bafh

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Posts by bafh

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  37

  Elders harassing me

  by raven in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  hi everyone, it has been a while since i've last updated!

  (refer to my previous posts for the full story) here is a quick re-cap: 2 months ago my mother found out that i am living with my boyfriend, she told me i was discovered by an "anonymous" tipper who turned me in for "living in sin".. first of all, that is nearly impossible, the congregation i was in is 100's of miles away from where i currently live.. no one would have ever known i was living with my boyfriend unless i told them, which i never did, i cut off all communication with that congregation in part of my attempted fade which was blown into pieces and discovered.. anyways, my mom tells me if i don't go to the elders and confess like a good little sheep, then she is obligated to tell them.. ( don't see why, i don't even live under her roof ) well i never went to them because why should i?

  so they met with my mother and she told them i live with my boyfriend... let me remind you, this was two months ago.. i was told i was going to be df'd and that was that.

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  bafh

  write them a cease and desist letter.
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  62

  How do you deal with depression?

  by BlackWolf in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm currently going through a bout of depression and my eating disorder has gotten worse.

  ever since my parents actually told me that they are going to kick me out when i turn 18 i've felt kind of hopeless about my life.

  my parents won't take me to the doctor because the psychiatrists won't have my "best interests" aka jw crap in mind, because really that's the root of all my problems.. i'm wondering if any of you guys have any advice with dealing with depression?

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  bafh

  Get a good therapist.
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  26

  So Are Inactives officially SHUNNED?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i've read here that inactives are the same as disfellowshipped, treatment wise.

  is that correct or did i misread it??

  thanks......

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  bafh

  I think this brings it back to us --- our responsibility - if what is important to us is our relationship with our family, then we cannot afford to behave in a manner that makes them view us as a threat.

  My mom is a regular pioneer, a TrueBeliever. Although I have my own opinions about the WT, I am always encouraging and supportive of her. Why? Because that is what allows me to have a relationship with her and more importantly, the rest of my family - including nephews.

  One thing we have to remember, is that we do not have to agree with them in order to be kind. It is easier for some of us than others, I get that. I am also of the opinion that it is not our right to undermine the faith of others. People believe what they choose to believe, and as we all know, if they want to consider more information, it is out there for the having. Some, like my mom, NEED something to believe in. It is my job to respect her judgment and to be loving and supportive to the best of my ability.

  That is what we all want, right? So we have to set the example.

  If we don't want to be viewed as dangerous, then we have to keep our opinions (and maybe our lifestyles) to ourselves. Privacy is a present we give ourselves.

  my 2 cents.
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  26

  So Are Inactives officially SHUNNED?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i've read here that inactives are the same as disfellowshipped, treatment wise.

  is that correct or did i misread it??

  thanks......

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  bafh

  I watched the talks/videos on YouTube. While there was one sidebar comment that equated inactive ones with those who are "unrepentant sinners" - the rest of the talk was the same DF shunning drama. The video though took it pretty far.

  They show a young girl getting DF for sleeping with a Boyfriend and "wanting to do her own thing" - basically being a regular teen/young adult. She gets DFed, and then kicked out of the house. Later, she calls her family - the phone rings while her mom is doing dishes - and the mom is shown struggling - but refusing to answer.

  For me, the line gets drawn when you don't have any contact, even to see about their welfare. It goes beyond what is written (yet again), in my view.

  So, as pointed out by someone else, nothing new.

  There was also another talk about being loving and receptive to those who have been DFd or inactive and have returned. So, again, nothing new.
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  23

  My thoughts on the shunning part at the convention

  by stuckinamovement in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  the wts has gone off the rails and is "unrepentantly" hateful.

  they are blatantly requiring mothers and fathers to disown/hate their own children that they have loved and cared for since birth simply because they don't comply with the orgs demands.

  how is this love?

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  bafh

  Thank you Amnesiano.

  That was very helpful!
• 
  23

  My thoughts on the shunning part at the convention

  by stuckinamovement in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  the wts has gone off the rails and is "unrepentantly" hateful.

  they are blatantly requiring mothers and fathers to disown/hate their own children that they have loved and cared for since birth simply because they don't comply with the orgs demands.

  how is this love?

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  bafh

  My mom is at the convention this weekend. I've been inactive for about 8 or 9 years. What do I need to know about the shunning part? Is there anywhere that I can listen to that section of the program?

  My mom is a TrueBeliever regular Pioneer. So, if there is something from the program that will make her more extreme, I'd like to be aware of it.

  Thanks in advance,

  BAFH
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  98

  Beards - September 2016 Watchtower

  by Listener in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  the issue of whether beards are acceptable or not is addressed in the september 2016 watchtower - well sort of.

  it is as clear as mud as to whether they are allowed in places like australia, usa and britain.. 17. what are some factors that may affect whether a brother wears a beard?17 what about the propriety of brothers wearing a beard?

  the mosaic law required men to wear a beard.

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  bafh

  If God didn't want men to have beards, he wouldn't have created them with beards.

  As a woman, I was always much more concerned about why it wasn't ok for me to wear pants since that has become accepted business attire which is what I was told was always the standards...

  SO glad, I don't have to justify why I don't wear skirts - although my mom (TruBeliever Pioneer) the other day did say, "you're a business woman, I'm surprised you don't wear more skirts." I just told her, that most business women I knew, unless they were very corporate, wore pants, not skirts. She was puzzled.
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  174

  Awake #4/2016: Homosexuality

  by Designer Stubble in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  the new awake is up on jw.orgwith the legalization of gay marriage in many countries, they decided it was time to show: "what does thebible say about homosexuality?

  "does the bible promote prejudice?still, some people would say that the bible promotes prejudice against homosexuals and that those who adhere to itsmoral code are intolerant.

  ‘the bible was written at a time when people were narrow-minded,’ they claim.

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  bafh

  They are careful in this article to make the distinction between behavior and the person - so in theory that works - but as we all know, that is not reflected in how it is actually carried out in most congregations. Although, my mom ( a regular pioneer & true believer) did mention they have an openly gay brother in their congregation and everyone is fine with it. So who knows, ( I live in Portland, after all) - maybe there are pockets of people where they are actually applying some bible principals. :-)
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  12

  David Schafer imitates Steven Lett

  by Gorbatchov in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  friends,.

  watch this jw.org video with "helper" david schafer.

  the topic is care for your parents.

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  bafh

  I happen to know David - pretty well - and he's not imitating any one. That's just his normal manner.

  I was distracted during the video because I kept looking at his hair and wondering how he got it that way and how long it took him every morning to fluff it and keep it standing up like that.

  How much hairspray must he use?
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  18

  Kingdom Hall Attenders: Consider Stopping the Use of Loaded Language

  by OnTheWayOut in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  it's been a long time since i attended, but i understand that many of you still go to the kingdom hall for your various reasons.. a huge thing that helped me in my mentally breaking from their beliefs was to stop using their terms that put you, virtually automatically, into their thought mode.. using terms like "the truth," jw's feel special about themselves and this helps them separate themselves from "the world.

  " by incorporating loaded language, jw's learn not to think, but merely to memorize words and phrases instead of analyzing a situation.. the reasons someone misses meetings is because they are "spiritually weak.

  " they might be involved in "worldly thinking.".

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  bafh

  I like this post. Language is powerful and shapes the way we think. Inside of language we find culture, social norms, concepts that only exist inside that language, etc.

  It is good to change the way we language things because language shapes reality, including the way we think - which then shapes how we feel and behave.

  Nice post OnTheWayOut!