Daniel my heart goes out to you bro. Go slow, do not DA yourself. Gradually start your fade away from the KH, try and gently and slowly study with your wife The Truth About The Truth.
DO NOT make it easy for anyone to out you. DO NOT meet with the elders or tell them anything else. Use poor health and/or stress as your main ally. Tell JW people you are "waiting on Jehovah" and/or "throwing your burden on Jehovah."
Go to the Dr. and get a prescription for Xanax or some other drug like that, even if you never use the pills, as you can now tell them that you are on medication from a Dr. and you are trying to reduce your stress and anxiety levels.
You can also ask the elders for the phone line so you can listen in to meetings. Then when your wife goes or to others question you can explain that you listen in and that's all you can handle at the moment.
Over time the whole situation will become more and more clear, that is my experience. PM me anytime if you want to talk.