Posts by pale.emperor

19

My wonderful son

by KateWild in

hey everyone,.

for those of you who don't know my story.

i had a messy divorce i lost custody of my son in 2011 age 9yrs after four years of court battles to get him back i couldn't do anymore.. yesterday my wonderful son had an upsetting day as our contact was cancelled.

pale.emperor

Kate, im sorry to hear all this - but i dont understand, how come visits need to be supervised? Cant you just turn up and see him whenever you want?

17

Low Day For Me Today

by pale.emperor in

hi guys.

it's been about 4 or 5 weeks since i was disfellowshipped.

so far it's been easy, i enjoyed being left alone, no one bothering me, no one telling me i need to do more, need to reach out, questioning why i didnt go on the ministry, and the fact that my ex-wifes family cant talk to me even if they wanted to.

pale.emperor

Hi guys. It's been about 4 or 5 weeks since i was disfellowshipped. So far it's been easy, i enjoyed being left alone, no one bothering me, no one telling me i need to do more, need to reach out, questioning why i didnt go on the ministry, and the fact that my ex-wifes family cant talk to me even if they wanted to. It was easy, until today.

I dont know why, but today has hit me pretty hard. Yesterday i took my little girl out for the day. She's 2yo and loves the merry go round horses and kiddie cards on a track. So i took her. We had a really nice day. Later in the evening i passed her to her mum (my ex-wife, still 100% dub). Things were amicable.

Today is Sunday, i went to the meeting (i intend to get reinstated so my siblings will talk to me again). In the meetings i try to sit a row or two near my daughter and she sits with me for half of the meeting and her mother for the other half. I'd had her for the first half already. During the WT study she was crying. She was sat 2 rows behind with her mum and my ex's parents. She was crying for about 2 mins and i wondered why no one was seeing to her. So i got up, went into their row, and there she was on the floor face down crying. So i picked her up and carried her out into the back room. My ex rushed after me - along with her parents. In the back room i was comforting my daughter when my wife snatched her off me again, and her dad shaking his head at me and walked out again. As she was being carried away she was crying "daddy! daddy" and reaching for me. My ex took her into the baby change room with her mother.

I waited outside the baby change door with my arms folded watching the WT speaker. My ex's father (he's an elder) was crouching down in the hall whispering to another elder. The elder turned and looked at me. I looked at him back. Then back to the speaker.

My ex came out of the baby change and we had a small argument - she beleived i was undermining her by taking our daughter from the row. That the entire congregation saw me do it and what does that look like? That our daughter is probably playing us off eachother etc. I explained that i could hear her crying for a good while and i cant stand her being upset so i was only seeing to her. I didnt know what was going on and why she wasnt picking her up and cuddling her.

After the meeting we talked and things are amicable again. But when i got home i had a sad realisation...

If i were to slip and bang my head and die right now, or if i were to accidentally electrocute myself - no one would even know. I have no friends yet. My family dont talk to me. My non witness family, i dont know who/where they are because they were "bad association" and cut off since i was born. In fact, if i were to die right now in my apartment, it would be about a month and a half before anyone would call to my house to see if im ok. If i dont go to the kingdom hall they'd just assume i dont want to go.

This social isolation is really hitting me hard. I keep reminding myself that it's cult control tactic, and it's working. Hell, i'd joing any crack-pot group just to have someone to talk to.

10

A conversation with my ultra dub relative

by joe134cd in

here's a conversation i just had with my relative a few minutes ago i'll let you decide.. relative : would you like to read your grandfather the days txt (she passes joe the phone).

joe : sure.

(then proceed to read it to my grandfather and explain it).. after discussing the points joe says to relative.. hey what's the story arnt they printing books any more.. relative : no they arnt necessary any more.. joe : really why is that.. relative : it's all on line.

pale.emperor

I remember an official announcement saying we were not to read from tablets. The talk then went on about how the word of God is our sword and the bible should be in your hands and we don't want to get out of practice using the actual book or not able to find where the passages are in the bible.

Then a year later it was personal choice.

Now it's considered odd if you don't use a tablet. I mean, "come on brother, don't you know that book/magazine you're using cost Bethel money to print and ship?!!"

41

They Don't Have A Secret Elder's Book

by pale.emperor in

"they don't have a secret elder's book" so said my mother.

"all of our publications are open to everyone.

we all have the same information and nothing is hidden in this religion.".

pale.emperor

I think CT Russell genuinely believed the crap he was spouting - a lot of religions popped up around that time with similar ideas. By the time Rutherford got his dirty hands on it (by dirty, underhanded means i might add) he went to work turning it into a fully fledged cult.

I'd love to see a film about him. Drunk as a skunk giving a talk about Babylon then getting off the platform for a roll around with his 16yo "dietician".

7

What the Org Teaches #5 "God's" Law on Shunning is Flexible For Elders!

by The Searcher in

parents are forced by the org to regard their disfellowshipped children as if they were dead, non-existent - even if their child was in dire straits.

's feel when they hear that it's ok for elders to try and encourage disfellowshipped ones back to the org, but they can't?.

what the org says: km 8/02 p. 4 par.

pale.emperor

Cant wait till they try and visit me in a years time. I'm saving up all my negative energy to tell them to fuck off.

21

Letter To My Mother

by pale.emperor in

seeing as im being shunned by my family and friends.

i've decided to turn the tables and shun them back - but using the same methodology and reasoning they use on me.

i've written the following letter:.

pale.emperor

Thanks guys. I'll make a few amendments before sending.

I tried to reach out to my sister on last time. Informing her very nicely that she cant be disfellowshipped for speaking to me. Unless she talks about "the truth" or she openly disagrees with the reason i was disfellowshipped. She replied with "But i saw some videos at the convention where it was very clear that you are under satans control, and we were warned that disfellowshipped ones will try to tempt and trick us. I'm sorry, but im not going to fall for that. Come back and we can be a family again".

Then her husband called me quite angrily demanding that i never contact her again.

Worst convention ever? I think so. Whatever they watched has made them militant.

28

Jehovah loves "even rounded numbers" or could this be a way to disprove the inspiration of the Bible?

by notjustyet in

while i am not able to recall them all at this time, i remember so many instances that when a number was quoted in the bible, especially large numbers, they were all "rounded up" to the nearest hundred or thousand.

for instance the angel killed 185,000 syrians, not 184,879. sampson killed a thousand men with the jawbone of an ass, not 961. and on and on on the even rounded numbers.

i would guess that it could be agues that these numbers were correct but is that realistic?

pale.emperor

Ohhhhhh i see whats coming here... some new ~~shite~~ light in an upcoming convention that 144,000 is a round number and we actually mean a million. So there's still some new GB members queuing up to take over when we die.

Also, 1914 - sorry, that again was an approximation... we meant 2014. Yes, this generation will by no means pass away until the conclusion of this system of things.

19

Help Me Regain Contact With My Still In Family

by pale.emperor in

situation is, i'll never return to the wt.

my family with never leave the wt.. depending on who you ask you'll get the following answers when you ask about me:.

my family: he's confused.

pale.emperor

Hey pale... maybe its a culture thing but why are you asking your mother if you can go to her house? It will be a cold day in hell before I am not allowed in the house I grew up in.

My mum has complete trust in the WT mags and has never questioned them. Even when you mention old teachings she claims that they were never taught. She's that indoctrinated.

I saw her today actually, my little 2yo girl was asking if she could visit her so i made arrangements to go to the house to drop her off. My mum text me refusing to let me even in her street. I had to meet her in a train station and pass her to her. Not a single word was said to me. It's very strange. I have to collect her from the same spot later after work. It was as if i was invisible. My daughter was showered with attention though as if i wasnt there. As her little hand was waving me goodbye my mum took her hand and quickly put it behind her back and took her away.

All because i left the organization.

After that treatment i've written her a letter (see my other post), she wont be seeing her again.

22

If Apostates Were Allowed To Stay In The Congregations...

by JW_Rogue in

my wife was playing the "stay loyal" convention that she taped the other day and i noticed the brother said something that wasn't in the outline.

during one of the talks friday on shunning he said "can you imagine if apostates were allowed to stay in the congregations?

the congregations would be a garbage heap instead of the spiritual paradise they are now.

pale.emperor

There's that old saying by elders "The truth comes out eventually. You can't sin in secret". It's interesting because from studying human beliefs and psychology there's a notion that if you believe something, you begin to act in accordance with it. I.e. if you believe you're going to get found out, you do. Because subconsciously you begin to give yourself away.

That's why pathological liars can pass lie detector tests. They believe they're telling the truth. If you believe you're going to get found out you will.

21

Letter To My Mother

by pale.emperor in

seeing as im being shunned by my family and friends.

i've decided to turn the tables and shun them back - but using the same methodology and reasoning they use on me.

i've written the following letter:.

pale.emperor

Seeing as im being shunned by my family and friends. I've decided to turn the tables and shun them back - but using the same methodology and reasoning they use on me. I've written the following letter:

Dear mum
This will be the last time you hear from me. Since being disfellowshipped I’ve taken the advice of elders and Watchtower publications and studied the bible to draw close to Jehovah. I now know that I am close to Jehovah. More so than I’ve ever been. However, from my studies it is clear to me that we must stick to Gods word rather than mans.
It’s very clear to me that the love you have for me is conditional on the basis that I am one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. But be assured that the love I have for you in unconditional. That won’t change. But at the same time my love is wasted because you are commanded to hate me (Watchtower 1961 Jul 15 p.420).
Please be assured that I worship Jehovah. I approach him through his son Jesus Christ and study His word the bible daily. Jesus words take precedence over what any man or organization tells me, I hope you can understand that. (Matthew 5:44)
As such I will no longer try to contact you, and will no longer allow <my daughter> to see you. Nor any other children I may have. <my daughter> asks about you a lot and she likes to see photo’s of you and <my step-brother> (there’s one in her room that she kisses). But to save her the emotional burden I have removed any photos of you. And when she asks I have started to tell her that you’re not allowed to see us anymore.
I understand you do this because you think it’s what God wants. And if that’s you’re sincere believe I’ll respect that. But it’s my sincere belief that shunning to the extent that the WT society demands is unscriptural.
Please also read Watchtower 1977 Jun 1 p.347 in which you’re also admonished not to attend my funeral if I die. I may as well tell you now that I’ve had two cancer scares in the past 3 years. The last one being only 3 months ago (<my ex-wife> will confirm that if you ask her) when I had to get a full medical. At the moment they don’t think I have prostate cancer but I do believe I will have it one day seeing as my dad and grandad did.
I thank you for raising me and looking after me as a child and in a way I’m glad that growing up I didn’t have a mother-son relationship with you like my brothers and sisters had. Otherwise it would have made me cutting off contact with you a lot harder. As I raise <my daughter> alone I will show her unconditional love despite what beliefs she has, despite what she does and even if she doesn’t love me back. I cant help but love her, and would gladly die in Armageddon than shun her. I hope you understand that.
This hasn’t been an easy letter to write. Please understand that I follow Gods word, not mans. And I question any organization that claims to be God’s that would use emotional blackmail to this extent.
Your son
<Pale.Emperor> x

Not nice when it's done back is it? Not nice when someone uses emotions as leverage. Maybe she'll know what it's like every day for me for the rest of my life.