Posts by clearpoison

8

Ever Disturbed by Something an Elder Said to You Personally?

by Cthulhu in

jw
friends

i used to go out in service with this particular elder and after a while he developed a habit of saying...disturbing things.

i remember one occasion where he reminisced in rather graphic detail about a handjob some other guy gave him in school.

i recall another service venture when we passed a woman out walking her dog and he asks "do you ever wonder how many women who own dogs have sex with them?

clearpoison

Absolutelly, they once said, we have been considering you for bigger responsibilities. They never did that again.

CP

30

the official wt understanding on where to park your butt during the meeting is to move around from meeting to meeting in order to get in more association or whatever but i never really saw things that way.

the kh seating arraingment at my hall went as follows;.

if you sat in the front you were really late or wanted to seem really spiritual.. the elders and pioneers always liked the same seats every meeting.. shiftless ones and those who wanted sympathy for thier back ailments would stand in the back during the talks.. ever had a sister in your hall bring in their own chair and footstool?.

clearpoison

Usually 3rd row from back either left or center, depending on how many seats was needed with family. Yes I've seen own chairs (comfortable ones) in meetings too.

CP

21

Update: part 2, elder's counsel to mom to quit "bad association"

by Coffee House Girl in

well because i knew the questions would be the same on saturday as they were friday i was even more prepared.

my mom has this pattern of repeating the same questions over and over again...she will leave it for a few hours & then she will cycle them over again, but then ask more detail.. so saturday she calls me before i leave for home and now she is backpedalling her story.

she tells me that the elder's never said that they were going to disfellowship me, they just were counseling her that she should no longer be associating with me because i am bad association and have been seen with "him" (again with the him) and that his car has been seen parked there all the time.

clearpoison

CHG it's nice you show in active way you are not about to abandon her, whatever happens here. One question is raised in my mind here though. Looking at your postings I've got an impression that you have severe enough relationship with CSG. If I recall it right you even considered showing him openly to your family at one stage. What I understand here based on these two last postings is that you actually decided to lie to your mom and smoothen the importance of this relation. Don't get me wrong, I think even morally there are situations it's more correct to lie or at least leave some important details unmentioned, so I'm not accusing you for anything. Just wanted to understand your final reasoning around this, what were the goods and bads when you decided go this path.

CP

64

Strange, Offensive , Weird Statements on DFing Offenses in Elders Manual

by flipper in

jw
friends

you really can't make this stuff up.

but an organization like the wt society bent on controlling virtually every aspect of the typical jehovah's witness life - would make this up to keep their control through the use of fear and guilt.

so- i thought i'd share what i thought was the strangest, most offensive, weird language dealing with what the wt society calls " disfellowshipping offenses " .

clearpoison

Point 5. Easy thing concerning males at least. It doesn't even need to be thin underwear it could be thick jeans too. I can tell from personal experience that this is possible. When the dang is let us say excited you can have almost any clothes on and superior excitement is possible. So, actually we should have faced JC handling, but now it's so many years ago so it really do not matter. Hey, afterall I married her.

CP

25

"MARRY ONLY IN THE LORD"CRUEL LAW FOR WOMEN

by jam in

i have seen ads for women looking for men that love the lord, that,s ok. you have something in common.

but i have notice that can be a big mistake.. for example, my brother is a widower and have tried dating women in his.

church.

clearpoison

Dear Dgp, I do not think in those paths at all. Sorry if I gave that impression.

I just think that there are more sides in this. Paul is telling this is his personal opinion, and he is telling his opinion to save us from trouble. Intentions have been good and they may very well been suitable for the specific time, even with stricktest interpretation. Our human interpretation of rules turned to principle turned to new rule, do not diminish the good intentions that might have been there. That was my point for that part.

Yes, implementing this view today in hardcore mode is problematic specially for women, for reasons stated earlier.

This is really not JW only practise. As far as I have understood a catholic girl cannot be wed to a protestant boy in catholic church. Where I live both parties must have been confirmed as members of to the main protestant church if they want to be wed in their church. Even where arranged marriages occur, for example Hindu parents try to find Hindu spouse to their children, or the same applies for moslims. Do people in overall care what your spouse's religion is, in general not that enthusiastically as JW do. There are few religions where person get addressed for plans to marry a non-same-believer or even dedicated a public speech about it. In some religions you might get stoned or throatcut for that, but that is totally another story.

CP

25

"MARRY ONLY IN THE LORD"CRUEL LAW FOR WOMEN

by jam in

i have seen ads for women looking for men that love the lord, that,s ok. you have something in common.

but i have notice that can be a big mistake.. for example, my brother is a widower and have tried dating women in his.

church.

clearpoison

Some reflexions on this, purely independent personal thinking. No statistical data to support these statements.

1. The rule in overall (if assumed to be correct) was not directed to any specific gender. What was power relations between men/women in congregations those days, do not know.

2. Today, at least in places I've visited women are strong, I emphasise, strong majority of witnesses. Thus negative effects of this rule will mostly hit women, by default. Unless one man could have multiple spouses the ratio 2:1, 3:1 etc. will just make it statistically impossible to get it right.

3. For relationbuilding, men are not that eager in most cases. If allowed they are more interested in dipping the sausage in many ponds.

4. Getting older, without having a children around, may not be such problem to a manly man than to a women. Mostly due emotional reasons, but even due some physical limits for having kids, age that is. For men please refer to point 3. and note that they can be fruitful until they die. (even after, if some freezing things have been done).

Yes looking at this day's congregation it seems cruel, as in my opinion women seek for steady relationship and want to have own children, more so than those few men around. But the background when this rule/guidance was written might very well have been totally different, therefore the law as such might not been meant to be difficult to follow. So the question really is how it is implemented today. Funny enough this is not DF offense, even the mixing-relation is very visible in the community. Yes, you will loose your wonderful privileges, the same applies those openly supporting your relation, but it is not DF thing. Some sensibility is obviously around, but is it sensible enough is of course debatable.

CP

37

How many of you have had these in your congregation?

by bottleofwater in

brother smart: the serious brother who thinks that he is an intellectual and believes he is "smart"sister armageddon: the sister who says "armageddon!!!

" after any little thing in the newschase: the little boy who is always running around and crawling under the seats no matter what the parents sayjohnny: the little boy who keeps on leaving his snot on the sides of the bathroom stallbrother squeaky: the one in charge of cleaning who tells everyone what to do, but just stands there and conversessister coquette: the congregation slut... or as close to a slut as she can get... flirting with every brother... oh yeah and she was raised in the "truth"brother borrow: the brother who owes everyone money... and still asks to borrow from othersgreg: the boy or girl whose parents are so restrictive that the kid can't watch anything higher than g-rated moviesstormy: the teenage boy or girl who you could bet does stuff behind the scenes, so to speaki'm just speaking from past memories.

not in all of this anymore.

clearpoison

Actually no, not a single hit on this list and extended answers. I must have been in an odd place.

CP

19

How many used to beat their cars to death in field service?

by life is to short in

jw
friends

ok so this is my second winter out of the crazy religion.. where i live we can get really bad winters and this seems to be another bad year.

we just had a record november for snow fall.

we live in the city and the city snow plowing is not the best to say the least.

clearpoison

Ahh, the car that Mr. Bean hates, groovy.

Winter driving for field service was actually quite productive (counted in time) as you had perfect excuse to drive so slowly, so slowly.

CP

18

Has a local needs talk been given about you?

by Jadeen in

jw
friends

this was briefly mentioned in one of miseryloveselders threads, but i had the honor of a local needs talk pointed at me.

shortly before i got married to my "worldly" husband there was a talk about "marrying only in the lord", "do not become unevenly yoked", blah blah blah.. i wasn't shocked that it was given, i was actually waiting to hear about it.

i was more surprised that they waited until about a month before our wedding day to give it.

clearpoison

Certainly, unfortunatelly I was so dumb, I didn't understood it concerned me.

CP

19

What Are You Paying For Gas Prices In Your Area Now?

by minimus in

jw
friends

the lowest i've seen in a few weeks in my area is $2.85 unleaded, self serve.. i've seen it 30 cents higher and a popular mobil station just off the highway..

clearpoison

6,93USD/gallon 95 unleaded, but this is not US.

CP