1. Dropping or otherwise radically changing the 607BC/1914AD doctrine.
have done several times from "oops we forgot there's no zero year" to most recent new understanding of a generation or "oops all those people are passed away"
2. Dropping or otherwise radically changing the 1935 date of the "sealing" of the anointed.
nahh- there's always the earthly hope
3. Allowing blood transfusions as a "conscience mattter".
according to what they tell the media or in reality?
4. Dropping or otherwise radically changing the entire "anointed"/144,000/partaking doctrine.
nahh- they'll just be a whole lot of wine and unleavened bread passed around that no one will ever eat or drink. Perhaps in the future just a photograph of a glass of wine and a plate of bread could be passed to avoid waste!
5. Allowing non-anointed to serve on the governing body.
no but the governing body will probably speak from the spirit world to specially appointed "other sheep".
6. Dropping or otherwise radically making more liberal the disfellowship/shunning doctrine.
nahh - you can't run a good cult without this stuff
7. Allowing some interfaith activities as a "conscience matter".
No way! Get out of that dirty whore my people!
8. Starting some real charitable programs.
What for?
9. Eliminating field service reporting.
But then how would we know if we put in enough hours to earn our free gift of salvation?
10. Provide their own Internet service or browser software so that they can filter information to the rank and file.
That would only encourage more people to use the evil Internet!
11. Have at least five consecutive years of decreasing worldwide membership counts.
Not as long as there are still 60 minutes in each hour for a sucker to be born.
12. Start their own offical college/university with a serious attempt at accreditation.
No its better to keep 'em uneducated and stupid.
13. Stop the open publication of detailed statisitics.
There'll always be a way to make the stats look good.
14. Hire out surplus printing capacity to other organizations.
Maybe they could also print Catholic Digest
15. Starting their own radio station or network.
been there done that
16. Starting their own cable TV program or channel.
Or streaming video content on their website via Realplayer
17. Starting their own direct mail advertising/soliciting program.
its called the Watchtower and Awake!
18. Starting their own telemarketing advertising/soliciting program.
* http://detnews.com/1999/religion/9908/05/08050165.htm
19. Publish a successor to the _Proclaimers_ book with a complete history presented in chronological order and told with candor and honesty.
Candor and honesty? Don't you remember who we're talking about?
20. Drop or otherwise radically change the doctrine that all other religions are run by Satan.
Again: That filthy harlot is going down! Get out!
21. Start passing a collection plate at meetings.
Yeah they can switch off with the guys who carry the mikes.
22. Membership drop to half (three million) of the current count.
That's still more than 144,000
23. Make available nearly all literature in electronic format.
nahh.. we don't want them apostates to be sharing it on that gosh darn Internet.
24. Formal supported organization of youth activities (dances, camping trips, sports, etc).
Who do you think we are? The YMCA?
25. Allow military service as a "conscience matter."
Only if you shoot members of that disgusting vile prostitute, Babylon the Great!
26. Allow flag salute or standing up for a national anthem as a "conscience matter."
If you can forge a voting card, why not? We'll just be secretly sitting down and not saluting in our minds. That'll show 'em!
27. Elimination of nearly all judical activity.
Who would keep a stranglehold on the flock then?
28. Cooperation with third party "do not call" registries.
That's part of man's law that ours supercedes!
29. Dropping secret files at the congregation level.
How will we be able to remember 10 years from now that brother Johnson had that problem with masturbation?
30. Dropping secret files at the branch level.
We'll burn 'em if they are ever subpoenaed!