Posts by Fognomore

21

Crisis of Conscience is being delivered to my door today. I can't wait

by Fognomore in

since i have no one else to talk to about what i am going through, i just thought i would let this group know that i have .

crisis of conscience coming to my front door today.

i already know what i will say if my wife says something.

Fognomore

Thank you all,

I work 12 hour nights, so it may take me a day or 2 to respond to posts. I have read each and every post on the subject and really appreciate everyone's thoughts, comments, and helpful suggestions. I also appreciated the many book recommendations. I must say in my waking up I have been watching and listening to Christopher Hitchens, Sam Harris, and Richard Dawkins. I will also be ordering some of the books suggested from the many comments in this thread. It's hard to piece it all together, but when the pieces start to fall into place its a process that cannot really be stopped, or slowed-actually its a process that speeds up. I am only on page 100 in the C of C book and I am so impressed with the writing of Raymond Franz. He is presenting facts about the WT in a kind and compassionate way without delusion of Grandeur. I believe his motivation is a real love for people, a real love for the truth to any matter. He is neither cynical or angry-something that I could not emulate if I were in his shoes. It's an amazing read and I encourage everyone to get this book. Again, thank you all as you are my friends and my therapy service - lol-

Best

7

Ill grant the JW's what they want and have wanted since the inception of their Borg

by Fognomore in

just imagine what this world would be like if the jw faith had the whole world as believers?

i just had a conversation with my dad where i said " fine , i will grant you that you your desire to have every person on the earth become a jw as that is the borgs goal by teaching correct.?

i followed up with " if that would of happened in 1914 or earlier, what would become of our world?

Fognomore

Hello all,

Just imagine what this world would be like if the JW faith had the whole world as believers? I just had a conversation with my dad where I said " Fine , I will grant you that you your desire to have every person on the earth become a JW as that is the Borgs goal by teaching correct.? "

I followed up with " If that would of happened in 1914 or earlier, what would become of our world? Could you tell me how the fields of science, medicine, mathematics, biology, history, and astronomy been affected? If you follow the JW teaching to the "T" you would have no advancement in any subject on earth. We would most likely be living as though it was 1914, with no cars, no medical knowledge, no advancements in math. The entire globe would come to a standstill and we would be living the same as in 1914 today. Think about it. I know my thoughts are not written so well as Im in a hurry, but think about the basic idea and let me know what you think. I think it's a great reasoning idea as it made my dad stop and think.

21

Crisis of Conscience is being delivered to my door today. I can't wait

by Fognomore in

since i have no one else to talk to about what i am going through, i just thought i would let this group know that i have .

crisis of conscience coming to my front door today.

i already know what i will say if my wife says something.

Fognomore

Hello all,

Since I have no one else to talk to about what I am going through, I just thought I would let this group know that i have

Crisis of Conscience coming to my front door today. I already know what I will say if my wife says something. It's time that as a person I stand up for what I believe and not be shammed , demonized, or ridiculed for what is my changing belief system. I have the right to read what I want, I have the right to change my world views, I have the right to investigate anything and everything on the WT that has stolen decades from my life. We are never taught to stand up for what we believe, but cave to the WT and give our minds away in an exercise of intellectual dishonesty. I will not do it anymore ! I have posted other posts, and it helps me. I am feeling stronger and stronger. I just believe how as "sheep" we are not taught to ever trust our own reasoning and thought process, this is not love, this is not kindness, this is not caring. Its emotionally and mentally abusive.

Peace

22

Emotional Moment...

by babygirl30 in

jw
friends

yesterday i was looking to share a pic with a friend of mine, and i swore it was in my photo albums (i have 3).

so i start going through them, and i see so many jw pics!

i had a huge group of friends when i was 'in', and so there is just pic after pic of assemblies, dinners, game nights, rbc projects, my family and the house i grew up in, people from the hall, etc.

Fognomore

Its hard,

Its so hard being married when you know the one person does not truly respect you, your thoughts, your dreams, your new and changing world view about the JW faith. Respect from in PIMI mate includes full on believer mode and anything else is " wicked" , etc. I personally feel that so many mates get frustrated and angry in deeds and action because their mate has not lived up to the standards that they set for them. They will not and do nota allow someone to be themselves. While I have no answers or claim to know what to do, I have seen this in my own relationship. Respect is slowly lost, and with respect love follows, the good times are less, fights are more. It's not love, it's not respect, but a person trying to force their opinion and life style on someone else they claim to love. We are viewed as damaged, wicked, non loving , and selfish if we do not believe the lies anymore and our mates will respond accordingly at every chance to remind of us that. True and emotionally mature secure and loving people should not make a habit out of this type of behavior.

18

I told my parents I no longer believe any teachings of JWs

by Fognomore in

since my last post i have spoke with my parents and told them i am no longer a believer.

i told them i just can't anymore.

here is my short story.

Fognomore

Hello everyone,

I really appreciate everyones input and just to answer a few questions. My parents are JWs , but my dad has been having second thoughts and we talk. My mom is all in and that has been great for her. They took it " okay" but I feel like they did not take me too seriously. I feel they just feel like I am going through a rough time, and will change my mind. My mom I know will take it hard as she is a true believer. I think ( almost know) in my humble opinion that my mom was attracted to the " truth" as she went from one abusive situation to another. She does not know another way. My dad wanted my mom so he joined and married her and the rest is history. I have 30 + family JWs on my side and my wife probably just as many. I don't think I can blame the " truth" for all of her woes, but she did try suicide 2 X and we really never got to the bottom of why. At least I don't know. I feel that she has never healed from her past in a constructive way, but has avoided all of her true self and feelings by avoiding the pain and throwing herself into the JW way of life. It's a great way to stay busy, avoid emotional pain, but at what cost? She was hospitalized twice, and it took a long time to get better. I really feel that many many JW's are not equipped to deal with reality emotionally, but avoid thinking about it, and dealing with the tough issues. So overall they took it okay, but I don't live there so I am not sure what is being said.

I do have three kids ( 3 boys) and my wife is very frustrated with me ( I can see it in action and words.) as with most she wants me to take the spiritual lead, study with the boys, make all the meetings. She did tell a friend of her's she was jealous as her husband was more active in the " truth". So overall , she cannot communicate about any negatives. Usually she just gets mad. I am at a loss for what to do. I don't attack people or the organization, but I just want to have an honest and upfront conversation about the " truth". I personally would not care if she wanted to change religions, become an atheist, etc. My worth it seems is tied to the " truth" which is very very sad. I could fake it if it was just me , but with our kids I need to be honest and upfront with them. I just don't want them to blindly follow the "Borg" because they are told too. I desperately want them to make their own choices and not go through the hell and emotionally damaging process of being raised a JW in its entirety. I have been reading allot and I am in agreement with the statement that raising a child in the JW is a form of " child abuse."

10

We owe our children honesty, integrity, and the TTATT.

by Fognomore in

in my waking up i have come to a very emotional and costly conclusion.

i have been waking up for about 2 years.

the greatest gift we ( i ) can give our children is honesty and ttatt.

Fognomore

Thank you all

18

I told my parents I no longer believe any teachings of JWs

by Fognomore in

since my last post i have spoke with my parents and told them i am no longer a believer.

i told them i just can't anymore.

here is my short story.

Fognomore

It is hard to separate the anger, but I assured my parents that I love them. Their story is all too familiar to some of the other stories I have read. My mom was abused ( emotionally and physically) , by her mother and my father had minimal support from his parents, My understanding is that my father went to live with his grandmother at age 17. My mom and dad fell in love and got married at around 18 and 19 respectively. I had a good childhood , but in looking back it really sucked being raised as a JW. I know I cannot change the past , and my parents did their best. They provided the best they could both emotionally and materially-they both worked very hard and I respect and am thankful for that. I have 2 sisters and one of them is my twin sister who is serving as a pioneer. She has been pioneering for greater than 20 years. Her and her husband are serving in some type of JW sanctioned disaster relief in Florida. I just see the lies, deceit, and out right controlling behavior of the Borg and it makes me physically sick to my stomach. I have read so many encouraging stories for the last 2 years and it has helped me. I have just come to the point where I cannot even fake it anymore and my kids deserve the opportunity to live their life without a chain of belief system. I did go to the meeting today and all of the stories made me twitch , its so cult like and so controlling. I just cannot believe I did not stand up sooner or take control of my life sooner. Thanks to all.

24

Question for PIMOS but all welcome

by ZindagiNaMilegiDobaara in

so once pimo how do you deal with going to the meetings, ministry, social getotgethers, conventions assemblies?.

for one you know it is all off key,.

two your 2 hours or more so just wasted (not counting the time getting ready,travelling etc).

Fognomore

Hello,

I am POMO, and my wife is PIMI-its not easy. I went to meeting today and almost threw up. Such a load of crap. I have told my parents I do not believe any more, but I have to tell my wife. Its unbearable to live in 2 worlds-

18

I told my parents I no longer believe any teachings of JWs

by Fognomore in

since my last post i have spoke with my parents and told them i am no longer a believer.

i told them i just can't anymore.

here is my short story.

Fognomore

Hello,

Since my last post I have spoke with my parents and told them I am no longer a believer. I told them I just can't anymore. Here is my short story. I am a 3rd generation JW , been an MS, on circuit and district assembly parts. I was a true believer , but over the last 2 years I have been awakened to the reality of the organization. I have been greatly depressed, angry, and in despair. My JW family understands that something is not right, I have not been to a meeting in 3 months but I went today with my family. It's hard to listen to the manipulation through talks and songs. I am an adult and I told my parents first as they deserve to know, and I will be telling my wife in the next month or so. I have struggled so hard.

14

Dysfunctamentalism

by Incognigo Montoya in

in reading through many posts over the last few months, i have started to form a viewpoint towards at least some of those witnesses/witness families, who are abusive and overzealous in their thinking.. arguably, many, if not all here, would say all pimi witnesses are overzealous in their thinking, but i sort of disagree with that.

without revealing too much about myself, my parents who are still in (father long time elder, mother regular pioneer), i consider stable and balanced in their views.

while i was shunned to a degree, after being disfellowshipped (they didn't go out to dinner or the movies with me or socialize with me publicly or very often privately, they didn't attend my wedding) they still spoke to me on the phone every few months, as i checked in on them and let them know i was doing alright (i moved out of state in my late teens).

Fognomore

Hello,

No one in this world is without some sort of dysfunction, but being a JW takes the dysfunction to an extremely high level. The questions that all people crave an answer for cannot be answered by science and or religion. What is the meaning of life ? Why are we here? These are questions that people have been trying to answer for thousands of years and have led to thousands of belief systems. Dysfunction has perpetuated "bad ideas"which lead to "bad actions". Living a life based on fact and science is a good foundation to live by. This is why I have a problem with saying that being a JW has not caused a dysfunction to sometimes PTSD levels.

#1. We are taught to fear the world and everything in it. How does this help a young mind plan for the future and or have a positive attitude towards self?

#2. We cannot speak the truth about the truth. We are never taught the basics of critical thinking and reasoning. I personally want to have a realistic discussion with my kids about this but have yet to.

#3. Education is looked down upon. From birth there is a true message of disdain of education.

#4. We are taught to refuse blood for no reason . People die for this belief which is false.

#5. We are lied to about doctrine. Not one doctrine has proved correct.

.....and thousands more.

The JW cult has and continues to destroy lives, so no I don't agree that my family would of been such a dysfunction without the incredible influence of the cult. I believe that people are sold a bad idea, and it consumes their life.