Apart from the fact my JW neighbour has just heard the BBC radio 4 programme on JWs and abuse, no other JW I've spoken to has a clue. In fact they say, the organization is 'very hot' on dealing with child abuse. So, no, from my point of view it isn't getting heard and here no one has heard about the ARC or anything.
Phoebe
JoinedPosts by Phoebe
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Effectiveness of exposing child abuse
by Tallon inthought i would try and gauge your views on the effectiveness of current child abuse exposure within the jw's.. i am aware of the arc investigation into historical and current child abuse, the uk charity commission investigation, and the excellent work of trey bundy.. however, how effective has the above been in exposing child abuse?.
would not an investigation in the manner of spotlight, be more effective in exposing it to a wider audience?
to prove that the abuse is 'systemic'?.
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BBC Radio 4 feature on J.W child Abuse
by Isambard Crater inon the radio this morning.
here is the link:.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b08njt79.
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Phoebe
My neighbour, who is a JW, came to the door and told me he'd just listened to the radio 4 programme and he was shocked. He didn't realise it was so bad -- and he used to be an elder -- he said no wonder they are always short of money. Some Jws are starting to think...
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Do you feel that you are really YOU?
by UnshackleTheChains ini am interested in finding out how you view yourself.
are really you when it comes to every day interactions....ie when at work, with family or friends, or if attending meetings?.
if still attending, do you feel you are not the real you at meetings?
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Phoebe
When I attend meetings (and right now I'm staying away) I am not me. I never have been me at the hall. I used to think there was something wrong with me because I couldn't be like other brothers and sisters. Talking the truth lingo never came naturally to me so I became a facade and I hated myself for it. I could never, ever be myself at the meetings and I thought I felt that way because I wasn't what Jehovah wanted and it was only a matter of time before he got rid of me.I was always a fish out of water at the meetings (I've been baptised 50 years)
But now through my counseling session I'm learning to be me. Not at the hall. But just in life. I'm enjoying learning to be me without feeling guilty all the time. I've found out that 'me' isn't so bad after all. People (in the world) actually do like me.
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Today's W.T on GB not being inspired is having ZERO impact on most J.W's
by Isambard Crater inthe congregation i attend had it's watchtower study on thursday night because of l.d.c work this week-end, and another congregation i have some not very spiritual friends in had their watchtower study on wednesday.
from what i have delicately prised out of people, the congregations loved the watchtower study this week, saying it was so encouraging and all the usual stuff, with no-one seeming to realise the g.b.
said they're not inspired, so the spirit int he past has moved them to teach wrong things, and all the other ideas excellently summed up on reddit.. today's watchtower will wash over the heads of most j.w's like it never even happened, the all remaining as loyal as ever, and it makes me so, so sad..
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Phoebe
tor15
When I asked why are they building Warwick etc they said 'they are building it for after Armageddon'
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Was it just me or was something different about the memorial last night?
by kpop inthis was the first memorial that i declined to do any work for the memorial.
i was assigned as a parking attendant after getting downgraded from doing the sound and had no intention of doing either task but i had to attend for my family and continuation of my fade.
i sat there last night listening to the talk and couldn't help but shake my head as my brain attempted to process the bs.
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Phoebe
They never mentioned any figures at all at mine, but we did get a story about how in America, George Wilson in 1829, a convicted bank robber on death row, refused his formal pardon by President Andrew Jackson and how they couldn't figure out what to do and took it to the supreme court.
I thought that was quite interesting.
Apart from that pretty much everyone scuttled home after as fast as they could. Mostly because it was so late and kids were tired. That's my 64th Memorial. I'm pretty much done with it all now but I thought I'd go to the memorial.
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Getting older, losing loved ones
by Gorbatchov injust reading a posting about relive a day for one year of your live... .
getting older, i am so sad thinking about years ago and missing my family members.
am i the only one believing they would never die?.
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Phoebe
I feel your sadness Gorbatchov, my parents firmly believed they would live to see the new system but my mother died in 1988 and my dad in 1994. I'm getting up to their age now and even my psychologist talks about me being in my final years!
I'm just sad that every one of my years has been dominated by 'the truth' I don't miss my mum, she brought us into this, my dad was opposed but came into eventually and then left when he was quite old. I wish he was here to talk to. When he kept saying the truth was wrong, I wouldn't listen. I wish I could have him back. Enjoy every moment of your family, here's wishing your parents will go on for a long, long time yet. X
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I finally get why people like to shun.
by poopie init finally hit me today.
why do religions enjoy shunning.
because many people feel like being close to god makes them special however just being special is not enough for many religious people that shun they must feel extra special how?
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Phoebe
At out last C.O visit he said (about ignoring DF people) ' don't you go thinking there's a way round this, a loop hole, you think it's okay to text or email. It's not. You shouldn't do any of those things.'
Today someone told me, we're not ignoring the person to bring them back, we're ignoring them so they don't corrupt us.
One of my best friends is DF. She lives near me. It breaks my heart not to talk to her. Today she rang me and for the first time in years we had a chat. I told her I'm not ignoring her anymore. It's wrong. But she said if they catch you, they'll DF you. So let's talk in secret.'
It's become like Orwell's 1984.
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Just an update on me
by Phoebe inhi everyone, i came on here a few weeks ago and told my story and you were so kind, caring and welcoming.
your messages of support moved me to tears.
i was so grateful.
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Phoebe
Thank you so much everyone. You have no idea how much your kind words mean to me. I'm taking to heart your words of comfort and advice. Isn't it ironic that I get no support from the 'brothers' and yet on here, in a cyber world where I don't know any of you, I am comforted and helped. That really is a sign to me to finally leave my life as a JW behind me. Yesterday was a turning point. I couldn't stay in that meeting a minute longer,I had to go.
notlaone - your experience has really helped me. Thank you so much.
James Jack - it was too long ago. I've lived with it so long and it's truly damaged me and it was through therapy I decided to seek closure on it.
dubstepped I knew the elders had their hands tied, so to speak, but I thought if I appealed to my abuser and asked for an apology - that was all I wanted from him - then maybe I could finally put it behind me. But that's not happening and my elders don't seem to believe me now, anyway. As for any spiritual care? Nope, nothing from them.
Giordano - Thank you for translation link - definitely using it. When I said to my friend if this is God's organization why is he allowing all this abuse to carry on? She said Jehovah allows things to happen, we have to wait on him!
So to all of you lovely people, from the bottom of my heart - thank you. I hit rock bottom yesterday and you picked me up.
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Just an update on me
by Phoebe inhi everyone, i came on here a few weeks ago and told my story and you were so kind, caring and welcoming.
your messages of support moved me to tears.
i was so grateful.
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Phoebe
Hi everyone, I came on here a few weeks ago and told my story and you were so kind, caring and welcoming. Your messages of support moved me to tears. I was so grateful.
Well, to briefly recap, my husband left the 'truth' years ago, my kids too, so there was just me and I've struggled on alone. It all came to a head last summer when I was diagnosed with undischarged post traumatic stress. This comes from a horrendously unhappy childhood when I saw much violence and from being sexually abused on two occasions. And yes we were the 'perfect witness family' to everyone that knew us. Anyway, I've given my entire life to this religion (50 years baptized) I've been a pioneer - everything. So with my therapy I decided to approach the person that abused me and ask for an apology (He is a so called 'fine standing elder') I told elders in my congregation and, at first, they were all for going after him but I needed to be in control so I said I'd write a letter. He didn't reply. Of course. Why would he? I sent it twice. No reply.
The elders in my congregation continued to be supportive. They kept saying we're in your corner. We'll support you blah blah.
But, oh how they have changed!
Last week one of the elders came to my house and said: 'of course we STILL believe you, I mean why would anyone make that up? But if he denies it well, what can you do? Life isn't fair sometimes. You'll just have to put up with it and wait for the new system.'
So, clearly my abuser and his network of elder buddies has got to my elders and probably called me a crazy person telling lies.
My husband was so angry with them for the flippant way they spoke to me.
So today, I went to the meeting. I still go because they hassle me if I don't and because I have friends there, but my heart isn't in it anymore.
We stood up to sing the song about God appointing men who are faithful and true and the Wt is about putting our trust in them and I just lost it. I totally lost it. I burst into tears, picked up my bag, coat and books and ran out of the hall. An elderly brother (not an elders) said 'are you okay?' and I mumbled something and just ran out of that place and cried all the way home.
How could I sit and listen to how wonderful the elders were when my abuser was singing the same song in another congregation getting away with it? How could I hear how loving they are when I hear of dozen of cases of how badly elders treat people?
I walked home and I prayed. I told Jehovah I love him, I love Jesus. I want to serve him still but I cannot do this anymore. I'm done.
Thank you for listening. I needed to share it with someone and it helps to write it down.
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"Best life ever" ?????
by charity7 inis this a slogan that was recently come up with for jw's?
i've seen it used as a hashtag on instagram for jw's, key chains, cakes, about me biography description... the first thing i thought was, isn't that a little pretentious?
they complain so much about this life.
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Phoebe
Best life ever is hash tagged all over instagram by JWs. I agree with nowwhat? the witnesses I know that are happy are the ones with beautiful homes, holidays, good jobs etc. For them, they have a great life with a huge circle of friends. But for those like me and my husband, who gave up the possibility of financial security to 'clean for a living' so we could pioneer...we now have nothing and no one cares that we gave up everything. and depression is rampant for those like us. I hate my parents for bringing me into this. I had no education to speak of, I was blackmailed into baptism (you're going to die if you don't) and look at me now, my entire life has been ruled and ruined by JWs. What a waste. Best live ever??I don't think so.