Posts by confusedstudent

3

Life after bible study

by confusedstudent in

jw
friends

14 years ago

i posted awhile back asking for advice on how to go about quitting my bible study and got a lot of excellent advice from people.. i just wanted to thank all of those people they really and truly helped me.. i am really enjoying my new job and finally making some friends on base.

my marriage is doing immensely better.

we are finally getting out and enjoying japan and going to see the shrines i wouldn't see before (satan) and travel more, i didn't have time before with all the meetings.. at my job i work at the phone company on base and when people sign up i encourage them to go unlisted.

14 years ago

confusedstudent 14 years ago

I posted awhile back asking for advice on how to go about quitting my bible study and got a lot of excellent advice from people.

I just wanted to thank all of those people they really and truly helped me.

I am really enjoying my new job and finally making some friends on base. My marriage is doing IMMENSELY better. We are finally getting out and enjoying Japan and going to see the shrines I wouldn't see before (Satan) and travel more, I didn't have time before with all the meetings.

At my job I work at the phone company on base and when people sign up I encourage them to go unlisted. The base directory is available online and the JW's like to print it out and phone witness since they can't get on base. I met a guy who was concerned because his wife was doing a phone study and offered to talk to her about my experience with the Watchtower.

We are also thinking about having a baby since my husband isn't terrified to get me pregnant because of the blood issue.

In general my life is so much better since I stopped studying. For the first few weeks I was being harassed and developed stress rashes, very distraught but I am better. I still get emails from my bible study teacher. I just got one today that the UN has a section on their website called "Peace and Security"...it actually made me laugh. Then a part of me worried that maybe this is the end and I was wrong. But I am getting better with irrational, programmed thinking. I realize that the Watchtower society was wrong about SOO much, so they can't be the "true religion"- so all of it must be BS.

In general thank you all so much and I am glad I lurked this site for so long before getting the nerve to QUIT.

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38

Is this normal witness behavior?

by confusedstudent in

jw
friends

14 years ago

i quit my bible study a couple days ago after taking a month or two to work up the guts.

have been getting harassing emails/phone calls blah blah blah.

but i got an email today telling me that an unbelieving spouse can be "sanctified" by his believing mate.

14 years ago

confusedstudent 14 years ago

I have told them. I haven't answered even one email/call after me telling them I was quitting my study. They wont stop emailing me though. I blocked them and then they got other people to email me who I haven't even met. Other military wives who managed to convert their husbands and get them out of the military telling me it is possible. They don't understand it isn't my husband it is ME who doesn't want to study. I just haven't been answering and have just kept blocking! I don't want to try to argue or explain myself that will just lead to more contact. It's sad they were my friends but now I actually WANT them to leave me alone if all they are going to talk about is Satan influencing me. A few days ago I was worried I would miss them. But not how they are acting now! I'm so glad I live on base. Otherwise I know I would get them stopping by. I was so stupid to accept a study in the first place. Grrrr.... I wish I could go back in time and get the last year of my life back. I probably spent a third of it at meetings and studies so they could show me off the C.O. and random people.

Link

38

Is this normal witness behavior?

by confusedstudent in

jw
friends

14 years ago

i quit my bible study a couple days ago after taking a month or two to work up the guts.

have been getting harassing emails/phone calls blah blah blah.

but i got an email today telling me that an unbelieving spouse can be "sanctified" by his believing mate.

14 years ago

confusedstudent 14 years ago

It's so strange. I know logically that half the stuff they were trying to teach me was batsh*t crazy. Yet I still have all these strange fears and phobias that I had developed. Yesterday was Easter and I saw some kids hunting for eggs and my first thought was "BABYLON THE GREAT"....and then I realized what I was thinking and just had to laugh at myself. It's like I was programmed to have automatic negative reactions to things. I just have to be patient. My brain will become normal in time.

Link

38

Is this normal witness behavior?

by confusedstudent in

jw
friends

14 years ago

i quit my bible study a couple days ago after taking a month or two to work up the guts.

have been getting harassing emails/phone calls blah blah blah.

but i got an email today telling me that an unbelieving spouse can be "sanctified" by his believing mate.

14 years ago

confusedstudent 14 years ago

They had always kind of skirted around the subject of Armageddon in my "studies". Saying that it is all heart condition and only Jehovah can know and basically if you are a good person Jehovah will probably see that and save you. They have really changed their tune now. They were so friendly and sweet. Now that their please please we are praying for you didn't work I guess they are trying a different tactic. It's scary though I was watching CNN tonight and it was talking about wars and earthquakes and I thought to myself "crap, what if they are right and it is the end and I am going to be destroyed soon!?" I can tell it is going to be awhile before I get my thinking back to normal....

Link

38

Is this normal witness behavior?

by confusedstudent in

jw
friends

14 years ago

i quit my bible study a couple days ago after taking a month or two to work up the guts.

have been getting harassing emails/phone calls blah blah blah.

but i got an email today telling me that an unbelieving spouse can be "sanctified" by his believing mate.

14 years ago

confusedstudent 14 years ago

I quit my bible study a couple days ago after taking a month or two to work up the guts. Have been getting harassing emails/phone calls blah blah blah. But I got an email today telling me that an unbelieving spouse can be "sanctified" by his believing mate. And now that I "know the truth" (I had a meeting to become an unbaptized publisher tomorrow so I had been studying for awhile) I am going to have to realize I will be responsible for my husband being destroyed at Armageddon and do I really want that on my conscience? IS THIS NORMAL!? How can they think they will get me to change my mind with this? My husband however thinks this entire situation is hilarious. I'm glad he has such a great sense of humor...

Link

89

Want to quit Bible study

by confusedstudent in

jw
friends

14 years ago

hi i was just looking for some advice.

i have been studying with the jw's for over a year now, and attended 2 memorials and the district/assembly conventions.

at first, and up until very recently i truly believed what i was learning was the truth.

14 years ago

confusedstudent 14 years ago

On to get on base in a foreign country I have to actually walk down to the gate, take them to the pass office. They have to show their IDs, passports, drivers license, other documents. Get a picture taken. I have to sign like 4 papers. And then they have to have their car searched. And someone has to sponsor them for their day pass (meaning if they do anything out of line then I am responsible). It's much different than getting on a base in America! I just have to show my ID there! The JW I was studying with here only came on base once and I think was freaked out because we had always met at Starbucks after that. It was too much hassle for me to get her on base even when I wanted her here! So I am not worried about them showing up at my door. Even if another person let them on base if they showed up at my door they would be banned permanently, preaching is not allowed here in any form.

Link

89

Want to quit Bible study

by confusedstudent in

jw
friends

14 years ago

hi i was just looking for some advice.

i have been studying with the jw's for over a year now, and attended 2 memorials and the district/assembly conventions.

at first, and up until very recently i truly believed what i was learning was the truth.

14 years ago

confusedstudent 14 years ago

Luckily I start a full time job working on base next week. And I have been volunteering with the American Red Cross to help with relief operations for the Tsunami. The JWs told me this wasn't a good idea though because it was too worldly (plus the Red Cross does blood drives). That was another thing that made me realize this was a false religion. I just couldn't rationalize in my mind how making care baskets and doing fundraisers for children without homes in northeast Japan was a bad thing! My husband is so happy, he actually proposed to me all over again yesterday. It was adorable. I marked all of the JW people who have been emailing me as spam. And now I no longer see those messages. I tried to explain as nicely as a could but if all I am going to be getting is guilt trips 24/7 I don't want to talk to them. It's sad I remember when my "teacher" told me she "loved me for who I am" one time. That was obviously a lie, if who I am is not someone who wants to be a Jehovah's Witness I am influenced by Satan. It is just hard to realize I wasn't really ever a real friend of theirs anyway. I am looking forward to making more friends on base though. I will be okay. I have so much admiration for everyone who was born-in and all their families are Witnesses. I could not imagine the strength it would take to get out of that!

Link

89

Want to quit Bible study

by confusedstudent in

jw
friends

14 years ago

hi i was just looking for some advice.

i have been studying with the jw's for over a year now, and attended 2 memorials and the district/assembly conventions.

at first, and up until very recently i truly believed what i was learning was the truth.

14 years ago

confusedstudent 14 years ago

And as far as actually physically moving I am the military's property and can only move when they tell me too. But being on base provides a certain amount of privacy and protection you can't truly get otherwise. I'm lucky.

Link

89

Want to quit Bible study

by confusedstudent in

jw
friends

14 years ago

hi i was just looking for some advice.

i have been studying with the jw's for over a year now, and attended 2 memorials and the district/assembly conventions.

at first, and up until very recently i truly believed what i was learning was the truth.

14 years ago

confusedstudent 14 years ago

Well I live on a military base so the likelihood of them getting to my actual house is nonexistant. I am considering getting my cell phone number changed at this point though. I have other email addresses that I will just have to start using more. This is ridiculous. Especially them giving out my phone number! I am restricted with the phone company though for my house phone, but it's a base number so the Japanese dubs wouldn't be able to call anyway-it's an American number and wont accept it. It really is just the email and cell phone. I will have to go in to the cell phone store to get numbers blocked because I can't read Japanese! But it still is worth it though. It is just SOO annoying. I have never been so glad to live on a military base in my life.

Link

89

Want to quit Bible study

by confusedstudent in

jw
friends

14 years ago

hi i was just looking for some advice.

i have been studying with the jw's for over a year now, and attended 2 memorials and the district/assembly conventions.

at first, and up until very recently i truly believed what i was learning was the truth.

14 years ago

confusedstudent 14 years ago

I have been getting emails ALL day. Phone calls that I haven't answered too. Mostly about apostate websites and how Satan is trying to lead me astray. Also about my husband needs to be saved by the truth and I am his only hope and "don't you want the best for him?" Mainly just telling me I am being influenced by Satan. Also a lot of stories about military wives who perservered even though their husbands beat them every time they went to a meeting. And "I hope you will make it to convention tomorrow?" I was so nice and direct about it. I WISH TO DISCONTINUE MY STUDY. THANK YOU. Why can't they leave it alone? I was super polite and nice and grateful. If they think bugging me at all hours of the day is going to get me to change my mind they are crazy! They also have a bunch of other military wives who are witnesses contacting me with how thankful they are that they didn't get discouraged their husbands are now witnesses blah blah blah blah, I didn't give them permission to give out my email! Also a bunch of "I have been crying all night I am so worried about you I love you I just want what is best for you". Dang I am glad I got out now I can't imagine how hard it would be if I had been made an unbaptized publisher on tuesday!

They are trying to make me feel guilty like I have done something personally to them. You can't join a religion just because it will hurt someone's feelings if you don't. That is a ridiculous ploy.

On a brighter note my husband and I went out to Chili's to celebrate and had a perfectly lovely day doing almost nothing. Much better than the convention!

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