Accepting responsibility for your own happiness is the beginning of wisdom. Welcome to freedom!
Regards,
SandraC
Posts by Mum
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21Move is Complete! Life is Available!
by Metamorphosis inso my move to a new city is now complete.
it comes at the expense of losing my wife and my life for the past 30 + years - i still somehow feel at peace.
my wife cheated on me.
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65
The year the end finally came: the YEAR OF THE BIG LIE
by Terry inyou have to understand three things to comprehend the significance of 1975.. 1975 was the end of the watchtower society as we who lived in the 50's and 60's once knew it.
it would forever change because it was exposed for all the world to see as a group of liars and deceived dupes.. it all began with a baptist farmer named william miller who sat down with only his bible and a concordance and a crackpot idea that a .
a "day for a year" and the gentile times meant something profound which would effect his own day and time.
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Mum
Thanks for the memory, Terry. My memory is vivid about the 1967-1975 era. People were postponing medical and dental procedures. One of the brothers in about 1969 reminded us that there were no more than "90 months" left in the "old system." Everyone got excited about counting in terms of months. People were selling homes to live off the proceeds and pioneer. It was collective madness (read the theatre-of-the-absurd play Rhinocerosby Eugene Ionesco for a work on collective madness/anti-Naziism).
Although no one talked about the aftermath openly or honestly, I know that I had a nervous breakdown of sorts. I fell into a deep depression. I was not allowed to seek phychological or psychiatric help. So then my husband began to make false promises to me in order to get me to come out of the depression. His lies added to the borg's lies pushed me over the edge. I had to get away to get some perspective, to try to attain some level of sanity. How my poor daughter suffered as a result of having two such dysfunctional parents in a dysfunctional organization. It took a few years after leaving for me to realize that I had not been a part of anything "special" or any group of men that had some special pipeline to God. The trauma was almost more than I could bear. My daughter spent most of her childhood with her JW father, in part because I believed I was wrong and wanted what was right for her. What a fool I was!
Fortunately, most of my family never were JW's, and most of them behave as if the whole JW thing never happened. I was young enough to start my life over, and I now have a life that is joyful most of the time. There are still issues, but both my daughter and I are educated and able to work through our problems, accept what is, leaving the past behind. My JW ex hasn't even called his daughter for several years. She is tired of trying to maintain a relationship with him when he puts an organization above his own flesh and blood.
We should compile a book of individual stories of the aftermath of the 1975 debacle. I'm semi-retired, so if you want to write your story and send it to me, I will begin compiling them.
Regards,
SandraC
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17
When you left how long did it take you to get out of the JW mind set ??
by karter inhow long before something happened (i:e 9/11) before you stopped thinking the big a was coming??.
i read 7 news papers a week it took me a long time to read about some big bad event without thinking this is it the big a is about to happen now i read it for what it is.. what about you.
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Mum
Two years, more or less. My awakening was expedited by a meeting with the elders, whose tactics were so similar to terrorist or Spanish inquisition type interrogations that I no longer had any delusions about the true nature of their precious organization or their true character. I resisted going to that meeting, but it turned out to be Freedom Day every day since.
Regards,
SandraC
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6
Religious Police Outlaw Red Roses !
by Rabbit ini bet the gb wishes they could have this kind of power!.
does anyone remember a wt in the 50's or 60's that said something on the line of "...unfortunately, with todays laws we cannot execute (stoning) those who break god's laws..." ?
they were talking about disfellowshiping.. http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20080211/od_nm/valentine_saudi_dc_2.
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Mum
Apparently the Puritans (at least some of them) who colonized New England also had issues with nature's (God's?) provision of colorful plants. In the first part of James Michener's great book Hawaii, we meet a Massachusetts Puritan who lives in an unpainted house with only white flowers around it.
If red is sinful, why not green? It's just as bright a color.
This gives rise to questions about other plant life. Can fundamentalist, right wing Muslims and other puritanical types eat apples? Can they have a bowl of apples on display in their kitchens? Is eating red beets a stoning offense?
Alice Walker's The Color Purple is so wonderfully eloquent on this topic. Why would God or Allah create plants in such brilliant hues if not to give us the joy of enjoying them?
Regards,
SandraC
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5
PBS "The Mormons" rebroadcast Monday and Tuesday Night
by FormerMormon init gave my wife (i only have 1, thank you very much) a few wtf moments when we first saw it last year.
check your local listings for times.
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Mum
Did you find it to be accurate and unbiased? Many ex-JW's found the Knocking documentary about JW's to be somewhat sugar-coated.
Regards,
SandraC
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18
can any one help
by ladylove ini cant believe after 20 years of not being a jw that i found this site.. if anyone is willing to read this, and has any knowledge on the subject, i dont want to hate my father.
i am looking for biblical proof that shunning your family is ok, if it exist.
brief history .
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Mum
What a sad story.
I agree that your "father" is an emotional manipulator. You must weigh your options and assess your feelings and then do what is in your own best interests. It makes me so angry to see families ruined by this cult!
BTW, the scriptures cited about shunning are used by JW's and other high control groups. Personally, I believe they were written to warn us to protect ourselves and our loved ones, not to cause divisions in families and foment hatred. They are warnings about behavior, not beliefs.
Best wishes with healing,
SandraC
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9
an interesting experience
by ldrnomo inover the last 7 years i have been helping a young man who is now 16 and whose mom is a witness.
his mom has three children all different fathers the young man i have been helping had a father in prison and 6 months after he was released he was shot and killed so my young man has never really had a father.
since i have stopped going to meetings about a year ago his fat ass mother who is basically worthless has resisted my help to her son.
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Mum
ldrnomo, what you are doing is commendable. Be there for your young friend, but let him take the initiative. His mother's forcing him to choose between you and her is contemptible, but he's underage and has to comply for now. He could try to become emancipated, but he would need a way to pay his own way.
His mother probably won't be there for him when the going gets tough. You will always be there to be supportive and give help when needed. The young man will figure out who really cares in time. Don't give up on him no matter what.
Best wishes,
SandraC
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27
Mimi's Surgery
by BFD ini've gotten a few pm's asking how mimi is doing after her surgery so i decided to make this topic and post some pictures of her.
for those of you that don't know mimi is my italian greyhound and she had a chronic ear infection that would not clear up.
the vet decided that the best course of action was surgery.
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Mum
How nice to hear from you, BFD. The future is looking bright for Mimi because she has you.
Regards,
SandraC
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13
if a married elder "came on " to a worldly lady
by looloo inwhat would happen ?
if he was really sorry about it would he get a telling off by his fellow elders or what ?
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Mum
I've heard allegations of such things. No one believed the "worldly" person. JW's are not interested in facts.
Regards,
SandraC
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32
No plan for two years.....but oompa is taking his life back!!!
by oompa inone day at a time....and have found what may be an incredible ally in this quest.
someone who has kicked depression and booze and has even helped sober her dad up and he is a pitiful story.....jw....multi-millionair elder/pioneer who lost it all....due to bi-polor and booze....was in prison for two years on booze crimes, but has now been sober for almost three years.....his daughter is an incredible woman massage therapist, and also teaches holistic healing.....don't know a lot about that, execept i have been helped a lot by accurpuncture and they take this holistic approach...bit btw here.....angie has helped totally awaken her dad and brother!!!!
i am so excited to have found someone who wants to help me, thinks they can, and have sooooo much in common with and i will let you know if she can walk on water.............i am taking back my life!!!
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Mum
Life does get better, but there will always be problems. Learn to not get overly excited about the good or overly depressed or dejected about the bad. Life has its ups and downs, and coping skills are all you have to keep you in the seat of that roller coaster.
One day at a time,
SandraC