pale.emperor

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Posts by pale.emperor

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  20

  Re-read Animal Farm.

  by The Rebel in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i was one of many witness children, who studied this book in english literature class.. having re-read it as an adult it addressed so many issues i have with the organisation.

  including maniputive control, the re-writing of history etc etc.

  so many of the characters in the book, resembled characters i have known in the organisation.. boxer- loyalty without questioning.. squeler- a character who doesn't care about truth, and uses rhetoric of language to twist truth.. clover-who silently questions decisions, but stays loyal.. if your young, or old i would suggest reading this small book, by george orwell.

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  pale.emperor

  The poor horse that gets sold to the glue factory. That's Ray Franz right there.
  
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  4

  The most ridiculous bible verses, watchtower articles and society letters

  by usualusername1 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  after 8 months of doing comedy i have decided to focus on more jw material.

  my best joke so far is.... i lost my virginity on my wedding night at the age of 30. once i figured out which bits went where, on the next night my wife lost hers too.. i am looking for the weirdest bible verses, watchtower quotes or letters for ideas.. can you help?.

  i will write jokes as you post.. https://youtu.be/yaqsghboq8o .

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  pale.emperor

  My favorites include:

  Masturbation leads to homosexuality (Your Youth, Getting The Best Out Of It)

  "There's more evidence for the Kingdom than there is for gravity, electricity and wind" - Stephen Lett on JW Broadcasting
  

  "You know, scientists say that the cranial capacity of a woman is 10% smaller than that of a man so now this shows that she's just not equipped for the role of headship. Her role is one of subjection to the man. Her role is that of submissiveness and that means that she should recognize that she is a woman and be glad to be a woman. Never want to be what you are not equipped to be. ... Sometimes we hear her say, "oh if-if-if-if I-I were a man I'd do this and I'd do that as if to be wishing to be something that she is not designed to be. Do you know what that borders on? That borders on homosexuality. And do you know what the Devil is doing nowadays? He's taking women who want to be men and makes men out of them. ..." - The Value of Our Theocratic Sisters Samuel Herd, Oakland CA 1971

  https://www.youtube.com/watch?list=UUS0VqKpnSxUlt0gsZ6ahptA&v=Wqzc2M8_MBA
  
  
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  33

  How many in your generation are still JW???

  by Christian Gutierrez in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  how many in your age group are still jehovahs witnesses?

  from where we are at, there aren't many left.

  each year it gets smaller and smaller haha .

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  pale.emperor

  From the congregation i grew up in, 90% have left. HOWEVER... im on the only one being shunned because i left the official Watchtower way - DA'd (then DF'd anyway).

  The ones my age are still in full contact with their parents and even get invited to witness weddings and get-togethers. I mentioned this to my mum by text but she ignored my text. These are kids (now adults) who are "living in sin" with their partners yet im the bad guy for leaving their cult on my terms?
  
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  119

  How many of you followed the WTS direction on education years ago and have been screwed by it?

  by Julia Orwell in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm really interested in this question because i've heard for years that if you forgo further education and go pioneering, when you have a family down the track you will get a good job because jehovah will provide for you because you pioneered.

  as long as i was a kool-aid drinker, even then, i thought, "how does pioneering pay your bills?

  surely education should come first.

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  pale.emperor

  I turned down a place in university studying medicine because "we won't need Drs in the new system" and "how is a medical degree going to get you through Armageddon?".

  Fast forward 15 years and here I am in a regular office job that I hate. But hey, at least Watchtower got 40 hours a month out of me when I should've been living a normal young adult life.
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  34

  Are there 'ultra strict' congregations?

  by jambon1 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  when i studied as a young adult, it was in one of those congregations.

  having viewed the religion as a quaint little band of christians it conpletely dumbfounded me when i was told about such rules as 1 - no beards.

  2 - you must wear a suit to meetings and while giving a talk.

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  pale.emperor

  There's a "white shirt" congregation here in Liverpool. The elder who makes visiting speakers change into the shirt is a grade A dick. I've never seen him smile or laugh.
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  3

  International School Of Exorcism

  by pale.emperor in

  1. social
  2. current

  what a wonderfully hilarious read.

  bob larson, the crazy born again bible thumping idiot, will teach you how to exorcise demons and even satan himself.

  is he giving this vital lifesaving information away for free?

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  pale.emperor

  What a wonderfully hilarious read. Bob Larson, the crazy Born Again bible thumping idiot, will teach you how to exorcise demons and even Satan himself. Is he giving this vital lifesaving information away for free? No, he charges $500 for it.
  

  https://www.boblarson.org/webstore/

  

  Check out the FAQ's - it's got SCAM written all over it!!

  • Is there an application fee?

    No, anyone is eligible to enroll. Your enrollment is your application. However, before processing your enrollment fee we will first assess your Application for Enrollment form.

    So there's no fee but there is a fee?
    

  • Is the School of Exorcism accredited?

    ISE is accredited by the Spiritual Freedom Churches, Inc. International, a non-denominational church organization with scores of affiliated and associated churches worldwide.

    Don't worry though folks, his "School" is fully accredited... by the Spiritual Freedom Churches, Inc. International... an institute which is owned by... Bob Larson.
    

  • What if I already have some of the resource materials you offer?

    Great, just take what we send to you when you enroll and pass this valuable information on to others.

    Yep, just give me your money and ditch what i send you.
    

  • How closely am I monitored?

    The ISE curriculum is self-guided so you can proceed at your own pace to complete the courses as quickly as you’d like. Questions about course materials can be answered by calling our international office at 303-980-1511.

    Yes. It's almost as if it's a scam.

  • Will I be tested periodically?

    Yes. Each course completion requires the student to answer a questionnaire and also submit answers in essay format. If you don’t pass you can take the course an additional time and be retested without further cost.

    Ever met an exorcist that was tested by mail? Even if you dont pass, you can keep re-doing the test until you do. Imagine if doctors and lawyers could do this!!
    

  
  

  • Will I be evaluated in person by Rev. Bob Larson?

    Those who complete the Exorcist Level of study will be personally certified by Rev. Larson, and he will observe and evaluate technical and spiritual proficiency at a mutually acceptable location.

    I wonder where he finds enough demon possessed actors, sorry, victims to be tested on?
    

    Is there a discount for pastors or those in full time Christian service?

  • We anticipate that those involved in ministry will be our primary students; therefore to maintain the financial integrity of our mission we are not able to offer discounts with our opening enrollments.

    No discounts! We want your money!!

  • Are there additional costs for attendance at Rev. Larson’s seminars and overseas missions?

    Yes, those who advance to the Exorcist Level will be required to attend certain seminars for face-to-face evaluation and observational hands-on experience. Overseas missions would also be helpful to attain certification in some cases.

    Of course there's additional costs you fool!
    

  • Will my certification transfer to other Christian schools or colleges?

    That will depend on a case-by-case basis. Attempts will be made to encourage other Christian institutions to recognize the importance of our certification.

    Yeah, recognize the importance, and legitimacy.

  • If I quit, what happens to my tuition?

    All tuition is non-refundable, except in the case of confirmed health emergencies which are disabling.

  • Should I go through deliverance before enrolling in the School?

    We recommend that all prospective students arrange for a Personal One-On-One Spiritual Encounter with Rev. Larson. It is not a requirement but will be invaluable to understanding the processes which will be taught and to be spiritually prepared for the instruction to be received. An Encounter can be arranged at the time of enrollment or any time prior by calling our offices at 303-980-1511 or going online to www.boblarson.org.

    ...for a fee.
    

  
  

  • What if I’m a new Christian and not well-versed in the Bible?

    This course is just what you need. Studying the life of Christ and how He ministered is an excellent way to gain basic biblical knowledge of the mission of Jesus. ISE is an intensive way to grow in your understanding of Scripture.

  Just what you need. Because remember how Jesus charged people to learn from him?
  
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  51

  Bearded students on Ministry school?

  by NikL in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so at last nights ministry school we had 2...yes that's right two that had parts and gave them with beards.. i found it interesting.

  i thought the consensus was that you couldn't have any extra privileges if you wore one.. maybe the school is different?.

  anyway, anybody else seen this in the u.s.?.

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  pale.emperor

  For the last year that i was a JW i had a beard. I was 50% awake about TTATT at the time.

  I gave a talk with a beard and was the first to do so since 1970s. Now, most men in my old congregation are sporting beards. Not the elders though.

  It seems individual congregations are unable to use common sense and think they must wait for permission from the GB popes before they let beards on the platform.

  CULT!!
  
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  184

  Outcome - Banned in Russia - Final

  by OrphanCrow in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i just watched the live feed from the russian court room and followed the updates on the russian exjw forum.. just waiting for confirmation from other sources...but, it looks like the final (and expected) result is:.

  banned.

  which means that the wts property in russia now belongs to the russian state..

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  pale.emperor

  https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/2017/04/20/doug-stanglin/100698348/

  “They pose a threat to the rights of the citizens, public order and public security,” she told the court.

  True. WT would have it's members forgo their personal goals and aspirations to slave for them. They would hide molestation against children to protect their image.
  

  Borisova also said the Jehovah’s Witnesses’ opposition to blood transfusions violates Russian health care laws.

  Again, true. And according to Ray Franz half of the GB when he served thought it should be a matter of personal choice.
  

  During the hearing, one witness, identified as Natalia Koretskaya from St. Petersburg, testified that she was a member of the group from 1995 to 2009, TASS news agency reported. She said top church officials purported to enforce church rules "but in real fact the talk is about total control of an individual’s personal life — his intimate life, education and work."

  VERY TRUE (as we all know personally)

  Im torn. Im glad they're banned but it's bad on the Russian JW's that dont know they're in a cult. The JW's outside Russia will be so happy, "armageddon is closer!! Return to Jehovah!!"
  
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  20

  April 15, 2017 BOE Re: Kingdom Hall and Assembly Hall Construction Worldwide

  by wifibandit in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  april 15, 2017 to all bodies of elders re: kingdom hall and assembly hall construction worldwide.

  versions: us, great britain, ireland.

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  pale.emperor

  Carefully weigh the desire of your congregation to donate along with its financial circumstances.

  So they're just telling them in no subtle terms to donate more than they already are.
  
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  27

  JW Double Standards and Hypocrisy in the Congregation!!!

  by Christian Gutierrez in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i am sure you have stories as well of elders being a hard ass on many, yet turning a blind eye to the 'sins' of their own family or close connections.

  cheers everyone!

  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gma1auaur2o.

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  pale.emperor

  In my old congregation (Kirkby, Liverpool) there was an elder who beats up his wife. He's still serving as an elder there. His wife left him because she couldn't take the abuse anymore, she used to turn up to the KH with black eyes and a broken arm.