We didn't had the mandatory touching part, for short rows plate/glass servant could just reach with plate in front of attendants and they could then nod to show that they have been given the possibility. same for the last cart row and even with the speaker/servant up and down ceremony. The plate and glass was just put in front of you and the correct reaction was not to touch it but nod in kind of an acceptance/recognition.
So there is local variation obviously here.
One interesting detail, the wine used here in most of the memorial locations is the very same wine our main church is using for their communions. It is clearly stated in speech that the wine is commercially produced.
CP