Posts by Marilyn

36

I Find it all interesting!

by glode in

jw
friends

before i startm let mejust apologizein advance ifmy spacekey doesnt work properly!

!damn keyboard!

anyways, i have been lookingthru theposts here for several weeks, i findmany of theopinions well thought out.

Glode, Obviouly the d'fing thing is a sore point with me. We were caught up in the 1981 global cleansing which occurred when the infamous Ray Franz (nephew of Fred Franz was disfed for opposing views). We didn't know about him or any of this at the time. We lived on the other side of the world but the WTS was being super sensitive to any who wanted to leave. Hence we were disfed. I can cite many many cases since then where people did what we did and were not harrassed. Basically though - this gives you some insight into the level of God's spirit involved in the way the Organisation works. It's just a big corporation that makes loads of mistakes. Only it does more damage at grass roots level. Individuals don't matter. They never ever revisit mistakes or injustices. They just pretend they don't exist or like I said before they take the attitude that it will all come out in the wash (Jehovah will make it all right one day......). Of course in the real word - if mistakes are proven - people are held to account. None of this helps me though as I've watch 20 yrs go excluded from a family that was once very close (before we became JWs that is)

Marilyn (Mazza)

28

I got my nerve up, gonna try this again!

by LostMyReligion in

jw
friends

i first posted to this board as "truman" about 2 months ago.

it was a time of deep depression, confusion, fear, and paranoia for me, as i had just 3 weeks before discovered that everything i had believed for 27 years was only a pipe dream.. everyone was very welcoming, but after only a few posts, i got so afraid i had to stop.

i was fearful of revealing too much, being somehow discovered, and of the possibility of saying the wrong thing, incurring the ire of my betters here.

Marilyn

Dear LMR, I don't post much but I've been active on the internet for about 6 yrs. You must be about my age (I was baptised in 1971 aged 18, so I'm two years older than you). I didn't last as long as you and became very disillusioned by Dec 79' just after my second child was born. My time in had been very productive though. I'd rallied my family into joining and becoming active, converted my boy friend, and a girl I worked with along with my school friend neighbor. They all remain 'in' to this day. My husband and I were disfellowshipped in 1981 for apostasy, because we no longer believed (it was a little unfair as we'd quietly slipped away). Our freedom from the WTS has been wonderful, especially as we've been able to raise our two children sensibly and without the chains of control and ignorance. I lost my family though and that has been a cruel and harsh consequence of walking away. My parents have tried to keep both sides happy, and they have had some horrific health problems which I put down to the stress of their intolerable situation. It's inconceivable to me that a religion can be the cause of so much pain. Had I not see it for myself I would never have believed it.

Your story touched my heart. I have read so many stories such as yours. They are all equally tragic. I don't want to depress you, I just want you to know that you are in a 'great crowd' that has walked this path before you. None of us have found it easy, yet of all the stories I've read and people I've chatted to, none are sorry to be out. We can lament the time we lost, but we must be glad of the time we have left to live a normal, happy and productive life. I don't think any of us will truly get over believing we were special members of God's chosen few, but the company of wonderful people who know how it feels is a compensation I had never anticipated. This last 6 yrs of meeting others (in cyber space and in the flesh) has helped to take some of the edge off the sadness. I really hope you get as much pleasure from our cyber space buddies as I have done.

all the best to you
Marilyn

82

Has anyone felt like leaving God altogether?

by lookingnow22 in

jw
friends

i know that the answer is yes, but it would help me to hear your sentiments on this.

.

after you decided that the wbts, and thus jw's were not god's chosen earthly organization did you feel like you wanted to leave and forget god altogether?.

Marilyn

Actually MD, for those that believe in it, prayer is as good as meditiation, which is apparently very good for us. I have never thought I was very smart - but it astounds me that people like you and JH and AF and lot's of others I have enormous respect for, all took a while to work out about God being a con. My loss of faith in the JWs and God was pretty well simultaneous. I could see the jw thing not working, and I guess there was a degree of the 'where else' syndrome - but only inconjuction with 'why look eslewhere'? I guess I stayed in a long time while I worked out a lot of things. Either that or there really is a god - cause like I told you I'm pretty dumb!!!! I've asked a lot of people in the 20+ yrs I've been out - especially academics and people of science but the answers are always vague and fuzzy. No substance. For years I thought someone would eventually say something that would turn my mind back to believing. But they had to say something logical and ingisghtful. It hasn't happened yet. Btw I don't think the washing powder from Amway would have been worth putting up with all those Amway drones!! EEK!

Marilyn

9

Today in Rotten History

by Marilyn in

jw
friends

today in rotten history we live in a slightly mad world .

may 24 1997 wade thomas poyner, a prominent jehovah's witness in woodland, washington, is arrested for a lewd incident involving a preteen boy.

while not charged with that crime, poyner was charged for a summer 1991 rape of a 6 year old boy, and is suspected in nine other incidents involving preteen boys.

Marilyn

TODAY IN ROTTEN HISTORY
we live in a slightly mad world

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

May 24 1997
Wade Thomas Poyner, a prominent Jehovah's Witness in Woodland, Washington, is arrested for a lewd incident involving a preteen boy. While not charged with that crime, Poyner was charged for a Summer 1991 rape of a 6 year old boy, and is suspected in nine other incidents involving preteen boys. Gotta love them J.W.'s.

-rotten.com

25

I Look Death in the Eye

by COMF in

jw
friends

i have always had trouble breathing.

in track i was great for a quick burst of speed in the 50 yard dash, but couldn't move enough air in and out to keep myself going for the longer runs like the 330. i had sleep apnea really bad, with the classic symptoms where i stopped breathing for a while and then suddenly snorted myself awake gasping for breath.

for most of my life, surgery wasn't an option due to my jw lifestyle and employment choices (cleaning business = no insurance).

Marilyn

Comf, Your sharing your experience drew us in to the clarity of it all . I wonder if your jotting it down here was an attempt to keep hold of the intensity of the insights you captured just briefly? We all live precariously and yet we carry on as if all the unimportant things really matter. I've had glimpses of the reality, like when David's father died. A wonderful person was no more. For a brief moment everything seemed meaningless. Yet life went on and I quickly forgot. We pause just briefly and then we mentally gather up our emotional baggage and continued carrying its heavy burden where ever we go. It's almost uncanny the way we forget the important things prefering to endulge ourselves in pointless, often self created problems as if we will be around forever and have time for petty hatred and intolerance. If only we could get hold of the important things and keep hold of them for a bit longer than the duration of our threatened existence's .............

Many thanx for the reminder,
Marilyn

33

The difference between a JW and an IDIOT

by Focus in

jw
friends

.

Marilyn

Do all idiots have selective idiocy? Jw's can be (but not necessarily) very bright on any other subject but religion. As a general rule, it's only religion that brings out the idiocy in them! Therefore I believe there is a difference between jws and an idiot.

Marilyn

18

Governing Body Exit Doors

by Skimmer in

jw
friends

consider the exit doors for the governing body.. we know that there was no authoritative governing body before 1976, so i will limit the scope of this thought to the time since then.

how do members leave the governing body?.

exit door number one: death; taken by most.. exit door number two: disgrace; taken by a couple.. exit door number three: triumph; taken by raymond franz.. has it ever been the case where a governing body member has left because of senility?

Marilyn

:::::::::he dribbled on and on in his prayer, repeating the same phrase over and over again, for half hour.

That was a pretty well standard prayer where I came from!!!! But thinking about it, premature senility goes hand in hand with giving up rational thought.

Marilyn

17

To Rick on H2O...

by Simon in

jw
friends

i just posted this on h2o and though i'd put a copy here as well.... hi rick,.

i just thought it may be appropriate for me to express my appreciation for your site and what you have accomplished over the last few years and i'm sure will continue to do.. like many others, h2o was one of the sites which helped to open my eyes to the watchtower society and beliefs and practices of jehovahs witnesses and realise that there were things seriously wrong which a lot of other people saw as well - it wasn't just limited to our local congregation.. i did participate on h2o occasionally as caliban but never really kept up-to-date with all the posters, personalities and what was going on between them.. the reason i decided to create an alternative forum, www.jehovahs-witness.com, was because at the time it appeared that the very pro-jw community was well served by witnet and the anti-jw's had h2o but that it may have been a bit too much for the 'mildly curious' jw to visit.

my idea was to have a forum more like witnet which would gradually allow more open discussion than was allowed there without being too off putting to many as a way of introducing the issues to them more gently.. i'm sure your views and standpoints have changed over the years and mine have too.

Marilyn

Simon, I'm a refugee from H20. When the old site shut down I found the new site was terribly slow and I quickly gave up trying to follow it. This site is much more user friendly for me personally. I have been out for 20 years - d'fd for apostasy in 1981, even though I'd never read any anti jw literature or knew any others who had left. Just want to point out how unreasonable they were even 20 yrs ago. I've lost most of my family to the Org., and I find it really helpful, even 20 yrs down the track, to have somewhere warm and friendly, where I can touch base and get my spirit refreshed from those who've been there, done that. Thank you for this site.

kind regards
Marilyn

30

Field Service, Anyone?

by Farkel in

jw
friends

the human brain is a non-stop chattering machine.

it is constantly evaluating, making decisions and judgments.

there is not a human being alive that isn't an abject hypocrite nearly every day.

Marilyn

What is remarkable is that we/they were/are pursuaded to do Witnessing, when we/they all hated/hate it so much. Your post brought back loads of miserable memories....... shudder!! I just loathed Witnessing. One morning I got *reprimanded* for saying "I'd gotten rid of x number of magerzines that day. Placed sister, PLACED!!!!

Marilyn

25

File lawsuit or not?

by TR in

jw
friends

when i moved my family after leaving the jehoagies schmitnesses, i changed my phone number, and made sure it was unlisted.

little did i know that i would soon be receiving a call out of the blue from a jw.. now, this was a woman that i had worked with at one time and we were pretty good friends, so a few years later, when she called, i was kind of glad to hear from her.

the problem was, how did she get my phone number.

Marilyn

Sounds like the kind of thing they would scream blue murder about if it happened to them! But of course we have to remember that they are special and we have to make allowances for them cause they're different and God's
s people an'all. If I were you I'd forget about this as all you will do is reinforce their matyr complex!

Marilyn