i'm wondering if any of you ex elders ever felt embarrassed or awkward about having to stick your noses into other peoples business did it ever seem like that to you, or were you of the mind that you were a necessary part of the lives of the flock?
.
marilyn
Dear Dazed, I just answered your post about squeaky clean. You have been to hell and back by the sound of things. I'm so glad you have found this place. I think you have a lot to say and I hope you don't stop until you feel a little bit better. I hope your life is better now? It surely couldn't be worse??
Marilyn
i'm wondering if the majority here were seriously conservative squeaky clean dubs?
i took the whole thing very seriously.
there seems to be such a fun element here - i can't imagine everyone being those dull folk all decked out in their wt uniform with accompanying plastic expressions.. marilyn
Dazed, Tell me you are Australian! You sound very Australian. I'm real sorry about the Dickhead you got saddled with. The Organisation favors guys like that.
When we were dubs we had a monthly account with the booze shop. We couldn't pass a civil word to each other Sunday nites after the conventions finished - not until we'd both swilled down at least 2 glasses of wine each. I started drinking because of the religion - I can actually live without it now. Yaaaaa!
Marilyn
has any dude here ever had any advertised results from 30 days' worth of longitude capsules for penis lengthening (lengthening of 26%).
i just saw their ad on tv and of course it sounds too good to be true, but why pass up something if it really works?
( http://www.longitudecapsules.com and http://www.cpnutritionals.com).
I think we have to consider what is really important here (brothers). Is it length or width that counts? I thought it was "long and thin goes too far in - short and thick does the trick"!
Look I didn't start this discussion. I will not be held accountable - I am Australian after all!
Marilyn
i'm wondering if any of you ex elders ever felt embarrassed or awkward about having to stick your noses into other peoples business did it ever seem like that to you, or were you of the mind that you were a necessary part of the lives of the flock?
.
marilyn
Picosito, I'm not at all surprised to hear answers like yours. I also think people should learn to sort out their own problems. If advice is asked for then certainly it should be offered, but questioning all the gory details of an adultery must be abhorant to a well rounded individual. The situation with the guy having the affair on the business trip must have been beyond belief - the kinda thing you prefer not to know. Of course the obvious advice to the wife would have been to seek therapy for her low self esteme - which was probably the reason she married the jerk in the first place. But what elder is going to give advice like that ??
Just2laws, I know that some elders really get off on the authority given them by the WTS. I know one (a relative) who just revels in it. It's usually men who are inadequate as human beings, and therefore being a big important elder gives them the status they can't get any where else. However I'm sure that some 'brothers' just get hauled into the job and cringe constantly at the indignaties of Eldership. <sigh>.
Marilyn
i'm wondering if any of you ex elders ever felt embarrassed or awkward about having to stick your noses into other peoples business did it ever seem like that to you, or were you of the mind that you were a necessary part of the lives of the flock?
.
marilyn
I'm wondering if any of you ex elders ever felt embarrassed or awkward about having to stick your noses into other peoples business Did it ever seem like that to you, or were you of the mind that you were a necessary part of the lives of the flock?
Marilyn
this is a first time for me discussing this with anyone other than my husband or very close friends.
bear with me, this is years of confusion.
please do not judge this to be negative to jw.. i am 29 & was raised a jw from the time i was born.
Francois, following on from your comments - how often do we see parents either on current affairs programs or in movies (Holy Smoke was one) who are panicked about their kids getting involved in a cult. Of course it can be the other way around and the affect is the same. Loved ones panic because when their family members get involved in cults they inevitably take second place... some times tenth place. Their loved ones become remote or distant. Besides all the rot they expound, which is annoying in itself, I think it's the loss of the close bond that is so frightening.
Shan, my sister's daughter is in the same position as you. She is only 18 and raised in a very one eyed witness family - her father is presiding overseer. I know what you are getting at because I've seen the same thing with my niece. I even wanted to make a home for her with us but that would have emotionally destroyed my sister who is still hopeful of getting her daughter back into the religion. My niece left home first time at age 16. It breaks my heart to see her situation. She has a humble job and lives alone in a small, cold rented flat. She is still so young and she has no roll models to learn from. If she tries to draw close to her mother, it eventually comes back to *the truth* and intolerence over her life style. Yet where else can she turn when she is lonely or sick or when she's made a botch up of things? It's so tuff to be alone at such a young age. It's a tragedy! My kids are still living at home at ages 24 and 22 - and if anything I stiffle them with over-protection and concern. I'm begining to learn that my way isn't all that useful either. Life is very complicated and even if you had 'normal' parents who gave you what you wanted - it probably wouldn't be as perfect as you imagine it would be.
I think I might have some useful advice for you. It's based on my own situation of having been disfellowshipped for apostasy over 20 yrs ago. I love my parents very much and I've continued to love them thru thick and thin. I believe you have to continue showing them that even without Jehovah's Witnesses you are a good, loving, helpful, concerned daughter who is always there for them. Even if they aren't always there for you - you will be surprised that after a few years of doing the right thing by them, they will catch on to what a truly wonderful daughter you are. You know I've been wishing my parents happy birthday for 20 years and guess what? The last couple of years it's been recipicated! They have seen how concerned I've always been for their welfare and how generous I am with them and basically I'm a better person to them than their JW offspring.
It takes endless patience to do this. I never knew I could be so patient. Even though I'm an athiest I've always considered that scripture in Corinthians which says Love Never Fails. It hasn't failed me - I've recieved back rich emotional dividens from my parents - though it's not always been smooth sailing.
One other thing. The fact that you are concerned about your relationship shows that your parents did ok by you. They must have been good enough parents to instill a strong family bond in you. They will always put the religion first because they don't know any better - but I feel that if you go about it right, you can be part of their life and remain true to yourself.
I so wish you well.
marilyn
i'm wondering if the majority here were seriously conservative squeaky clean dubs?
i took the whole thing very seriously.
there seems to be such a fun element here - i can't imagine everyone being those dull folk all decked out in their wt uniform with accompanying plastic expressions.. marilyn
Whoops, I forgot the drinking! But that was within the marriage arrangment, so even that was ok, right?
Cygnus, my boy friend and I used to fool around, but then after we converted we (eventually) stopped. What an unhealthy decision!
Marilyn
i'm wondering if the majority here were seriously conservative squeaky clean dubs?
i took the whole thing very seriously.
there seems to be such a fun element here - i can't imagine everyone being those dull folk all decked out in their wt uniform with accompanying plastic expressions.. marilyn
Ozzie, it's an interesting point you make. I am no prude, but I'm still quite conservative in my attitudes. I haven't done anything I feel quilty about in years - damnit!!!
Alan F. That JulieF is a wicked, wicked woman. You had to know what you were getting yourself in to? Me thinks you two are well suited!
i'm wondering if the majority here were seriously conservative squeaky clean dubs?
i took the whole thing very seriously.
there seems to be such a fun element here - i can't imagine everyone being those dull folk all decked out in their wt uniform with accompanying plastic expressions.. marilyn
I'm wondering if the majority here were seriously conservative squeaky clean dubs? I know I was. I took the whole thing very seriously. There seems to be such a fun element here - I can't imagine everyone being those dull folk all decked out in their WT uniform with accompanying plastic expressions.
Marilyn
well ladies and laddies,.
my favs are root bear and ginger ale.
however, only vernor's ginger ale - by far the best.
I'm sure she was thinking of your health larc. Obviously someone has to!!
Marilyn
