I think maybe we should discuss some of the problematic causes of JW suicide. I'm not speaking of symptoms (ie. depression, ect.) but the lack of non-support when people display or relate these symptoms.
I know of a young brother who used to do volunteer construction work at Bethel from time to time. Upon his last visit, he found that his regular employer would not hold his spot on the job for him. So, in putting "kingdom interests first" (TM) he lost his job and he was the sole caretaker of his elderly mother. Although he was a 'Master Carpenter" as a JW he ,of course, was not part of a union...so no automatic job placement. Anyway, he wasn't accepted for full time Betheldom and with no job, he became depressed. He was given medicine to help treat severe depression by docs, so he was making an effort to get proper treatment. He was also best friends with a MS at the Hall whose new home he had helped finish the basement on.
One lonely night, he hung himself from a tree in one of the state parks.
He did leave a letter, but the elders would not say what was in it. Oddly, the Cong. did attend his funeral as the elders stated the 'medication' was the cause of his suicide and no other factor....so basically, his killing himself was not his fault.
Well, in talking to his best friend's wife one day, the topic of this young brother came up. Basically, what she said is that they were afraid of him because he was 'acting funny'. What did his best friend and wife do? They avoided him like the plague, no speaking, no encouragement, nothing.
See the problem with most JW(s) is ... if a person is not deemed to be able to encourage them, they want nothing to do with that person. We run from just about anyone who may need for US to encourage THEM. We all know its true, that's why so many people pretend they are "fine" when indeed they are not. Everybody is told to find and associate with those folks who can bring up our spirituality and not those who may be in need of help.
Its all about who we can find to encourage us and not who we can find to encourage. We are taught to be very selfish. Selfish in service to ourselves and not to others. We are taught to leave the elders to encourage those in need...but not us. When you think about it, there are very few elders who know how to actually talk to people. Then, we all know what the elders are going to say, and it isn't any words of encouragement. I've come to the conclusion that the majority of JW(s) do not know how to say pleasant and encouraging things to people...as ours is more of a message with unnatural emphasis on doom than on hope.
I do know now, that the MS who was the so-called best friend of the young brother that committed suicide, has not been to a KH in several years. I'm wondering if the guilt of never being there when truly needed caught up to him.
Yet was it the MS...or was it the prevailing attitude of JWs in general? Walk up to anyone in the Hall and tell them things aren't going so good for you today, and watch how fast they run.
I find the longer one stays away from the Hall, the more one tends to actually notice other people and become aware of the obligation to help those in need. As long as one is in the Hall, no one else gets noticed or helped...its really quite odd.
Edited for spelling errors
Edited by - Lieu on 8 July 2002 0:36:37
