Posts by Whynot

What do you think would happen if I verbally refuse to report my time? It's been several months since I turned in my time and I think the elder got tired of asking me lol. Frankly, I think it's stupid that JWs are required to do this. It's a made up manmade rule like everything else. But I feel that if I tell the elders that I no longer wish to report my time they will start a witch hunt. I live a few minutes away from the KH, my father is an elder. I'm thinking of moving my publisher card to another KH and not attend just to get them off of me. I haven't been to a meeting in a year and I just don't want to go back to the man made rituals. Any suggestions?

My hubby is DF but wants to get reinstated. I just want to fade. I am still a believer but not in religion.

19

Translation Please

by jwundubbed in

jw
friends

i hate asking stupid or obvious questions, but i missed something somewhere along the line.

what is pimi and pomi?

did i even get the acronyms correct?

Whynot

PIMI : Physically in, mentally in

Pimo : Physically in, mentally out

31

We are giving too much power to the watchtower

by sinboi in

i am just 17. many of you here are much older than me.. i do feel that offering advice here is like teaching my father how to fuck.

but seriously, i do see the problem here.

we are focusing more on the problem than the solution.. i have been reading mind power books for quite some time.

Whynot

You are very lucky to still be able to talk to your family. I'm not disfellowshipped yet my JW parents told me they could no longer babysit my children because my husband is disfellowshipped. I'm not invited even to family gatherings anymore. You're parents sound very reasonable. The congregation avoids me when they see me in public but have no problem talking to me and hugging me at the kingdom hall.

I agree that it is very annoying when ex-JWs see themselves as victims way longer than they should. It's absolutely normal to go through a victim phase but they must get out of that to move forward in life and be happy. I do admire the ones that move forward and decide to help others.

The longer and deeper you are in the religion the more difficult it is to leave and even tougher it is to deprogram, get out of the victim phase. These people need extra support and love because their whole life has been built on the organization. It's absolutely normal to go through this phase and shouldn't be criticized. Same thing happens when people go to college for 5 years or more and end up unemployed and not being able to find a job, or to a person who has had a reliable career based on a company/corporation for many many years and suddenly they get laid off. It changes their whole life drastically.

At 17 you are barely starting to build a life for yourself. Sometimes you don't even know where to start building. 17 is a very fun stage in life. The books you are reading are informative but you can't get to fully understand how it feels being in the actual situation most of us here experience. That's how life is though. You can't judge someone and their reaction, decisions unless you yourself have experienced it in the way they have.

Btw I do think it's great that you started this journey early. You're saving yourself a lot of pain. Plus you seem to have a great attitude and supportive parents. A lot here will not agree with your point of views and that's ok. Don't let that bother you.

25

On and off again JW girlfriend

by Crzysin in

hello everyone, i have an on and off again ex who is a jw.

each time her family gets involved and she's gone again.

i'm debating biting the bullet and doing the work to become baptized, so we can follow through with our engagement.

Whynot

She's 31 and is still being manipulated by her family. This will definitely continue after marriage and I promise you, it will cause A LOT of problems. I have seen a lot of marriages fail by letting family meddle and manipulate. Why do you want a marriage like this? I know it can be difficult to find a decent partner but you shouldn't have to sacrifice your dignity in order to be in a relationship.

Why do you keep getting back with her? If I were you I would give her an ultimatum. She's too old to be acting like a child and letting others dictate her life. You don't need someone like that, I'm sorry. You may want to analyze and ask yourself why you keep getting back together with her. I don't know you but it's defintely not healthy to want to marry someone like this woman. You're willing to sacrifice a lot for her and it sounds like she's not doing much for you.

Fyi: I have worked for a divorce attorney for 10 years. I have seen your kind of relationships fail very frequently. If they stay together it's usually because one of them is always putting up with all the crap. Eventually they get fed up and leave or stay and suffer from all kinds of emotional and mental issues.

26

Affected by assembly

by Saltheart Foamfollower in

hi - first some context - i have been pimo for about 20 years now and so have been to a lot of assemblies in that time.

last weekend i went to a circuit assembly and for the first time afterwards i was able to talk directly to someone who knows i'm out.

i realised then that although i didn't agree with any teachings (i sat picking holes in the arguements as usual) the experience of being there had affected me - the way of life started feeling normal as did the overall way of viewing the world.

Whynot

It's absolutely normal for this to happen. It happens to people who get out of abusive relationships too. Deprogramming can take a lifetime. Personally, I don't like watching YouTube videos or reading ex-JW books but I am more focused as to the process of what's happening emotionally and mentally. Books like The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse, Combating Cult Mind Control really help analyze the power this cult has and how it connects to your thoughts. I feel it helps me understand the level of control the cult has over me and what I need to do to continue deprogramming. It also helps to identify the tactics and manipulation they use and how to reject it.

35

Matthew 24:34 not fulfilled in the first century

by Jules Saturn in

i was discussing with an elder the generation teaching and telling him when jesus christ says in matthew 24:34 “truly i say to you that this generation will by no means pass away until all these things happen.” he was referring to the generation from the first century in 33 ad and these events that were to take place took place with the destruction of jerusalem in 70 ad.

now the elder tells me to go back to a few verses to from verses 29-33 which read: .

“immediately after the tribulation of those days, the sun will be darkened,+ and the moon will not give its light, and the stars will fall from heaven, and the powers of the heavens will be shaken.+ 30 then the sign of the son of man will appear in heaven, and all the tribes of the earth will beat themselves in grief,+ and they will see the son of man+ coming on the clouds of heaven with power and great glory.

Whynot

Josephus documented some strange sightings, trumpet sounds, celestial objects before 70 AD. So, I don't know what he's talking about that it wasn't fulfilled.

133

What Is The Most Ridiculous Thing You Have Heard From A Witness?

by minimus in

jw
friends

i remember an elder questioning a woman who had admitted to giving and receiving oral sex from her unbelieving mate.

he asked her the most intimate questions which clearly flustered her.

interestingly, she “confessed “ to the elders because her conscience bothered her.

Whynot

My mother has said ridiculous things like if you go to high school you will get DF and if you go to college you will get DF and never come back. My favorite, if you get a job you will become a drunk, drug addict and fornicator. My parents forced me to drop out of school. When I was old enough I got a job against their will. They really just wanted me to live with them and regular pioneer. I did become a regular pioneer but I wasn't allowed to work or go to college. It was horrible! I was so happy to get out of there. They still try to control me but I keep my distance.

19

How do you deal with the loneliness after leaving?

by Whynot in

jw
friends

i'm having one of those days where i feel lonely and wish i had someone to just hang out with.

my husband got disfellowshipped 3 years ago and even though i didn't do anything wrong i was pushed away.

my so called "friends" decided to avoid me.

Whynot

My husband and I are still together. I am so happy I posted this. There's a lot of ideas you guys suggested that I need to try. I guess my next step is therapy. There's definitely a lot I need to process.