Posts by bottleofwater

35

Strangest comment

by drewcoul in

what is the strangest or most wacked-out comment or answer you've ever heard at a wt or book study?.

i remember at the cong.

wt study, we were studying about the jews being led out of egypt by moses.

bottleofwater

you bet he was talking about an ice cream cone... ELDERS!!! ELDERS!!! This brother here was advocating oral sex!!!

Later...

Brother SoAndSo, may we talk to you for a moment...

We want to talk to you because we want to help you.

We would like to ask you a couple of questions because you haven't seemed too open to us.

"Do you watch pornography?"

"Have you ever given or received oral sex?" "And you know, brother, that even if you did, it doesn't mean that you will be disfellowshipped." (bullshit alert)

28

What Did You Expect to Do During the 1,000 Years?

by Ding in

for those who were jws, what did you expect to do during the 1,000 year reign?.

since only loyal jws would survive armageddon, it seemed to me that field service and tms would be eliminated.. so what did you expect to do with your time, besides getting rid of the dead bodies and petting lions?.

bottleofwater

Drive cars that people left behind...

24

..Are you Ready for a McWedding?...

by OUTLAW in

just when you thought the world couldn`t get any tackier... .

the mcdonald's wedding packageby john farrier in business on oct 14, 2010 at 2:24 pmafter a couple met, dated, and then hosted their wedding party at a mcdonalds location in hong kong, the company began offering wedding packages in that city:.

the package has all the details to attract a wedding banquet cynic or a golden arches obsessive: a baked apple pie wedding cake, dress made out of party balloons, kiddie party favors for guests, and of course, catering by mcdonalds.. alcohol is banned to make sure there wont be drunk party guests acting inappropriately at the family venue, so newly weds will have to toast their union with soft drinks instead.. the cost will be a few thousand hong kong dollars, depending on what guests order on the spot.

bottleofwater

That is definitely suggestive, undercover. I'm going to tell the elders on you.

35

Strangest comment

by drewcoul in

what is the strangest or most wacked-out comment or answer you've ever heard at a wt or book study?.

i remember at the cong.

wt study, we were studying about the jews being led out of egypt by moses.

bottleofwater

Not Jehovah - The WTBTS!

16

Being A JW Is FUN!!

by Pig in

some people think that it must be miserable to be a jw because they dont celebrate christmas or birthdays.. but they're wrong!

being a jw is miserable because you cant do fucking anything.. crazy hair day - this was a fundraising day where kids come to school with blue or red died hair and give a $2 donation.

i wasnt allowed to do this because it was too worldly to have "crazy hair" and it would be too hard to wash it out for tomorrow nights meeting.. school camp - this was unnessisary association with those devil worshipping 9 year olds.

bottleofwater

Oh yeah and dare not let anyone see your iPod. We know you have rap / hip-hop songs on there, even though you've been unbiblically counseled not to.

24

..Are you Ready for a McWedding?...

by OUTLAW in

just when you thought the world couldn`t get any tackier... .

the mcdonald's wedding packageby john farrier in business on oct 14, 2010 at 2:24 pmafter a couple met, dated, and then hosted their wedding party at a mcdonalds location in hong kong, the company began offering wedding packages in that city:.

the package has all the details to attract a wedding banquet cynic or a golden arches obsessive: a baked apple pie wedding cake, dress made out of party balloons, kiddie party favors for guests, and of course, catering by mcdonalds.. alcohol is banned to make sure there wont be drunk party guests acting inappropriately at the family venue, so newly weds will have to toast their union with soft drinks instead.. the cost will be a few thousand hong kong dollars, depending on what guests order on the spot.

bottleofwater

I think they both need a psychiatric evaluation. Kind of like some JWs do. Haven't you ever heard some go emotionally spastic over something?

Just say paradise in front of some sisters and you'll see them literally orgasm in front of you...

15

Missing bible verses

by Joey Jo-Jo in

does anyone know what happen to:-.

matt23:14 18:11 17:21. john5:4 7:53 8:11. luke 23:17. .

edit:never mind found the old thread.

bottleofwater

Was it the one about the three day convention of some other religion and you show the different day's theme of their convention which happens to be --- each time?

49

How do I cut off pioneering?

by bottleofwater in

i'm 19 and trying to get a job.

my dad won't pay for my college if i don't pioneer.. if i get a job, i can't pioneer while in college.. i can supposedly work and study, but i need a good way to get rid of pioneering (it was never my idea in the first place - blame the parents with their social coercion).. if i stop pioneering, i will be told by my parents that i don't love jehovah (not that i care what they say).. how can i do this as painlessly as possible?.

i want to move out someday and have enough money to do this.. by the way, if you read my started topics you will see my situation in more detail and that my dad is the coordinator of the boe..

bottleofwater

Kind of reminds me of those unmarried 40-year-old sisters who wait on Jehovah... Oh I'll bet they'll be waiting... and waiting... and waiting... RIP

24

..Are you Ready for a McWedding?...

by OUTLAW in

just when you thought the world couldn`t get any tackier... .

the mcdonald's wedding packageby john farrier in business on oct 14, 2010 at 2:24 pmafter a couple met, dated, and then hosted their wedding party at a mcdonalds location in hong kong, the company began offering wedding packages in that city:.

the package has all the details to attract a wedding banquet cynic or a golden arches obsessive: a baked apple pie wedding cake, dress made out of party balloons, kiddie party favors for guests, and of course, catering by mcdonalds.. alcohol is banned to make sure there wont be drunk party guests acting inappropriately at the family venue, so newly weds will have to toast their union with soft drinks instead.. the cost will be a few thousand hong kong dollars, depending on what guests order on the spot.

bottleofwater

The only wedding JWs can afford without getting into debt. This is how to live a simple life.

11

Gay JWs - how did you deal with your Kool-Aid drinking relatives?

by bottleofwater in

just wondering.

i'm gonna need that soon.

i'm talking about advice.

bottleofwater

I dunno. He started to really panic and tell me "I'm not gay, I'm not gay". Believe me, he looked really nervous and worried.

Yup, I bet he's a liar. JW and liar are not mutually exclusive.