I was asked by some people in chat if this is a true story...
I wish it wasn't!
Posts by msil
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10the shadow lurkers
by msil inthis was the first house i ever knew...when mom came home from the hospital...this was it.
i waited all those months to get into this world and come and live here...a peaceful home.
i had some toys and spent my days learning to ride my tricycle and then progressed onto learning to ride my beautiful blue bicycle which dad had brought home as an end-of-year gift for me.
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10
the shadow lurkers
by msil inthis was the first house i ever knew...when mom came home from the hospital...this was it.
i waited all those months to get into this world and come and live here...a peaceful home.
i had some toys and spent my days learning to ride my tricycle and then progressed onto learning to ride my beautiful blue bicycle which dad had brought home as an end-of-year gift for me.
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msil
This was the first house I ever knew...when Mom came home from the hospital...this was it. I waited all those months to get into this world and come and live here...a peaceful home. I had some toys and spent my days learning to ride my tricycle and then progressed onto learning to ride my beautiful blue bicycle which Dad had brought home as an end-of-year gift for me. It was beautiful. Shiny, new it reflected Daddy's love to me....every time it shone in the bright sun I could see the sparkle in his eyes!! I was his boy!!! He was so proud of me. He had saved money for months so he could experience the joy of giving his son the blue bicycle.
Later that afternoon and in the next week or so, the bicycle became a little less shiny, my hands and knees knew mother earth a little more intimately as I practiced and practiced to learn how to ride
I was 5 years old lived in a nice house on a decent size piece of property which my Dad had provided for the family. I had 2 dogs, a cat loving parents who loved each other and loved me. Life was grand..and I can still see it all so clearly now.
The next door neighbor was my age....his name was Gary and he had a small yellow bicycle. He could ride it like a champion. He was my best friend and I was his. I wanted so badly to be able to ride like him.
And then one day it happened! I got on my bike, cranked away at the peddles and a new rider was born. I was elated. I showed my dogs how well I could ride and reminded them that now I would be as fast as them for the first time.
"Gary, I have to show Gary I suddenly thought" and I raced out of my driveway and into his. His driveway was clear and the house was quiet. I rode up to the front door, in case someone was inside - that way they could see how well I could ride now. I knocked on the door...and waited.
No answer...I knocked again...nothing. Unperturbed I walked back to my bicycle and lifted one leg over...and I heard a peculiar noise. It came from the backyard in Gary's house. I dismounted, thinking perhaps it was Gary. I walked around the back of the house...the door on the porch was wide open. I went to stick my head through to see if Gary was there.
The 2 men were holding down the woman in the family room. One of the men held a bread knife pointing at her face. The other one was asking her questions. I looked more closely and I recognized the woman. It was Mavis. Mavis - the cleaning lady. She had been hit on the side of her face, obviously by one of the men. She was terrified.
I was too young to know what to do. "Is Gary home?" I asked. Hearing my boyish voice I think they were totally startled. Quickly one of the men grabbed me, he was the one with the bread knife. My life changed in that instant. For the first time ever in my life I had a new friend...that friends name is "fear". The man held the knife at my throat, turned to Mavis and said "OK last chance....where do they keep the stuff? Tell us now or say goodbye to this boy".
Even now I don't know what happened next...I simply cannot recall. But I know I was locked in Gary's closet and I never saw Mavis or the men again. I just sat there alone in the dark, shivering, afraid, scared out of my skull.
The darkness was so scary. That’s all I remember...
The police questioned me at my house...for what felt like an eternity. But all I could think of was those men coming back for me...at night in the years that followed that day...that’s all I could think about. The men coming out of the dark to get me and kill me. I had to eliminate the shadows....I had to eliminate the dark...the lights would stay on. I had to sleep in my Dad's arms...He had to keep me safe...yes he had to keep me safe for the next several years. I could not sleep by myself in my room....even with the lights on. Yes if I closed my eyes...it was dark...so I would not sleep. My poor parents had to put up with me sleeping in their bed or on the floor in their room until I was 9 years old. If they locked their bedroom door for some privacy, they would come out and find me laying on the cement floor outside their bedroom door.
"The shadow lurkers....the evil men...please don't let them come for me. Please Daddy keep me safe. Watch over me while I sleep, pray to Jehovah for me...I feel safe by you Daddy...I love you Daddy"
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10
The Fragile Rose
by msil indelicate, soft, floating envelope.
what it is you conceal.... oh suffering soul, why do you want to know?.
i am dead inside, totally numb.
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msil
Delicate, soft, floating envelope
please to my suffering soul reveal
what it is you conceal…“Oh suffering soul, why do you want to know?
I carry the special secret of unconditional love…
the kind of which there is none above…”Is it for real, envelope?
I am dead inside, totally numb
my heart, just a machine that beats like a drum“Oh suffering one, there is a way…
for you to be whole
for you to feel love from the depths of your soul…”Envelope…..show me, please show me
happiness eludes me all the time
please, tell me the secrets of your rhyme…“Sickly one, but I need to ask you:
are you sure?
can you handle it? It is so demure…”Envelope…you are being so obtuse
please surely you know
there is not much lower that I can go“Alright, earthly soul
find someone truly special, someone who knows
and open up your soul like the fragile rose”Oh envelope, surely that’s not all
there must be more to know
so that my love can grow…“Yes earthling try…
and see how it feels deep in your heart
just do it and wait for it to start”Envelope, you are so right
I feel so alive, so …so…free
This is unconditional love coming over me?“Earth-son...take it slow
make sure you are always in control
unconditional love is designed to come from within your soul”Dear Envelope I don’t understand
why do you conceal unconditional love
why doesn’t it find everyone like a hand to a glove?“Ahhh weakling good question….
Because like the fresh rose, love also flowers
And its fragrances possess magical powers”It sure feels like magic
I love this feeling...like floating
Surely others would classify it as gloating?“Son, there is one more thing you need to understand
the sun will come out and the roses petals will fold
most roses die, as you will behold”But….but.. envelope then how will I know
that its for real?
How will I know that this is how love should feel?“There in lies the secret of the fragile rose…
YOU DON’T…you just have to let the rose be
and if it lives, then true power you see!!”And what if it dies?
What if it doesn’t last?
What if my head feels like it is spinning too fast?“Then, son, you can be sure
it was not love, it was some other derived fake
now please go your merry way and don’t make that mistake”. -
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msil
look at this one....mmmm
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19
mistaken email interception
by msil inmy wife sent an email to her sister from my server yesterday...unfortunately she had mispelled the recipients email address and it bounced back...and i just retrieved it.
as some of you know i have faded from the borganization and have been working to get my kids out too.
so i will post a snippet from the email, she sent, here followed by a question:.
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msil
Prisca...when I read your response I see I need to address and make something clearer (if you don't see it that's OK but perhaps I wasn't clear enough to start with).
I don't snoop around in the private affairs of others. I think people that do that are pathetic. Having said that...I did not snoop around like a low-life and go and read her private email. It bounced back to me on my server (I run a few of those in case you didn't know and I am responsible for ensuring they run without a glitch).
If it comes into MY inbox....is that snooping?
Hopefully, that is clearer...
My toaster is dysfunctional...
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msil
if this is a post, then answer it...