I DID IT! I emailed my teacher and told her I wished to discontinue my studies. I simply told her I do not wish to become an unbaptized publisher or get baptized. I said I respect her too much to waste her time since I do not plan on progressing. She emailed me back and said I must be going through some tough times and gave me scriptures to read but that she hopes to hear from me and see me again soon. She did say however I would never be successful or find happiness in marriage or in life with Jehovah. My bible teacher from the states wrote me THE LONGEST email ever with tons of watchtower quotes, etc... about how Satan is leading me astray, etc... And I do feel bad. But mostly for accepting a study in the beginning. I do feel like I wasted their time, but in my own defense I was never told at the beginning of the study that the goal was to get me to be a baptized witness. They just said they wanted to discuss the bible with me. So I feel like I was misled also. I am glad I did this now instead of waiting until after I became an unbaptized publisher and trying to "fade". The guilt trips seem endless though but I will probably just delete their emails before reading them and I do have caller ID. My husband is proud of me though, and I am proud of myself. I am such a mild mannered soft-spoken person I rarely speak out or stick up for myself. I FEEL SO MUCH BETTER!!!
confusedstudent
JoinedPosts by confusedstudent
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89
Want to quit Bible study
by confusedstudent inhi i was just looking for some advice.
i have been studying with the jw's for over a year now, and attended 2 memorials and the district/assembly conventions.
at first, and up until very recently i truly believed what i was learning was the truth.
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89
Want to quit Bible study
by confusedstudent inhi i was just looking for some advice.
i have been studying with the jw's for over a year now, and attended 2 memorials and the district/assembly conventions.
at first, and up until very recently i truly believed what i was learning was the truth.
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confusedstudent
My teacher and everyone at the hall knows I am going to be working on base and none of them have said anything about it, this is the first I have heard of that. I know for a fact of some sisters who have worked for base childcare and still were publishers. Some sisters have even suggested my filing under military spouse preference for a job on base (they are active publishers and military wives). Has everyone I have ever met just ignored this rule or is it different if you are married to someone in the military? I have to live on base since I am overseas, I shop on base, use base services.... I just find it odd nobody has ever said anything about this before and have in fact been encouraged to search for a job on base by active sisters who are military wives.
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89
Want to quit Bible study
by confusedstudent inhi i was just looking for some advice.
i have been studying with the jw's for over a year now, and attended 2 memorials and the district/assembly conventions.
at first, and up until very recently i truly believed what i was learning was the truth.
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confusedstudent
The one in Japan is. My old teacher in California was not though.
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89
Want to quit Bible study
by confusedstudent inhi i was just looking for some advice.
i have been studying with the jw's for over a year now, and attended 2 memorials and the district/assembly conventions.
at first, and up until very recently i truly believed what i was learning was the truth.
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confusedstudent
I know this weekend is the convention. I called my teacher earlier today and told her I wasn't going. I already went to this exact same convention in California in December. I told her I wanted to spend the last weekend I had before work with my husband. She wasn't pleased. I was confused because I have already gone to this convention! She said it is good to go again for fellowship but I said I need to spend a weekend with my husband. And my teacher is actually only about 30. Her husband is very young also, which confused me because I thought all the annointed were very elderly and about to kick the bucket.
I am going to be working on base. She knows this. There were several sisters in California who were married to military members who were still publishers. I wonder why they allow it for them. She didn't seem to be deterred in trying to get me out in the ministry by this fact. I wonder what they would expect me to do for a job otherwise, I dont' speak Japanese. It is hard enough for a military wife to get a job on base even!
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89
Want to quit Bible study
by confusedstudent inhi i was just looking for some advice.
i have been studying with the jw's for over a year now, and attended 2 memorials and the district/assembly conventions.
at first, and up until very recently i truly believed what i was learning was the truth.
-
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confusedstudent
Thank you all so much for your posts. I HIGHLY doubt I am going to change the minds of the women I study with. One is married to a Deacon and the other is married to one of the ANNOINTED. I just have to be honest with them. I am going to call tomorrow and tell my Bible teacher from the states (the one I am cloer to) how I feel. That I have too many doubts and consider baptism to be a big step, and the ministry and am not ready and never see myself being ready so I am discontinuing my studies. I am going to thank her for everything she has done though and tell her I still would like to be friends. Then the ball is in her court if she still wants to have contact with me. For the lady who is currently doing my study (wife of the annointed) I am just going to email her. I like her a lot also but am not as close to her and she is so stubborn! I feel like I can't even ask a question in my study with her. My last study I was telling her how I feel closest to Jehovah in prayer. She then cautioned me that I am not relying on The Governing Body enough. She said Jehovah is our father but the Organization is our mother and I need to go through my "mother" to get to my father. How weird! I feel like just a simple email will be best with her. "Please cancel my interview with the Elders. After careful consideration, research, and prayer I have decided not to pursue my studies or being an unbaptized publisher". I will express how even though I am grateful for everything I have learned it is just simply not the religion for me. My husband is home from work tomorrow so it will be nice to have him around because I am sure I will cry a lot. But I will feel SO much better afterwards. I respect these women far too much to lead them on, even though I feel like fading away would be easier. But I have tried that at different points in my study and it just does NOT work. I really do need a clean break. I've talked to my husband and he is so helpful. I'm glad I have him here. I will let everyone know how it goes.
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89
Want to quit Bible study
by confusedstudent inhi i was just looking for some advice.
i have been studying with the jw's for over a year now, and attended 2 memorials and the district/assembly conventions.
at first, and up until very recently i truly believed what i was learning was the truth.
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confusedstudent
Thank you all for your replies and for the webpages. You all have given me a lot to think about. I know that I will probably lose the friendships I have made and I acknowledge this and am prepared for it. It doesn't make it hurt any less though. I loved both of these women with all my heart.
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89
Want to quit Bible study
by confusedstudent inhi i was just looking for some advice.
i have been studying with the jw's for over a year now, and attended 2 memorials and the district/assembly conventions.
at first, and up until very recently i truly believed what i was learning was the truth.
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confusedstudent
To Chris,
My problem is I did come into studying at a very vulnerable point in my life.. I have no family of my own, was raised in the foster system mother on drugs etc....I met them when I was a newly wed living in a place where I knew nobody. My husband was deployed and I was pregnant with twins. I ended up miscarrying in my second trimester and my bible teacher was the woman who drove me to the emergency room, I had nobody else I could think of calling. My husband was in Iraq and I knew nobody at my new base. The Sisters I have studied with have become what I thought to be very good friends of mine. And I can say now in retrospect I relied too much on them emotionally. I am sure about what I have to do, I can not become a witness. I guess what I am really asking for is a way to get out of this gracefully and without hurting feelings. In the beginning though I truly did like what I was hearing and was believing it, it's only after learning their more "interesting" practices that I have realized this. So please don't judge me, I am in a tight place right now emotionally and was just looking for support and advice on how to procede with this. At one point I really did want to get baptized. Silly me.
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89
Want to quit Bible study
by confusedstudent inhi i was just looking for some advice.
i have been studying with the jw's for over a year now, and attended 2 memorials and the district/assembly conventions.
at first, and up until very recently i truly believed what i was learning was the truth.
-
-
confusedstudent
I have been thinking about the second strategy. I live on a military base in Japan. I started studying in California and moved here with my husband and PICKED IT BACK UP AGAIN LIKE AN IDIOT! But, at that time I hadn't gotten deep into the "study" and realized how creepy it was. Since I do live on a military base though they can NOT stop by my house ever. They are not allowed. And I am starting a full time job next week so I will be extremely busy. I have been unemployed up until now. I am thinking about just telling them I am just simply too busy-it won't be a lie. If they keep pressuring me I figure I will say to them it is probably best I don't continue my studies since my schedule doesn't seem to allow for all the time it takes ot be an active witness. My teacher seems to be a master at guilt trips though. Stuff about how all Brothers and Sisters are able to fit in more than I do and if I just try harder Jehovah will reward my efforts. But my husband has been working 12 hour days 7 days a week in support of the earthquake relief efforts here and the few times he has had off I have ran off to meetings because I feel guilty. That was when I really realized this can't be "the truth". The "truth" is RUINING my marriage.
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89
Want to quit Bible study
by confusedstudent inhi i was just looking for some advice.
i have been studying with the jw's for over a year now, and attended 2 memorials and the district/assembly conventions.
at first, and up until very recently i truly believed what i was learning was the truth.
-
-
confusedstudent
Hi I was just looking for some advice. I have been studying with the JW's for over a year now, and attended 2 memorials and the district/assembly conventions. At first, and up until very recently I truly believed what I was learning was the truth. As I have gotten further into my studies though it is seeming a little creepy. I try to bring up questions and doubts in my studies but it is hard because there is only one right answer- quoting the book I am reading from. I have a meeting on tuesday to see about becoming an unbaptized publisher. I am pretty convinced right now that this is not the religion for me. The blood issue specifically, and my husband is in the military (I started studying when he was deployed and I was very lonely and POOF a sister came knocking at my door!) How should I go about quitting my study? Everyone is expecting me to get baptized and I just CAN'T. Even though lots of what they have to say is appealing with the Watchtower it is either all or nothing and I don't agree with all of it, even though I do agree with a lot of it. The sisters who have done my study have become very very good friends of mine and it makes me sad because I have a feeling once I tell them I am through with studying they wont want to be my friends anymore. I don't know how I got this far into it I was just trying to pass the time and get some socialization and now I am about to go out in the ministry. How do I stop this trainwreck? I would like to just fade away and get too busy but they just don't leave me alone and always make me feel SO guilty when I can't make it to things that I go out of guilt instead of spending time with my husband like I should. HELP?
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89
Want to quit Bible study
by confusedstudent inhi i was just looking for some advice.
i have been studying with the jw's for over a year now, and attended 2 memorials and the district/assembly conventions.
at first, and up until very recently i truly believed what i was learning was the truth.
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confusedstudent
I also have been attending meetings semi-regularly.