MoodyBlue

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Posts by MoodyBlue

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  29

  What JW's on MSN Think of This Site...

  by teenyuck in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i cut and pasted from just jw's on msn...i will post the link, however, if you are not a member you cannot link in...somehow i got accepted!.

  http://64.4.8.250/cgi-bin/linkrd?_lang=en&lah=8c41521583fca644a4e2d0ee2c43f5b4&lat=1015435130&hm___action=http%3a%2f%2fcommunities%2emsn%2eco%2euk%2fjustjws.

  the jehovahs-witness.com site is not a jehovah's witness site.

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  MoodyBlue

  All I know after reading that garbage is that I"m glad as hell to be out of that mind control bullshit!!!!!!!
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  16

  I'm angry and scared

  by MoodyBlue in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i've been out of the witnesses for a year...and in that span i've become more of a skeptic towards any sort of religion or god.

  i don't know if i will ever again have faith in a supernatural, all loving and powerful being.

  i suppose this is because the only god i really know anymore is jehovah of the watchtower- who to me is nothing more than a jealous, angry and vindictive creature.

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  MoodyBlue

  I've been out of the witnesses for a year...and in that span I've become more of a skeptic towards any sort of religion or God. I don't know if I will ever again have faith in a supernatural, all loving and powerful being. I suppose this is because the only God i really know anymore is Jehovah of the watchtower- who to me is nothing more than a jealous, angry and vindictive creature. Whenever I attempt to read the Bible, I get extremely angry- and throw out questions that no one can answer. The thing is though, now, I fear death. I fear getting old. I fear eternal punishment for the way I am now choosing to live my life ( which is purely for ME.) Will this ever go away?? Will I ever be able to undo the brainwashing that was done???
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  50

  Bisexuality

  by gilwarrior in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  it is just me or are all the women on this board bisexual?.

  just a thought.. "three people can keep a secret...if two of them are dead.".

  benjamin frankin - "poor richard's almanac"

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  MoodyBlue

  Xena

  Lol, if you live close enough to me then we can deflower together ;)
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  50

  Bisexuality

  by gilwarrior in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  it is just me or are all the women on this board bisexual?.

  just a thought.. "three people can keep a secret...if two of them are dead.".

  benjamin frankin - "poor richard's almanac"

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  MoodyBlue

  I am definitely physically attracted to women, but I love men. I think the girl on girl stuff is pretty sexy, and I'd do it...
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  9

  A (sort of) introduction

  by MoodyBlue in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  wow, i haven't posted on here in a long time... i lurked, back in the winter of '00, and posted in early '01 a few times.

  looking back on those posts, and other stuff written, it amazes me how much can change... i thought to integrate myself into this web community i'd tell some of my story.... i was not raised in the truth.

  i fell in love with a jw boy when i was 20 and married him.

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  MoodyBlue

  Wow, I haven't posted on here in a long time... I lurked, back in the winter of '00, and posted in early '01 a few times. Looking back on those posts, and other stuff written, it amazes me how much can change... I thought to integrate myself into this web community I'd tell some of my story...

  I was not raised in the truth. I fell in love with a JW boy when I was 20 and married him. I got baptized in Nov of 99, against my better judgement. I was in love and WANTED to believe in his faith, WANTED to believe in the promises of a perfect world, and WANTED to believe I had found the indisputable truths of life. It just didn't happen that way. I couldn't believe the teachings- things just didn't jive. I started doing research secretly on the web, and sure enough, a lot of the people felt the same way as I did. My husband knew I had a lot of doubts, but it was absoulte truth to him, and so I was labelled as falling into "apostate" and "independent" thinking...

  I was unhappy as hell; hated life. After a crazy, depressive year, I got some help from doctors and counsellors. I knew that the life I was in wasn't making me happy, and I had to change that. Trying to gain some independence, I started a new job in the fall of 2000 because I was thinking about leaving my husband(and the jw religion behind.)

  I feel like I have to justify my actions here, which is probably just insecurity...I guess it suffices to say that I tried EVERYTHING I could think of to save my marriage, and my faith. I was not treated well by my husband, though maybe his intentions were good. The congregation tried to help me, but their attempts were futile.

  After a lot of soul searching and sleepless nights, and even sometimes prayers, I left in February of 01. I'm 23. Here it is almost a full year later, and I'm living a completely different life. I'm in a different country, surrounded by different people. It's strange, but also exhilerating. I'm starting to accept, at least for now, that I don't have the answers to all of life's questions. And maybe, that's ok. Life deals some shitty blows sometimes, but we are still all responsible for the choices we make. If we learn from our mistakes, maybe that's what matters. I still beleive in God, but I don't know to what extent. I have no interest in any sort of religion right now. Maybe I will down the road- I'm just not sure.

  That's where I'll stop. I look forward to meeting people on this board...

  alli

  (I also think dubla is really cute btw!! ;)
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  9

  df'ing in absentia...

  by MoodyBlue in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i was wondering... can the elders df you in absentia if you haven't admitted to doing anything wrong??.

  my ex wanted his scriptural grounds for a divorce and i told him he had them.

  he went to the elders with this info and they called me up last night to try and get me to confess ( which i didn't- i told them it was none of thier business) they told me that they were having a judicial for me wed at 7, and i said i wouldn't be there.

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  MoodyBlue

  I was wondering... can the elders df you in absentia if you haven't admitted to doing anything wrong??

  My ex wanted his scriptural grounds for a divorce and i told him he had them. He went to the elders with this info and they called me up last night to try and get me to confess ( which i didn't- i told them it was none of thier business) they told me that they were having a judicial for me wed at 7, and i said i wouldn't be there. so, can they df me anyway?? i'd rather just disassociate than have them kick me out... i have no intention of going back, but i'd like to leave on my terms instead of theirs...
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  10

  Feels good to be free

  by MoodyBlue in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  it feels great to be free.

  it feels great to go out with old girlfriends for beer and wings.

  it feels great to walk down the street and smile at people i don't know.

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  MoodyBlue

  It feels great to be free. It feels great to go out with old girlfriends for beer and wings. It feels great to walk down the street and smile at people i don't know. It feels great to have NO guilt on tuesday and thursday nights. It feels great to sleep in on the weekends. It feels great to openly question whatever i want to. It feels great to talk to other people that know the release of being out of the watchtower. It feels great to live for ME.

  My ex came over last night to drop off some things. It was the only time I've cried since I've left. I've felt better than ever before about my life. I can't wait to go back to school and finish my degree. I can't wait to travel. But right now, I'm enjoying just BEING, each and every day is such a gift.

  The what if's a creep up still. I'm sure that's normal for a while. When I heard about the seattle earthquake yesterday, for a moment , my stomach was in knots, and the old thoughts started to flow. I'm sure it will just take time. I think a big comfort for me is knowing that things just aren't black and white like the WT sees them. Knowing I am free to question that makes a huge difference.

  Anyway, does anyone else find themselves looking at how glorious the world really is, and feeling glad for your place in it?? Though there are bad times, all in all, isn't it pretty damn good to be alive?
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  13

  Question about disfellowshipping

  by MoodyBlue in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have a question.... if the elders "catch wind" of something that could be a df'ing offense, and they ask for a judicial, if you don't show up or refuse to talk to them, can they disfellowship u in absence??

  if they can, is there any legal action that can be taken against it?.

  i've been threatened by my jw husband (we are separated) because i've met someone else...he is threatening to tell the elders i'm dating someone else ( though as of yet, no "fornication" has occured and it's long distance) if i don't write a letter of disassociation.

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  MoodyBlue

  To all of u that have let me know your concern, thank you. Things are going ok for me, i guess i'm stronger than i thought. I'm coping well, and getting back to counselling as well. this whole decision has been coming for a while, but the fear kept me stagnant...

  I don't want to submit to JW "rules" anymore. I want to just walk away, without all the junk. I think the reason my ex is pressing the issue is because he doens't want me "bringing reproach on Jehovah and his org." I don't have immediate family in the org, as it was my husband who brought me in. I just don't like the idea of being shunned. it's complete bullshit to me. i would rather just say, "shove it," and walk away.
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  15

  The 'Generation' is BACK!

  by nicolaou in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  the following is copied directly from the society's official website.

  for any here who are familiar with the change in understanding of the 1914 generation, it may seem quite shocking.. the society put this information on their site *after* the change in understanding and have kept it there for the past five years!.

  begin quote.

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  MoodyBlue

  I was told when I studied (after the teaching was changed) that there would be some of the annointed still alive, because they would have to direct the work after armageddon. So i asked, while we're getting younger, will they still be getting old and dying, and of course i got some sort of bs answer about Jehovah just taking them...

  It's all garbage if u ask me... but i guess it gives people hope..
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  13

  Question about disfellowshipping

  by MoodyBlue in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have a question.... if the elders "catch wind" of something that could be a df'ing offense, and they ask for a judicial, if you don't show up or refuse to talk to them, can they disfellowship u in absence??

  if they can, is there any legal action that can be taken against it?.

  i've been threatened by my jw husband (we are separated) because i've met someone else...he is threatening to tell the elders i'm dating someone else ( though as of yet, no "fornication" has occured and it's long distance) if i don't write a letter of disassociation.

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  MoodyBlue

  I have a question...

  If the elders "catch wind" of something that could be a df'ing offense, and they ask for a judicial, if you don't show up or refuse to talk to them, can they disfellowship u in absence?? IF they can, is there any legal action that can be taken against it?

  I've been threatened by my JW husband (we are separated) because I've met someone else...he is threatening to tell the elders i'm dating someone else ( though as of yet, no "fornication" has occured and it's long distance) if i don't write a letter of disassociation. I wanted to be able to simply walk away quietly from the religion, but now wonder if that's possible.

  Does anyone know about judicial procedures??