jambon1-Your comment "you are married to a woman who believes you are worthy of being put to death by god", a very sad, but true statement. My husband is the one who is the JW in this family. He is depressed too. I think many JW's are depressed because of the negativity of the Organization, looking always for the worst in people that aren't JW's coupled with the stress of being guilted for never doing enough according to them.
PaintedToeNail
JoinedPosts by PaintedToeNail
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11
The conflict of living in a divided home is finally getting to me - 8 years later - advice please
by jambon1 into cut my long story short, having left the religion in 2006, my marriage with 2 young kids involved went through a fairly difficult time.
for a few years.
as i rebelled against the belief system i was astonished that having pointed out reasonable & logical objections, my wife just stood by the religion.
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Daughter Learns TTATT Thanks to Her Loving Family
by cultBgone inhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ycb9blknu2g&list=uuzxbfewkkmm36zfo1xfkm7g.
this is a video from 1990 that waas posted about four years ago on randy watter's youtube channel.
it's long but reveals the emotions one experiences as they wake up and realize how much they've been misled and lied to by the organization who claimed to represent god.. thankfully jennifer's dad never gave up trying to give her a rewarding and fulfilling life.
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PaintedToeNail
Will watch when I'm alone.
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First post
by BenRichards ini've been lurking here off and on for a few years, figured i would introduce myself and share the clif notes version of my story.. i'm in my late 30's and was born in.
mom was a jw, dad wasn't.
got baptized in my teens and started dating my eventual wife.
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PaintedToeNail
Ben-Welcome and thanks for your story. Your mother probably wouldn't thank you for sharing your new-found info. Sometimes it's best to leave sleeping dogs alone. You seem to be balancing everything pretty well without revealing yourself.
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Telephone Conversations Today with 2 Elders Re: Shunning - Or Not?
by abbasgreta inmy alcoholic and aged jw mother is now extremely ill and is being cared for in every respect by my non-jw brother.
3 sisters visited him yesterday and were adamant.
that i (disassociated and shunned by her for nearly 3 years) was able to 'visit her any time' and that ' there was nothing to stop me seeing her' as long as i. didn't discuss spiritual things with her.
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PaintedToeNail
abbas-How very moving! I'm so glad you have you mum back and that your family is reunited again. Wonderful news!
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Give me a reason not to go back
by chukky 594 inbeen out now for 10 yrs but life is a mess.
starting to think its because i have no spiritual compass.
why shouldn't i consider going back?.
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PaintedToeNail
Geting up earliy to g oout in service, especially on cold, wet days and holidays.
People who will drop you at the drop of a hat if you get DF'd. My parent is a DF'd JW. Faithful and baptized over 45 years. DF'd in February, now facing a rare cancer alone. The neighbor, who is worldly also is facing cancer-he is getting tons of visitors from his church and organizations he was part of over the years. My parent is getting abosolutely none.
Explain the 1914 generation to yourself, starting with the first incarnation and ending with the latest.
Aiding pedophiles and punishing the victims when they act out their damaged emotions.....
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I can not hear this song without tapping my foot
by nonjwspouse inbluegrass music to me is the most delightful, happifying music, esecially when outside, listening to it live.. one of my favorite entertainers has always amazed me with his talent on the banjo.
this clip with earl scruggs ( whos son was engaged to a friend of mine, which makes him even more of a special entertainer to me) and steve martin, (one of my very favorites in both hollywood and music genres) is one of my favorite clips of this song.
it shows the true humility of steve martin making sure the stage was not all about him, even though he was more well known in hollywood.. i wish, really wish, one of my kids would have taken up the banjo.
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PaintedToeNail
Have you ever seen the Sleepy Man Banjo Boys? Young boy of about 9 playing the banjo accompanied by his 11 year old brother sizzling on the violin and 13 year old brother on the guitar. Check them out on youtube, they were on Letterman and also performed at a folk festival in Philadelphia. We were amazed at how good they are!
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Telephone Conversations Today with 2 Elders Re: Shunning - Or Not?
by abbasgreta inmy alcoholic and aged jw mother is now extremely ill and is being cared for in every respect by my non-jw brother.
3 sisters visited him yesterday and were adamant.
that i (disassociated and shunned by her for nearly 3 years) was able to 'visit her any time' and that ' there was nothing to stop me seeing her' as long as i. didn't discuss spiritual things with her.
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PaintedToeNail
The second elder seems much more empathtic than the first. Recently my SIL was DF'd. She was the caregiver of an over 80, wheelchair bound sister in the congregation-the only one to clean her home, visit her, take her to doctor appointments. She also checks in on my elderly MIL, who is in her own home and drives and goes where ever she wishes. The super-apostle elder in that KH told the elderly wheelchair bound sister that under NO circumstances was she to let my SIL come to care for her. However, my MIL can still be looked in on as she is family. This elder was once in Bethel and his word is accepted as if he was one of the GB himself.
My SIL was furious. She said "He would rather have the 80+ year old sister live in squalor and be lonely and neglected, than have someone DF'd care for her." No one else bothers with the old lady. My MIL will pick her up for meetings, but is in no condition to be cleaning her house, as she is struggling with her own. It is truly a horrible witness for any neighbors, that is for sure.
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A STRANGE thing happened on the way to the Psychiatrist...
by PaintedToeNail inhe's gone apostate!
as some may remember, when i started my fade, my husband freaked out and thought i was going to leave him.
he wanted to see someone about our marriage.
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PaintedToeNail
OneEyed-I don't think it was me who changed his mind, so I won't take credit for it. He became a JW after he was a practicing doctor. When he said he had only been a JW for about 5 years, I couldn't believe it, it seemed so at odds with intelligence. Your are right, when one can no longer tolerate being force fed, it can be an expolsive force to be reckoned with.
joe134cd-This doctor does have at least one daughter. I don't know his ethnic background, other than to say American. He doesn't sound like he has a German accent.
theopug-It doesn't seem like it can be the same person, this guy wasn't in long enought to be a Presiding/COBE elder. I don't believe he ever was an elder.
Lisa-It wasn't a conflict of interest for the doctor at the time, as my hubby was the actual patient-not me. It was in his queries as to my hubby's mental state that the comment was made because of upsetting the status quo. It was hurtful and demeaning and left me angry.
Reopened-That is horrible! One really good reason to NEVER see a JW secularly for a personal problem. There was an article years ago in the Borg literature that JW's in the medical field should divulge personal details of private, protected conversations as a sign of loyalty to God. That is why I mentioned the HIPAA regulations to him before I started talking.
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A STRANGE thing happened on the way to the Psychiatrist...
by PaintedToeNail inhe's gone apostate!
as some may remember, when i started my fade, my husband freaked out and thought i was going to leave him.
he wanted to see someone about our marriage.
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PaintedToeNail
He's gone apostate! As some may remember, when I started my fade, my husband freaked out and thought I was going to leave him. He wanted to see someone about our marriage. Unbeknownst to me, he spoke with an elder at the Kingdom Hall who recommend a psychiatrist to him. He told me he made an appoinment with a therapist and I agreed to go with him. Hubby never told me the Doc was a JW. After meeting the Doc and finding out, I was rather ticked, to say the least and felt very betrayed.
The Doc asked why I left, and I told him I didn't really feel comfortable telling him anything since he was a JW, but reminded him of the HIPAA laws that prevented him from disclosing anything that I told him to the elders. The subsequent conversation(s) delved into all the doubts and inconsistancies within the Organization, the control and fear mongering and so on. He made a rather desultory comment about me wanting to do my own thing at the expense of my family, which was really angering. My doubts and concerns were from the time I was a little child and my decision to abruptly fade wasn't taken lightly, knowing the consequences defecting could easily bring-shunning from every single person I've ever known. After several decades of trying to swallow everything from the GB, my health and mental state were shot, I couldn't live a lie anymore.
Anyway, it is now several years later, I had stopped going with hubby after about 3 visits, not feeling the need to be insulted any longer. Hubby stopped going about a year ago. Recently, he needed a refill on his meds. He called for an appointment, as this Doc doesn't like to do refills without seeing the patient personally. Two weeks later an envelope comes in the mail from the office, addressed to hubby, but since I take care of all bills, I opened it, expecting to have an invoice to pay. Instead it was a brief mesage saying: "Due to a conflict of interest, the Doctor felt it was necessary to have hubby see another doctor. Please understand." I was surprised. I thought that the Doc didn't want to see him because of me, as the District Convention was freshly over and the talks on apostates were just brought out, that I was the conflict of interest. Immediately calling hubby, he seemed curiously undisturbed about the letter, and rather aloof when I wondered what had transpired. After several queries, when I finally came out with it and said I wonder if he felt I was the conflict of interest because I refuse to attend any longer or if perhaps the Doc got DF'd, Hubby finally came clean, the Doctor had sent in a letter removing HIMSELF from the congregation! What a surprise to me! He had known for several weeks and never said anything, hoping I would never find out.
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needing advice on neighbors and ...
by advice-on-neighbors inguns.
i am not jehovahs' witness, so thank you for allowing me this visit.
i have friends i respect deeply who are, and much apprecaite their faith and integrity.. however i have a problem with my jehovah witness neigbors shooting guns often, five days this week.
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PaintedToeNail
Does your state or county have prohibitions on noise or discharge of weapons in proximity of other houses? If so contact the police. You can also try contacting the local Kingdom Hall and ask to speak to the elders about one of the 'brothers' going there...it might not work, but it is worth a try.