Posts by lilbluekitty

50

Weird things JWs can't own or wear

by lilbluekitty in

also posted on the yuku forum.. i thought it might be amusing to make a list of things i remember when i was a dub that we couldn't have or own or wear.

(some of these things vary by where you live, in other places dubs have them, it just depends).

obviously the list goes on forever, but feel free to add things.

lilbluekitty

Hah that's true, I bought thong underwear once in my early 20s and my mother thought sure I was fornicating and when I had a pair in my bag when I visited my grandparents my grandmother threw them in the trash without saying a word to me about it. *rolls eyes*

50

Weird things JWs can't own or wear

by lilbluekitty in

also posted on the yuku forum.. i thought it might be amusing to make a list of things i remember when i was a dub that we couldn't have or own or wear.

(some of these things vary by where you live, in other places dubs have them, it just depends).

obviously the list goes on forever, but feel free to add things.

lilbluekitty

Also posted on the Yuku forum.

I thought it might be amusing to make a list of things I remember when I was a dub that we couldn't have or own or wear. (Some of these things vary by where you live, in other places dubs have them, it just depends). Obviously the list goes on forever, but feel free to add things. Oh and certain things are just obvious like cigarettes, drugs, sex toys, etc.

Objects
Wind chimes
"Indian" corn on your door
Wreaths on your door
A single candle or fake candle in each window
Dreamcatchers
Smurfs
Harry Potter stuff
Lord Of The Rings stuff
Fairies, unicorns, mermaids, other "magical" creatures
Disney movies
Anything with the word "magic" in it, even if it was just something cute for kids
Jumanji
Horror movies
Rated R movies
Heavy metal, rap, country, rock (you get the idea)
Other versions of the Bible
Religious books not by the society
Pokemon and other anime
Dragons
Skulls
Yin yangs
Peace signs
Horn jewelery
Anything religious such as statues, icons, what have you, pictures of Jesus unless drawn by the society (apparently the idea of Jesus having long hair is evil)
Anything considered "pagan"
Aliens
Angels, even the cute cherubs
In some areas, heart shapes are considered pagan, same with stars

Clothes items you can't wear to the meeting (but some of these things you can wear anywhere else)
Fishnet stockings
Flip flops
Women with bare legs
Men wearing hats (but women can)
Skirts at or above the knee
Funny ties (like Mickey Mouse)
Funny socks
Sideburns
Beards
In some areas, even mustaches (sp?)
Crocs
Women wearing pants
Any haircolor not deemed "natural" and even if it is a normal color like blonde, you may be viewed as "slutty"
Afros
Cornrows
Dark lipstick
Any piercing except one hole in each ear for women only
Ankle bracelets
Toe rings
Black or very dark nail polish
Tattoos
Sneakers
In some areas, women wearing tank tops or sleeveless tops
Tube tops or tube dresses
Sun-dresses
In some areas, extremely long skirts and dresses are considered immodest
I've noticed dubs treat people with incredibly pale skin and dark hair like they're worldly and "gothic"
Oh yeah goth clothes are considered evil and even if you just wear black a lot they think you're goth
Natural red-heads sometimes get picked on for their hair being too bright
High heels over 3 inches
Certain types of shoes are considered too "extreme"

The list goes on, but let's see what's "banned" in your area?

40

Halloween

by MrFreeze in

jw
friends

so, do any of you ex-jw's partake in any halloween celebrations?

do you give candy to the trick-or-treaters?

do you dress up and go to parties?.

lilbluekitty

My second Halloween technically since I did go to one before while I wasn't going to meetings a couple years ago, but this is the first time I'm not really afraid to go lest someone see me (even though I'm not DF'd so I should be scared lol.) Love the Rick Grimes idea, love the Walking Dead!! Lego Man is awesome too though. I think I will go to the party I'm going to as a black cat though LOL.

16

Does anyone have a well worded DA Letter prepared?

by Jomavrick in

jw
friends

not that i cant write up something myself, but i figure why try and reinvent the wheel?

i think it is time to cross that bridge.

thank you!.

lilbluekitty

leavingwt, what a great letter! I personally am not going to write one but it was very well thought out and helped me better explain to my husband (non-JW) why I've been having doubts about the whole blood fraction thing since they started with that. He understood it was crap but since I'm newer to leaving the org, I didn't understand except that to me, would you eat something if I told you there was a fraction of rat poison in it? (That's the example I used with him). Anyway, it was really good, thanks for sharing it with us.

13

Let the shunning begin, apparently...(long-winded)

by lilbluekitty in

my father and i have been going back and forth on facebook in private messages.

it had been since august that my dad had contacted me, before i was beginning to "come out" about not wanting to be a jw, and actually i haven't actually stated that to any of my family or jw friends yet, as i was hoping to do the fade thing.. well i wrote to my dad and he has recently been very sr (self-righteous) lately and was copy/pasting "answers" to my questions right out of the wt cd-rom.

i called him on it and asked him to speak out of his heart.

lilbluekitty

After reading the "secret" elder's book (which I'm not supposed to read because I'm neither an elder nor a man!) I did see that certain things can be regarded as you DAing yourself like blood transfusions, joining another church, celebrating holidays. It's actually weird because it contradicts itself because it said in the book that only the person can do it (DA themselves) but those things I listed (among others) can get the brothers to DA you somehow. I dont' have the exact quote right now but it's weird.

Anyways, my father did respond back, and not in a way I expected but he seemed sorry for jumping to such conclusions, etc. so I gave him some excuse that would show I'd not be around much and will just leave it at that, be very quiet on FB and try not to be too visible on sites my family knows about etc.

15

When were the annointed resurrected to heaven?

by drewcoul in

jw
friends

i have heard that there has been some changes as to what the witnesses teach regarding the resurrection of annointed to spirit life.. what is the current teaching?

is it still that an annointed is resurrected "in the twinkling of an eye" as i was always taught?

i was also taught that this resurrection began in 1918. .

lilbluekitty

Not sure...I always thought it was in 1914 but I never undestood that stuff.

5

If the wages of Sin is Death than why

by sinis in

do the witnesses usually not allow a da'd or df'd individual, who may have been a member for decades, the opportunity of a congregation funeral?

especially if the family members or living spouse request it?

i thought we were all absolved after death, according to the bible?.

lilbluekitty

Good question!

13

Let the shunning begin, apparently...(long-winded)

by lilbluekitty in

my father and i have been going back and forth on facebook in private messages.

it had been since august that my dad had contacted me, before i was beginning to "come out" about not wanting to be a jw, and actually i haven't actually stated that to any of my family or jw friends yet, as i was hoping to do the fade thing.. well i wrote to my dad and he has recently been very sr (self-righteous) lately and was copy/pasting "answers" to my questions right out of the wt cd-rom.

i called him on it and asked him to speak out of his heart.

lilbluekitty

Quick background info: I live over 2,000 miles away from most of my family, my father included. I stopped attending meetings and service 3 1/2 months ago and my mother is the only one who knows which congregation I'm in. My dad doesn't. Even if he did figure out which I was in and contacted the brothers, they don't even know me because they never bothered to get to know me and my attendance was always sporadic in that congregation.

I don't care either way about my father's side of the family. They've never been there for me so I wouldn't lose much. Honestly I woudn't lose much if I lost my mother's side of the family either but it's much less likely as my mom is actually listening to me.

I never said word one, except on this forum, about joining another church (which I haven't done, I was only thinking about it) so unless my dad is so hypocritical that he trolls this forum (I lurk on another one but have never posted and use a different screen name) there is no way he would know about it. Out loud, the only person I've ever mentioned the word church to is my husband and he very much dislikes my family.

I'm not afraid of being DF'd and as far as I'm aware, legally I'm the only one who can DA myself and I don't have any intention of doing that, just not going anymore.

13

Let the shunning begin, apparently...(long-winded)

by lilbluekitty in

my father and i have been going back and forth on facebook in private messages.

it had been since august that my dad had contacted me, before i was beginning to "come out" about not wanting to be a jw, and actually i haven't actually stated that to any of my family or jw friends yet, as i was hoping to do the fade thing.. well i wrote to my dad and he has recently been very sr (self-righteous) lately and was copy/pasting "answers" to my questions right out of the wt cd-rom.

i called him on it and asked him to speak out of his heart.

lilbluekitty

My father and I have been going back and forth on Facebook in private messages. It had been since August that my dad had contacted me, before I was beginning to "come out" about not wanting to be a JW, and actually I haven't actually stated that to any of my family or JW friends yet, as I was hoping to do the fade thing.

Well I wrote to my dad and he has recently been very SR (self-righteous) lately and was copy/pasting "answers" to my questions right out of the WT CD-rom. I called him on it and asked him to speak out of his heart. Last night he sent me a message and since I went to bed early I didn't see it or respond quickly enough to his liking. This is what he said.

"Well, your silence tells me that you are inactive and are not going to meetings. Is it only that bad, or have you joined [my husband's] church? What does [my sister] and your mother know, and if so, what do they say? I'm hoping it isn't too late to say this, if you haven't joined his church probably by getting baptized there, please try to keep it that way. It's not a good thing to be inactive, but much worse to actually become a member of a false religion, worse than even immorality. It is called apostasy, and you will lose any and all FB friends that are Witnesses, especially family, and most distressing to me, even me. Am I speaking too late, or is there hope of you recovering? These are not threats, they will be realities if you should take that drastic action against us. I so hope I am wrong in fearing the worst. Can you please tell me truthfully what exactly is going on? Thank you."

Well I was flabbergasted. My last comment to him was of chiding him for not telling me to pray about it or go to the Bible for help and that he only copy/pasted WT articles to me without answering me from his heart.

So this is part of what I wrote back to him. Sorry it's so long. And by the way I never mentioned to him I wanted to join my husband's church or anything, the words I used are "spiritually digging." That's it! Things in brackets [] are things I didn't say to him but say to you guys to make it easier to understand our conversation.

"Wow are you jumping to conclusions. My silence was because I went to get my hair cut and went out to eat and when I got home I went straight to bed because I was tired, and my silence today was that I haven't bothered to turn on my laptop til now. Dude! I'm not joining his church or any church. [right now anyway, at least I never mentioned it to him] Don't assume anything about me "based on my silence" or my "attitude". I've been talking to mom, and even [my sister] yesterday. They know that I am just tired and I've always had a low self-esteem and I, like you and many others worry about getting destroyed, and they are allowing me to ask questions and though they base it on the publications they are also answering from their hearts, which is what I had hoped I'd get from you.

If I had started asking questions when I was perhaps 10 years old and was watching all the hypocrisy that was going on then[ ...] and it made me very angry and sad and again, made me have questions.

But, back then I truly believed you loved me and if I could have asked you questions back then, you would've sat me down next to you and looked at me with a worried face (you get those forehead wrinkles, you used to anyway) and said "Honey!" and not that fake voice you use now, "What's the matter? What happened that would make you ask these kind of questions? I think we need to pray about this first, and then you would have prayed out loud with me and then you would have really listened while I asked questions that now you would call me an apostate for?? Am I really so "mentally diseased?" Yes, I read that whole Watchtower article, that anyone that leaves the truth is an apostate and is "mentally diseased." True, that particular quote doesn't say exactly that but it's automatically assumed that if you stop being a JW (even an inactive one like me, though I've only missed about 3 1/2 months so perhaps I'm not even inactive officially) that I'm going around rolling in the aisles of churches and turning into a "rabid apostate" like that cousin of yours. When in reality I'm just confused about some organizational things, but instead of you or the family feeling concerned for me, and perhaps trying to comfort me and pray for me and kindly "readjust" my thinking, you are thisclose to turning on me?

That is certainly threatening but I don't view it as a threat. You are all so quick to turn on those you're supposed to love. I'm not even talking about mom because she's a different story. It's true [my sister] has said and done some terrible things but you are all so quick to block her and talk about her behind her back. [She's still an active JW] When I'm around you all I find myself doing the same things which is why I'm glad I moved back with my husband, where I'm supposed to be, at least now that I married "out of the Lord" anyway.

You want to throw around the word apostate just because I was reading a different Bible translation lately (for ease of getting my Bible reading done!) and I don't post my speeeeritual life all over FB (they've been telling us not to over and over again in talks, but I guess [my dad's mom] and [his sister] et al. haven't listened to those!) and plus I don't think it's anyone's business but Jehovah's whether not I make my hours or underline my Watchtower or even lay out my meeting clothes! Do I really want [my husband's] family to "become stumbled" about those type of things? Well then I'd surely be an "apostate" in your eyes, for leading them away form JWs! Then again it's "wrong" that I'm friends with them on Facebook, even though they're also my family now.

So go ahead and mark me, or even label me because you're so quick to jump to conclusions. You went for what, 8 years without speaking to me before? More? And mostly because mom turned us against you or outright refused to allow us to contact you because she was abusing us emotionally, physically, verbally and even spiritually. I only talk to her now because it's like she's a different person, at least outwardly. But you use defriending me on FB as a threat, oh I'm sorry, realities? I'm sorry, but it doesn't bother me. You all (perhaps the exception of [--] family because I didn't know them before, but I'm sure you'll be more than happy to turn them against me) have always been fair weather friends, or family. Quick to shun and even hate at the moment's notice or at even the assumption of any even minor wrongdoing. I'm used to it. Go ahead then, if that's what you see fit. I'm used to being ignored and even hated in this family.

I will leave you with this last thought: I thought we were supposed to imitate Jesus and show love to one another?"

*shakes head* I never mentioned anything about going to my husband's church or getting baptized there (I haven't) but he's ready to start shunning me already.

8

JW related murder case in WA state.

by JeffT in

jw
friends

this one has been under investigation for a number of years.

today an inquest jury ruled that what had previously been determined to be a suicide was in fact a murder.

they named the woman's ex husband as a suspect.

lilbluekitty

Craziness! I just read the article on Yahoo but it didn't say anyone was a JW.