Snakes,
Can I suggest something? Thanks for posting this first of all.
Secondly if you live near a University which has psychology degrees, there is more than likely a student who would love to case study you, and even though they couldn't give you advice, might be able to ask some questions that would help you.
I wish you the best.
PS come to Modern Chat, Jim Knapp who is an ex-jw and a licensed therapist, has sessions for $10.
Anyone that's interested.
PM me for the address.