in october of 2000, i faded away from the watchtower.
like most people, i have family and friends who are jw's (including my wife and parents).
fading is generally the best method for people in that situation.
This is an incredible post.
A truly cerebral look at how to fight the Watchtower and win with minamal collateral damage and win.
I suspect they secretly love it when people go all ragey and fire off on them. It makes them look like true prophets and cements their position with still in friends and family.
Indifference is their biggest worry and concern. You would strike fear in to the hearts of the GB if you had a big enough platform and could get this post out there.
via reddit.
here are the morning program highlights.
will update for the afternoon once it's all over.
15,000 people in attendance. I would love to know how many actually believe all of that in their heart of hearts and how many are just going along.
so here an update on my current situation, in a nutshell i've been trying to quietly fade for the past 5 months.. well, my mom somehow found out that i am currently fading and that i live with my boyfriend (for more info on this check my previous posts) i told her yes i live with him and yes i no longer want to be a jw.
anyways, yesterday she met my boyfriend.. awkward.
and after lunch she pulled me aside to tell me that the po came up to her (he was part of my jc when i was reproved) he said to her "someone came to me and said - i cannot say who so they will remain anonymous- but that your daughter is living with someone" my mom confirmed and apparently he told her that i have one week to confess this, and if i don't my parents are obligated to tell them everything.. what kind of nonsense is that?
How long ago were you reproved?
Was it in the same Hall your publisher record cards are still in?
Is that your moms Hall?
These are not questions I expect an answer to but they will be factors in what happens in your situation.
Since it has only been a 5 month fade I do not think that is long enough to get you off their radar. Five years maybe or even half of that.
You have gotten good advice about what to do above so I will just add that I am sorry you feel so undone by this. I am sorry that at what should be a happy time in your relationship, you have this to deal with. You have my sympathy.
maybe it's time for a less serious thread .
i have just finished watching dirty dancing ( again ) .
what is your feel good movie , the one that makes you smile and cry happy tears ?
My favorite is Chocolat
Some of you have mentioned movies I havent seen yet, so thanks for that.
Awesome thread jhine, your movie choice is one of my favs too.
(nobody puts baby in the corner.....)
my name is jimbo, i'm almost 20 years old, and i live in southern california.
here we go, here's my story (i feel like i'm in an aa meeting haha):.
i was invited by a friend who, looking back, i could tell was buttering me up for months so she can lunge on the perfect opportunity to invite me to a meeting.
Hi DmD ,
Interresing reading your process and thinking along the way. Thank you for sharing it. I never tire of hearing how people arrive at the obvious conclusion that the JWs are seriously flawed.
As for sayings or words they use I dont like, I rhink the word "we" comes to mind.
Not that it is "their" word, I just dont like the way they have co-opted it -
"surely 'we' know that" (insert crazy belief here).
We do? Really? How exactly do we know that?
Verbiage in place of facts. gah!
is this something they've asked them to do?
cart displays in front of their homes?
my mom is only in her mid 60s so i'm quite sure this is not an issue of mental illness.. the only illness she's suffering from is boredom since she's refused to work for years now.
So sorry you have to deal with this Tempest.
I would call an elder in her Hall.
The carts are for public witnessing. They are checked out by publishers (kind of like a library book)
Tell the elder it is against your wishes on your private property.
Tell him it is against zoning rules (if applicable)
Tell him this is a courtesy call and you are calling the Org in one hour (or whatever time limit you decide is fair to you) if the cart is not removed.
Tell him to explain to your mother that this is inappropriate use of the cart.
She is HIS responsibility scripturally.
The cart and where it goes is also his responsibility in the eyes of the ORg.
i was recently thinking before i became " mike" i was an innocent baby, then as the days passed slowly by, i developed a sence of " iam".
as the days moved forward my body, slowly developed a a "sex organ" whilst my mind took on a sence of " emotional" and " intellectual" i am" .
this allowed me to become my current " i am?.
Have any of you heard of The Four Agreements?
I read about them recently and find them interesting. The second one is proving very helpful in dealing with JWs that I still work with and of course, still in family members.
i ask, because a neighboring congregation of where i used to attend was dissolved, and the people from there were scattered about to whatever congregation was closest.
but it turns out that they still meet at the old kingdom hall a couple times a week, for field service.
apparently this is done for tax purposes.. i suppose from a fiscal standpoint it makes sense, though it seems a little deceitful.
Is the real estate market down in your area?
It is recovering in some areas and still slow in others. Maybe they think they should sit on the property a while longer?
according to the elder's rulebook, there is this addendum in the chapter on the grounds for judicial committee and the section: "misuse of addictive drugs":.
please note: the use of addictive drugs under medical supervision, such as for pain management, would not necessarily require judicial review.
when questions arise, consult with the branch office.. .
I agree Grreat Teacher.
People completely deserve their privacy in this as well as many other areas.
The one place I think merits extra thought is when it comes to elders.
If indeed those elders are taking mood altering medications and sitting on judicial hearings where they render decisions that alter peoples lives hugely.
Several airlines had policies that would not allow pilots to use these types of drugs and fly.
There was a backlash and policy was being reviewed but the question remains.
Should a surgeon be allowed to use this type of medication and not let others know?
A sharpshooter on a SWAT team?
A teacher?
A nanny in your home caring for an infant?
I do not presume to have answers - only questions.
I can speak to this however...
a very nice young person I know did something requiring a judicial committee. In the course of that meeting an elder "lost it". He got in the young persons face screaming obscenities with spittle flying out of his mouth.
Guess what excuse was given later for this behavior?
He was "off his meds".
On meds? Off meds? Accountability?
Whose to say?
i believe it to be a waste of time talking to, reasoning with, jw's if you expect any kind of quick result.. many of us when we first wake up think that 'coz ttatt is blindingly obvious to us, it will soon get through to our jw loved ones.. this simply isn't so for a couple of important reasons.
the first is that, if someone believes something is true, or the truth, to them it really is, without doubt, true.
so whatever you say must be wrong somehow.. the second problem is that jw's simply do not have to use, or pay any attention to facts and logic.
While some are able to see for cerebral reasons, it seems like it is the emotional reasons that keep a JW from acting on even the most factual information.
The one sure way to knock a belief system right out of the tree is if they get mistreated by the elders.
When that happens?
THAT is a perfect time to say something that might really take root and gro,
Of course I say that because it is what happened in my case.
