something similar don't click on anything, including the cancel button that it displays.

do a force quite on your browser and restart your computer; check to see if any files were downloaded and trash them if there were any then empty your trash.

rafreuter

This is not as big a problem as a lot of people may think... It's simply software that opens porn on its own making you beleive there is a virus on your system and prompting you to enter your credit card.

If you have downloaded it, and it opens the install window, CLICK X AND DRAG THE FOLDER IN THE DOWNLOADS SECTION TO THE TRASH AND EMPTY IT.

If you've installed it, Go to activity monitor, kill the process and drag the icon from the applications folder to the trash.

All safe :]

53

Help me...

by rafreuter in

i wish this weren't the way i greeted the board.

i've been lurking here for about 2 years now, but was unable to really interact because of limitations of my ipod browser (you can't post from there) and the parental controls on my computer.. .

well 2 years later, i'm a big boy, turned 18 and moved out.

rafreuter

Raf: If you need to go home, then do so. You're in the process of developing your adult identity and if making peace with your parents is necessary, then it's necessary.

To those who understand, what Cadellin says is exactly how i feel right now. My sexuality is so much less important to me right now than my mother. I don't think I could deal in my adult life without her. Her and I were always close, even when my family first figured out that something was up. I've talked to my dad and of course there will be somethings that have to change, but most of that means little to me. I just want my family back. I want my room back. I want my dogs back.

I know eventually those things will be gone, but I don't want them to be gone NOW because i wanted a freedom that didnt make me happy. I want them to be gone because there is nothing i can do about it, and then I'll be able to deal with it in maturity.

Again, I really can't thank you all enough for being here at least for me to get my thoughts out in clear form, in a way where i could mull it over and repeat it to myself.

53

Help me...

by rafreuter in

i wish this weren't the way i greeted the board.

i've been lurking here for about 2 years now, but was unable to really interact because of limitations of my ipod browser (you can't post from there) and the parental controls on my computer.. .

well 2 years later, i'm a big boy, turned 18 and moved out.

rafreuter

Thank you all for the support. I've made the decision to go back home tomorrow unless something Dramatic happens to change that. I thank you all for the support and wish you well in life.

With or without the org, I can't function without my family. I was too much a part of them and nothing would be the same without their support. Maybe someday I'l be back here? Who knows? :]

53

Help me...

by rafreuter in

i wish this weren't the way i greeted the board.

i've been lurking here for about 2 years now, but was unable to really interact because of limitations of my ipod browser (you can't post from there) and the parental controls on my computer.. .

well 2 years later, i'm a big boy, turned 18 and moved out.

rafreuter

Laverite- I read your story and... :( I saw so many parallels, and I hope if i Decide to stay and weather the storm, That i will at that point of contentment one day. Thank you for charing your experience!

Chalam, Thanks for the sentiments :] If there is a God, I don't think he would have made it THIS difficult to follow ONE principle that literally is intertwined with one's life.

Nelly, Thanks for the sympathy. And i totally understand that going back would DEFINITELY entail being involved with the religion again. My dad told me I'm "welcome into the house anytime as long as I'm willing to do things Jehovah's Way." I also understand going back is a defeat. But what can i do? If i can't handle it, then i can't handle it.

Cadellin, talk about stress lol.

1. I'm still in High School and unfortunately, our counselors are usually just for schedule changes and are not as much counselors as much as they are life-planners. I talk to one, but there's only so much she can do with limited knowledge of the religion.

2. i have read Crisis. Its a good book in regards to organizational flaws. However, my dad apparently has knowledge of the book, so I've been thinking maybe I'm giving too much credit to one book..

3. I HAVE!! :] and they definitely help.

4. I have told them that I still love them, that I love them as my parents and that wont change.

Notverylikely, unfortunately i don't have a year. Being my senior year in school, i don't have that much time to dillydally while i decide what im gonna do with my life.

Little Imp, I TOTALLY can empathize. Because my family was very highly regarded in our hall, and i being the son of an elder, when i stopped giving talks, stopped going in service regularly, grew my hair a little longer, so many people thought i was just the ugly duckling or something. i heard so much of people talking about me and i hated it.

PrimateDave, that would be the ideal situation. I wish my parents would bend at least a little bit in such a hard rule they have to follow (even better if they got out of the org altogether) but My dad made it clear i was only to call "every once in a while" just to let him know i was alive. that's it :/

Cook My socks, as you said you are most definitely entitled to your opinion. Might i ask you to google "what the bible does and doesn't say about homosexuality?" You'll find that most of what is in the bible regarding gays is not what God intended to be in there at all and that those mistranslations just helped further biases certain men had.

ProdigalSon, I found that very true and enlightening. I agree that intolerance in society will be gone in a few years (towards gays) and it's only till people figure out how to really interpret things will the majority's view change.

OUTLAAAAWWWW!!!! When lurking i always enjoyed your picture posts. and your silly dog. I gotta say its a pickup seeing it addressed to me xD funny joke.

Mouthy, Thank you for your words!!! I'll definitely look into that book. and no, iI'm not the type of person to just mess around for the heck of it. I don't think being gay is wrong, but I do think sleeping around whether one is heterosexual or not is wrong. I know people would judge me and I'm putting all of these things on a figurative scale. thanks again!!! :]

53

Help me...

by rafreuter in

i wish this weren't the way i greeted the board.

i've been lurking here for about 2 years now, but was unable to really interact because of limitations of my ipod browser (you can't post from there) and the parental controls on my computer.. .

well 2 years later, i'm a big boy, turned 18 and moved out.

rafreuter

Tec, thanks for your words of encouragement. It does help to know that I'm not so alone.

Coco, I'll definitely be here in the month I've alotted myself. and yeah, I know how to open my PM's :]

Broken Promises, I guess the thing is that for the past two years I thought this would be such a liberating experience. And then for it to fall apart right in front of me..

I guess what's getting me is the way i saw my mom cry the next day. How my dad said i killed him when i told him i was gay. I know at some point, I have to be independent from my parents, but I can't imagine its this difficult for everyone who goes off for college or just goes to work in another state.

53

Help me...

by rafreuter in

i wish this weren't the way i greeted the board.

i've been lurking here for about 2 years now, but was unable to really interact because of limitations of my ipod browser (you can't post from there) and the parental controls on my computer.. .

well 2 years later, i'm a big boy, turned 18 and moved out.

rafreuter

Thank you both. Lady Lee, I've told myself that no matter how I feel, I'm forcing myself a month in my new living situation to see how "the other side" is. So you're post was helpful in helping me see I wasn't the only one thinking that way :]

St. George, Thanks for the sentiments :] and yes, I'm going to college fall '11. Even if i were to go back, i don't think i would allow myself to be told not to plan for the future, I'd still have myself and others to help out.

53

Help me...

by rafreuter in

i wish this weren't the way i greeted the board.

i've been lurking here for about 2 years now, but was unable to really interact because of limitations of my ipod browser (you can't post from there) and the parental controls on my computer.. .

well 2 years later, i'm a big boy, turned 18 and moved out.

rafreuter

I wish this weren't the way I greeted the board. I've been lurking here for about 2 years now, but was unable to really interact because of limitations of my iPod browser (you can't post from there) and the parental controls on my computer.

Well 2 years later, I'm a big boy, turned 18 and moved out. Left a note of disassociation and said good riddance.

Best decision of my life, right? Well, no. I've only just moved out Monday and I can't sleep. Food doesn't taste the same. I can't focus in school and I miss my family regardless of whether or not they accept me. You see, I left because I'm gay and understood totally that's not accepted within the organization. Upon finding this out, i began to question the organization and it's supposed inspired knowledge and "food at the right time." I thought, "If the organization truly believes that homosexuality is a choice (which anyone who is gay definitely knows it is not) then how could they be so sure about everything else?" and the rest is basically history. Prophecy failures, doctrinal flaws, the generation teaching, to name a few.

But now that I've crossed my Rubicon, I can't help but feel I'm slowly dying on the inside. I moved in with a Family that is caring, i have the best friends in the world to support me, so I'm running out of things to fill the void. I'm considering going back even if that means I have to lull myself back to sleep in regards to the flaws of the organization. At this point, suprresing my sexuality doesnt even sound so bad. What's freedom if I'm not happy? I just can't help but feel like Winston at the end of 1984...

So I guess what I'm asking for is pros and cons of moving back which essentially involves being a witness. Is this just something I'm going to have to deal with for a bit? Or is it always like this?

Thanks in advance.