Posts by tornapart

20

The worst gift of Christmas

by GrreatTeacher in

jw
friends

everybody gets one, the gift that stared up at you hopefully from its beautiful wrapping, and then, like a deflated balloon, delivers the worst gift ever.. i'm not talking about the gifts from small children like the "greatest aunt" coffee mug or the red and black lace folding fan.

surely you never would have chosen them for yourself, but it's the thought that counts from small people who love you.. then, there's the what the hell were they thinking gifts.

my mother-in-law has been giving these a lot lately.

tornapart

I've never had a 'worst' christmas present... being a JW all my life (until recently) they have been few and far between. But I've always treasured memories of the ones I've had, so for me it's the 'best'. As a child of about 6, a neighbour came round and gave me a 'stocking' full of chocolate bars and sweets and some warm fluffy mittens, over 60 years later I have never forgotten it. At school, age 12, my best school friend, knowing I didn't celebrate it and reciprocate her gift bought me a necklace and some perfume. I treasured it for years.

I know my parents tried to make up for the lack of christmas presents by buying us gifts when they could and they were always treasured and I did the same for my own children, but those christmas gifts as a child felt quite special to me.

51

Rivalry among the sisters

by Esmeralda001 in

when i was first introduced to the "truth", i was so distracted by the love and affection that the members were showing me that i was ready to convert into the religion without thinking twice.

i was conviced that jws were god's people (i still think some of them are).

i made it my goal to get baptized as i wanted to be part of the "only" religion that produce such good people.

tornapart

My sister came back to all this after many years out. She now says to me she understands why she left in the first place. She still wants to stick to it all but now she is very careful who she chooses as her friends. Not everyone is the same. Like me she feels it's best to chose those you can trust, who are non-judgemental and are caring. Genuine ones like this do exist and they are to be treasured. They won't look down on you, gossip about you, patronize you or judge you. Admitted they are few and far between but they are precious. If you can find them then everyone else can be forgotten and ignored. Just don't let these competitive, self-righteous women get to you. Think of those in your life who give you pleasure and joy and stick to them, forget everyone else. You owe them nothing.

48

American accents, Bette Midler, Clinton, Rick Fearon, Strathclyde, Morningside

by slimboyfat in

i used to enjoy being able to distinguish different local accents, but for some reason i've got worse at it.

i was thinking about this today when i was listening to bette midler on the scottish radio.

i thought to myself i quite liked her accent and also that it reminded me of someone else.

tornapart

I'm with you on this Slim... I can identify most Brit accents.. even the difference between someone from Liverpool and Manchester, just a few miles apart.... but someone from the US... a big no! LOL I can pick out a Canadian accent usually, which is quite useful because I don't think any Canadian wants to be thought of as from the US!! (the same as a Scotsman doesn't want to be thought of as English) ;)

30

People keep sending me messages saying "what happened?"

by slimboyfat in

jw
friends

i am sorry i haven't replied and if it seems rude.

but people keep asking me what happened and i am not sure what to say.

thanks for writing anyway.

tornapart

Just glad to see you back Slim. Whatever reasons you had for going away and then coming back again are yours alone and you don't need to explain it to any of us. I've always enjoyed your posts so all I can say great to see you here again!

46

A question .....

by Landy in

hi guys - new poster here.

i was brought up a jw in the uk and stopped going not long after i was married.

that was 20 years ago so i'm not really up to date with the current doctrinal flip flops or the new youtube obsessed gb.. came across this site while googling the name of a local elder who's just been convicted of possesion of a pc full of unpleasant pics of kids.. so, my question.

tornapart

One of the few things I've learned in this life is that first and foremost you have to be true to yourself. If you can't be true to yourself then you can't be true to anyone else.

Taking the long slow haul instead of the fast route out doesn't mean for one minute that one is being untrue to oneself. I'd rather do it the slow way and keep my relationships intact (especially at my age) than to find myself totally alone. It must be great for those that have no consequences to suffer by doing it the quick way. There are many that have done it the quick way and are suffering a lot of emotional pain as a result. Everyone has to do what is best for them, be it quick or slow. No-one else can say what is the right way to go for another person.

46

A question .....

by Landy in

hi guys - new poster here.

i was brought up a jw in the uk and stopped going not long after i was married.

that was 20 years ago so i'm not really up to date with the current doctrinal flip flops or the new youtube obsessed gb.. came across this site while googling the name of a local elder who's just been convicted of possesion of a pc full of unpleasant pics of kids.. so, my question.

tornapart

Hi Landy, it's very hard! For me it's been a long slow process. I first realised it was all nothing more than being in a cult was 4 years ago. All my family were still in, hubby (an elder), grown children, mother, sister. Just leaving would have alienated them all. Over those years I've gradually let them all know how I feel. My elderly mother has since passed, making it easier to leave. Now I just attend once in a while for hubby's sake, children are gradually awakening to it all. My best friend and her family are also slowly awakening. I'm 4 months into becoming inactive.... sometimes you have to take it slow so you don't end up losing everyone you love.

22

Untrusted

by Esmeralda001 in

greetings,it seems that jw immediately assume that all "wordly" people (as they like to call it) are immoral and unworthy of their trust.

i sort of understand how it can be dangerous for a christian to have association with someone who doesn't share their values, but don't you think that some members take the conceal lied in corinthians 15:33 to the extreme?

what about romans 2:14?

tornapart

Esmerelda, they don't trust anybody! You could be a 70 year old spinster with a face like the back end of a bus and they'd be worried about a brother taking you home.... alone in a car.... it's normal for Jws. Everyone has to have a chaperone or else they'd be getting up to all sorts of hankypanky.... believe me, they think anyone on their own with a member of the opposite sex is going to be immoral. They say it's 'innappropriate'.

18

The value of starting a new topic

by smiddy in

jw
friends

i see some members , who have been on this board for many ,many years , who very seldom posted a topic for discussion..i would like to encourage everyone in this situation to re-think there reasons for not starting a subject for discussion.. sometimes after the event , i have thought to myself why did you start that topic ,stupid, however on reading the replies to that said topic , i have learnt a helluva lot more in having done so .in other words i learn a great deal more from the feedback i get from you guys than the question or statement i post.. you might think your question or statement is irrelevant , however to somebody else on this board it may just be the thing they are looking for to help them get through some issue of there own .. so please don`t hold back from posting a subject dear to your heart , or anywhere else .. just saying .

smiddy.

tornapart

I remember starting one a few years ago and it was like opening a can of worms. LOL It got over 400 comments and turned into quite a fascinating debate. (Titled 'If man evolved?') It seemed to take on a life of it's own and certainly gave me plenty to think about.

Having said that I think for me the best subjects are from various ones who are coping with the situation they find themselves in, especially having family members still in whilst they are mentally and either fully or partially out themselves. It really helps my own situation reading about other's experiences.

11

How about a CAPCHA test for ANY new post?

by Nathan Natas in

maybe it would be possible to turn the capcha test off for a user after they have "survived" ten posts without being thrown into gehenna?.

there must be some days it seems like a thankless pain-in-the-ass, but you are rendering a truly life-saving service.. love ya, dude, (and dude-harad and all the little dudettes) in an appropriate and totally manly way!.

- your idiot fellow traveller..

tornapart

What's happened with only being able to post a certain number of posts as a new member? Has this Nora Batty somehow got past that?

155

Survey: How long were you in the cult vs what year you were baptized

by ILoveTTATT2 in

jw
friends

hi people,.

i want as much data as possible on the effect of the internet on the time captured by the cult.. please answer the three following questions about yourself or about someone you know (for example, if your parents or grandparents were jw's and left).

1) were you raised as a jw, or did you convert?.

tornapart

1) Raised

2) 1973

3) 2011

Time in: 38 years

and yes if it wasn't for the internet.........who knows?