outnfree

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Posts by outnfree

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  91

  My Brother Died in a Car Wreck Last Night

  by WLG in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i just found out about an hour ago.

  he wasn't even old enough to drink yet.. to make it even sh*ttier, he had called me a few weeks ago and asked if he could come out here with me but i couldn't do it at the time.

  so of course the first thing that comes to mind is if i had done something different it wouldn't have happened.. he was going through the sh*t as i call it, when witnesses go off the deep end and get into everything in the world to stop hurting and they don't even know what is wrong.

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  outnfree

  I'm very sorry, too, ((((((((WLG))))))).
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  9

  Eryrthromelalgia

  by Lady Lee in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  a while back i posted about my foot problems that have plagued me for a very long time.. someone pmed me and suggested eryrthromelalgia.

  i am getting closer and closer to a real diagnosis.

  not that there is any cure for it but just knowing would make this so much easier - well it would settle the big question.

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  outnfree

  Never mind....
  Here ya go, min: http://www.emedicine.com/med/topic730.htm
  
  (Can't make it a working link from my macbook -- Sorry!)
  
  out
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  9

  Eryrthromelalgia

  by Lady Lee in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  a while back i posted about my foot problems that have plagued me for a very long time.. someone pmed me and suggested eryrthromelalgia.

  i am getting closer and closer to a real diagnosis.

  not that there is any cure for it but just knowing would make this so much easier - well it would settle the big question.

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  outnfree

  Yeah, (thank you, minimus), what is it, LadyLee?
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  53

  I am stuck in a life I don't want and can't see the way out

  by Orgull in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  some of you have encouraged me already in the week or so i've been here and i think you.. here's the situation.

  i am single.

  i am 34 years old.

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  outnfree

  YAY! The beginnings of a plan.
  
  Someone wrote : If your meeting attendance depends on getting more help from {the elders/congregation] they may leave you well alone.
  
  Too true! When you get back from your housesitting if none of the dear "Friends" have looked in on your parents, you might just have too much to do to get things at home back in shape to attend meetings at home weeknights, either.
  
  Also: That 5-year plan is a good idea. DO visualize what your ideal life would be -- often -- but don't give it the boundary of 5 years. Sometimes opportunities crop up and circumstances change more rapidly than we can dream. And see your family in your future still wanting a relationship with you no matter what, if that is what your ideal life includes.
  
  And visit here often. :D
  
  out
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  35

  Free at Last, or am I

  by Princess Daisy Boo in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i have just spent the last 3 or 4 hours reading everyone's posts and i am so thrilled and relieved that sites like this exist which allow us ex jw's to express ourselves.

  i feel compelled to share my story, even though it is probably quite unremarkable.

  i have this feeling that finally being able to express my thoughts albeit on the web, will finally allow me some freedom!.

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  outnfree

  Welcome, Princess Daisy Boo!
  
  You are working your way out of the JW clutter in your mind, and eventually you WILL toss it in the dustbin!
  
  I wanted to comment specifically on your fear that your parents discover that you do birthdays and Christmas with your little ones. STOP WORRYING! Why, you ask? Because you have the great good fortune to be an inactive, baptized, JW WOMAN, who must defer to her worldly husband in such matters. No, you are not supposed to actually ENJOY such activities, nor to shop for the presents, etc., but that part can be ketp to yourself.
  
  I was an active, baptized, JW wife of an unbelieving mate and my kids ALWAYS got their birthdays and Christmas (and Thanksgiving, etc.). The elders told me that holiday dinners were just a meal at which my mate required me to be present (we usually went to his relatives' homes to celebrate) and that it was the way I reacted to the meal that proved whether or not I was actually "celebrating."
  
  It may well be that your parents realize that even were you to be an active Witness, your husband still exercises headship over these sorts of thing in a divided household. (I really still have the lingo down, don't I? LOL -- I'm 7 years DA'd.) This is why they are employing a don't ask-don't tell stance.
  
  My [unsolicited] advice? Just go on enjoying your holidays without fear of being cut off. If your parents are still associating with you after 12 years, they likely hold you and their grandchildren dear. Don't make the kids feel like they need hide their celebrations, either. You can explain in age-appropriate language why their maternal grandparents DON'T celebrate/attend, and thus help them respect others' right to choose a different way of life. It will also reassure them that they've not been forgotten or are somehow loved less by your parents.
  
  Stepping down from soapbox,
  outnfree
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  37

  How is you all? Mouthy!

  by mouthy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  well after a lot more gray hairs & frustration.

  i am back .

  i hope all is well.

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  outnfree

  Hi, ((((Grace)))))! I'm feeling quite well these days, thank you. I so appreciate your prayers. I didn't know you'd moved -- I spend days on the forum and then disappear for months -- but I'm glad you're mostly settled in. Hope you are feeling well, too. Love, out
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  24

  DAUGHTER AND NIECE IN EUROPE

  by outnfree in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  my daughter katie and her cousin lisa are about to embark on an 18 day trip through spain, france, belgium, netherlands, germany, switzerland and then through the south of france back to madrid.

  they will be travelling from madrid towards the atlantic coast and biarritz, up to bordeaux, poitiers, tours, orleans, paris, lille, gent, antwerpen, utrecht, amsterdam, bruxelles/brussel, aachen/aix-la-chapelle, heidelberg, munchen/munich, konigschlosser, ravensburg, zurich, luzern, interlaken, bern, lausanne, annecy, avignon, nice, monaco, cannes, marseille, nimes, perpignan, barcelona, back to madrid.

  very ambitious, i know.

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  outnfree

  Greendawn,
  
  I actually agree with you, but believe it or not, this is actually the scaled-down itinerary! AND we Americans, especially my family, are used to spending long hours in the car. When the kids were growing up, the closest relatives were 9-1/2 hours away. And we made regular trips to see them.
  
  So, they're young, they're in Paris tonight with RAF, and they head to Amsterdam on Thursday, I believe. Also, these two are probably the most "go-getting" type personalities out of all the children of that generation.
  
  So wish them luck - or, rather -- endurance?
  
  out
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  26

  The elders were there to help make sure Margaret would die

  by Gopher in

  1. watchtower
  2. medical

  another watchtower hospital liaison committee comes through and "protects" one of their members from possibly/probably extending their life via a blood transfusion.. click here to read the original story online.. .

  jehovahs accused over gran's death.

  jul 20 2007. .

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  outnfree

  This makes me very sad as well, but I'm wondering if something like the ProCrit administered to me as I underwent chemo to increase red blood cell production (and thus oxygenation of the blood) might not have been used in this situation. Of course, I have no idea. But it might have been something that could have been tried as soon as complications set in. As far as I know -- it doesn't have a blood component, but I could be wrong there.
  
  This sort of scenario is why I stated in a recent post that not informing JW relatives about the deception within the organization could be dangerous to their health and lives.
  
  Just tragic!
  
  out
• 
  39

  Newbie here...

  by BuzbyU in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  a bit about myself.. i am 46 yrs olds old, live in chicago area.

  i am a dis-fellowshipped jw.

  i was in the organization since i was a kid.

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  outnfree

  Welcome, Gregg from Chicago!
  Hope you enjoy the banter here. I love that word--banter!
  
  out
  
  (Aside to truthsearcher: I know a couple who postponed having children for over 20 years because it would be unseemly given that Armageddon was "coming real soon." -- He was an elder, she a pioneer.)
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  23

  Aren't Jehovah's Witnesses just living in a ''Comfort Zone''?

  by RULES & REGULATIONS in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  my immediate family,aunts,uncles,and cousins have been members for over 25 years.

  they attend every meeting,put in their 10 hours of monthly sevice,attend assemblies out of state every year,give talks at the ministry school,avoid "worldly friends'',and do everything the wts requires of them.

  they really can't see that the wts has lied to them and will continue until someone steps back and opens their eyes.. what needs to happen in order for someone to get out of the ''comfort zone''?

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  outnfree

  There IS something comforting about what our newbie MentalClearness called the religion "a neatly wrapped burrito" -- that is something that is familiar, comes with instructions, and which is supposed to be good--nay, the BEST--for one.
  
  However, as a Witness Sister with an un-believing mate and four children under my roof (who did her 10 hours of service and conducted a family Bible study--often under duress) I felt anything but comforted at the Kingdom Hall. As the years went by I felt more and more guilty for not doing "enough," for not having children who wanted to pioneer or go to Bethel, for not being a perfect wife while trying to be an obediant Christian. I would come home from Conventions and assemblies depressed that my family would never be the one on the platform. The CO came and instead of being refreshed I felt like I was drowning in a wave of guilt. I was Sister Always-Prepared for the meetings and made them, despite my then-husband's objections and still got told at my last Shepherding Call (which had to be held at the KH since my husband didn't want a Witness to step foot inside our home) that I needed to be doing more with my children. Nope, no comfort zone there!
  
  I suppose it is different for those who grew up in the religion with extended relatives also members. Then the religion becomes your culture, and it IS what feels most comfortable to you.
  
  out