PrincessCynic

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Posts by PrincessCynic

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  61

  Would you do this to your kids? Is this cold or am I crazy?

  by BU2B in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  my mentally in jw wife is trying to organize a "princess party" for my 4 year old daughter and her little cousins and friends.

  she was looking at prices of a tent for the backyard party in case it rains.

  she asked the hardware store how much and they said 90 dollars for the day.

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  PrincessCynic

  Wow. I have a relative just like this. Him being made an elder is what initially triggered my waking up, I hope the same happens to your wife.
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  5

  Unbiased sources for research

  by PrincessCynic in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  can anyone point me in the direction of unbiased (or outside) sources for research.

  i'm particularly interested in anything showing the teachings or russell and rutherford and proof of what the wts society was teaching in 1919?.

  i don't want to direct my friend to an apostate site..

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  PrincessCynic

  Can anyone point me in the direction of unbiased (or outside) sources for research. I'm particularly interested in anything showing the teachings or Russell and Rutherford and proof of what the WTS society was teaching in 1919?

  i don't want to direct my friend to an apostate site.
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  10

  JW's DO celebrate Xmas!

  by PrincessCynic in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i'm finding it really funny how many witnesses celebrate christmas without actually 'celebrating christmas'.

  i'm just looking at facebook and seeing how many got together with family on christmas day or boxing day and had a big roast dinner, often with turkey, ate too much, drank too much, played some board games etc.

  then a few days later i'm seeing photos from all their 'family present days' where the kids get a ton of gifts to open.

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  PrincessCynic

  I'm finding it really funny how many witnesses celebrate Christmas without actually 'celebrating Christmas'.

  I'm just looking at Facebook and seeing how many got together with family on Christmas Day or Boxing Day and had a big roast dinner, often with turkey, ate too much, drank too much, played some board games etc.

  Then a few days later I'm seeing photos from all their 'Family Present Days' where the kids get a ton of gifts to open.

  I've left the cult and some of my JW family did more to celebrate the holidays than I did.

  On a side note, I also found out recently that there's more than a few in the congregation who don't agree with the society's ban on birthdays and secretly do something as a family to celebrate. These include well-respected members, not just 'weaker' ones. When it was discovered that I feel the same way, it was like I'd been let into a secret club, I had sisters approaching me asking quietly if I did something nice for my child's birthday and telling me I should have got a cake.

  Why don't they just give up the farce? They judge others for doing these things and only make an outward display of not doing them themselves.
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  102

  Since leaving the truth, do you celebrate holidays, and does your participation in such bring you happiness?

  by Stand for Pure Worship in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i ask this respectfully, and do so after watching a favorite show of mine's season opener which had a new years storyline.

  hollywood tends to make movies and television show episodes centered around holiday themes appear warm and blissful.

  while i'm thankful to have never participated in such holidays, i can't deny my curiosity about ex-jws that do celebrate.

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  PrincessCynic

  I think if it was just me I wouldn't bother celebrating anything. But then if it was just me I would probably still be a mind-controlled JW.

  Anything we celebrate will be for the sake of my son but he's too young to appreciate it at the moment so we're easing in gently. We celebrated his first birthday in the summer with a family day out and a few gifts but won't be doing much for Xmas this year, we'll just enjoy spending time together as a family. We're just going to follow his lead as he grows older with how much he'd like to do For different holidays.

  I'm reluctant to start gift exchanging traditions with non-JW relatives, mainly because I feel bad about compelling them to buy things for me and remembering to send a card just because I did the same for them. I've always thought that side of things must be quite awkward and a bit of a burden, especially if people are hard to buy for. I love giving gifts but not under pressure.
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  11

  Meeting for those wishing to be appointed

  by PrincessCynic in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i heard recently that a nearby congregation which some of my family attend are having this.

  basically the elders are arranging an open meeting with all those who would like to be appointed.

  is this happening everywhere?

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  PrincessCynic

  I heard recently that a nearby congregation which some of my family attend are having this. Basically the elders are arranging an open meeting with all those who would like to be appointed. Is this happening everywhere? Or is it something the local elders cooked up? I've never heard of anything like this before on a congregation level. Obviously there were always meetings at assemblies for bethelites and gilead wannabes.

  From what I understand it's a bit of a stagnant cong and the JW who told me couldn't think of one person who might go. Maybe they're feeling desperate.
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  32

  should I tell the CO my doubts?

  by Captain Blithering in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  its possible i might be asked by the co to work with him today.

  hes gonna want to know why i'm holding myself back.

  i'm itching to tell him about my doubts (only about the new light, how i cant get my head around how the hs would direct us to believe falsehoods for decades, not about everything, that'd be suicide!

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  PrincessCynic

  Depends on how much you have to lose.

  Personally, I have had discussions with elders about doubts. It really helped my husband wake up because he could see that my questions weren't answered.

  I think it depends on the nature of the CO. If they are very reasonable it might be worth it. I chose who I spoke to carefully, it had to be an elder that valued freedom of thought and it would have caused massive cognitive dissonance to him if I was disfellowshipped for expressing genuine concerns and doubts and not left alone to fade if that was my choice.

  Tread carefully and let us know how you get on.
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  17

  Marathon service days before Sept 1

  by gbrn in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so my wife showed me her instagram and one of her friends posted a picture of herself and a couple other pioneers with the title "20 hours in so far on our 24 hour day of service!

  " mind you they were all sitting in starbucks.

  this just made me want to scream!!

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  PrincessCynic

  My husband did a 12 hour day on Aug 31 once. There were so many pioneers not making a real effort to get their hours in that he felt quite proud of himself.
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  45

  Do you remember your Baptism Talk?

  by bildad in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  do you remember anything from your baptism talk or the brother who gave it?.

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  PrincessCynic

  Nope! I do remember sisters in the congregation writing detailed notes of the talk and giving them to me afterwards like a gift. I never looked at them and remember thinking that they're the same every convention/assembly anyway.
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  7

  Field Service meetings

  by Freeof1914 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hope all if you are well.

  just a couple if updates i don't post much, but i constantly read.

  i am now disfellowshipped and i am seperated from my wife and rebuilding from the bottom.

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  PrincessCynic

  Half the elders on our KH were salesmen. And it showed, I just never saw it at he time.

  Good luck with your real estate endeavours.
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  36

  I really need some help to get out of this religion

  by doughnutkitty in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  hi, i've been lurking on this site for quite a while after recently having doubts about the "truth".

  i've read a lot of posts about problems with the doctrines, mind control, the beliefs, brainwashing that jehovah's witnesses and their literature, as well as their history.

  now only being a sixteen year old born in who isn't baptized or unbaptized, i've come to find all this information incredibly overwhelming.

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  PrincessCynic

  Welcome! You're very lucky to have realised its not the truth at 16. You're finished with childhood and almost ready to begin your life. My sister left at 16. It was a tough time for her and my parents but she never looked back and, as she was never baptised, she was never shunned. Now she's the happiest, most successful member of the family. She started to fade from meetings using her exams as an excuse. She needed to revise.

  Ive made an assumption from your post that you are female and British, same as me. I'm going to give you the advice I wish I could give my 16 year old self....

  Don't waste too much time on here long-term researching, obsessing about witness land, just do what you need to do to convince yourself you're doing the right thing, get support and move on. Believe me, the more you step back from the religion, the crazier it all seems. You won't need reminding! I do think you should get a copy of Combatting Cult Mind Cintrol though. I'm reading it now and it's so helpful to see that there are so many other cults that operate the same as the JWs and their followers believe they have 'the truth'.

  forget about boys, drinking etc, there's plenty of time for that. Concentrate on your studies, that's what's going to get you where you need to be in life. Don't give your parents more reason to worry. Make them see you're intelligent, sensible, not going off the rails and capable of making your own decisions in life.

  Don't completely resent your upbringing. Your parents did what they thought was best for you, they love you and have given you a good set of morals that can serve you well.

  Personally I'd forget about the gap year and get straight into uni. The way the system is designed in the uk, it doesn't help you to have savings instead of getting a student loan. You've got 2 years to prepare yourself and your parents.

  Uni is the best thing you can do for yourself. Dont believe the JW stories that uni graduates don't get jobs. All my friends now are 30 something uni graduates and have very good jobs, own their own houses, have comfortable lives on top of the extra life experience and friends they gained at uni.

  maybe have a proper sit down talk with your parents (only you know how they will take this though) and let them know that you don't want to be a JW and will go to the meetings while you live under their roof if they insist but it's not what you will be doing long-term.

  pgood luck!