Hi Kagloo and WELCOME!
I can understand your feeling of disloyalty. Believe me many of us have been there. You are coming to a point where I believe many 'thinking' witnesses come to at one point in their lives. The difference is that you seem to want to do something about it.
I once believed that change was possible within the organization. I felt that by being a better elder that change would come, that somehow I could make a difference. I was mistaken. It is corrupt from the top down. It is like MegaDude said that those running the Society do not have any integrity.
You have come to a crossroads in your life. You will be faced with many changes. Take them slow and be patient. May I reccommend reading Ray Franz's book's 'Crisis of Conscience' and 'In Search of Christian Freedom' if you have not read them already. Especially 'In Search of...' will really open your eyes to the organizaiton and everything you might have thought to be 'Truth'.
Good luck and please come back. There are many here who are willing to help you on your quest.
Salud