Posts by BluePill2

162

True Stories from the Tower - Part 1 "From Anointed to Pedophile to Bethelite"

by BluePill2 in

before i dive into the actual write-up of this experience, let me put some things straight.. i have thought long and hard if i should write more about my experiences during the 10+ years at different branches.

during these years i worked from financial department, service department, home office and different it assignments.

as you can imagine one sees and hears and reads a lot of stuff going through different stations in different countries.

BluePill2

villagegirl: May peace be with you, that is all I have to say to your words. Oh, and also the words one wise man said a long time ago (Matthew 7:3-5).

To all the others:

I might or might not write a book, because right now I don't think it would be of any value. Writing on this board, with a specific purpose in mind is another thing.

And Yes, I have been in close contact with Mr. Flipper and Andersons, both offering me support beyond what you can imagine. Barbara knows my real identity and counts with my full support for her ongoing, very valuable work in this fight against evil.

I will continue to write here, no matter what some of you might think about me as a person, or my motives, as that is also something that I have left behind: Worrying too much about what others think about me - one of the shackles in the chain that holds millions of people imprisoned in cults like the Jehovah's Witnesses!

stillin: I once read that mistakes from the past cast shadows into the present and the only way to make that shadow disappear is to cast light on it. I wish I had been "a hero" in this account and would have had the courage and strength to act in a different manner. That is not the case and I have come to terms with my past. I am trying to cast light on things that should not stay in the dark. I hope you understand that.

162

True Stories from the Tower - Part 1 "From Anointed to Pedophile to Bethelite"

by BluePill2 in

before i dive into the actual write-up of this experience, let me put some things straight.. i have thought long and hard if i should write more about my experiences during the 10+ years at different branches.

during these years i worked from financial department, service department, home office and different it assignments.

as you can imagine one sees and hears and reads a lot of stuff going through different stations in different countries.

BluePill2

Scott77:I will eventually. Started writing the other day and then it becomes stomach turning and I leave it there. Maybe you don't understand that besides the victims other people get affected by this mess as well. Maybe you do. It's as it is.

162

True Stories from the Tower - Part 1 "From Anointed to Pedophile to Bethelite"

by BluePill2 in

before i dive into the actual write-up of this experience, let me put some things straight.. i have thought long and hard if i should write more about my experiences during the 10+ years at different branches.

during these years i worked from financial department, service department, home office and different it assignments.

as you can imagine one sees and hears and reads a lot of stuff going through different stations in different countries.

BluePill2

villagegirl: I understand your rage. It made me furious too. But you are thinking like a typical American. You apply your "perfect western" system to the rest of the world. Just believe me that outside of the US there is another whole, crazy world out there that does not work like you are describing. You have absolutely no idea of what you are talking here.

Yes, I am guilty of watching and doing nothing to protect these children. I am not negating that. Yes, it's called guilt and conscience pain. I am not denying it and not feeling sorry for myself. But everything else, you have no idea. This is not some nice suburb back in Washington DC!

Lawyers, Police,....I could tell you some accounts of other people that went down that road and it never ended well, much less for the victims. There is something else that I will tell here on this board, but I need time and the right mental state to write it up.

I am not writing to entertain you, to redeem me or to save the victims (what is done is done, it can't be changed) but to warn and leave a written account of what has and IS, no doubt, happening right now! Also to keep as many people as possible away from this destructive American sect. Also to help others to get out or to become whistleblowers - they can be better man/woman than I was. Never too late. If someone at Bethel reads this - right here, right now - and believe me: THEY ARE, than they will see what it does to you if you see such things and DO NOTHING!

You will never forgive yourself. Never. I can't forgive myself.

72

I am on the edge of a freak out ..... I think???

by DATA-DOG in

jw
friends

so the rc really sucked, but i made it through.

the propaganda was mind blowing.

i don't know if the crap will be available on the official website or not, but hopefully it gets leaked somehow.

BluePill2

HAD to post again, Yadda Yadda 2 this was Golden! Perfect definition for the Watchtower creep cult:

Don't let this brainwashing, doomsday, money-grabbing and soul-sapping vampire cult get you down

72

I am on the edge of a freak out ..... I think???

by DATA-DOG in

jw
friends

so the rc really sucked, but i made it through.

the propaganda was mind blowing.

i don't know if the crap will be available on the official website or not, but hopefully it gets leaked somehow.

BluePill2

DATA-DOG: I always enjoy your postings here (you had many funny and clear crisp comments, so you are NOT insane). You remind me of myself. I was still at Bethel and screamed at god (saying the same thing - KILL ME NOW!) and also screamed at Satan. Neither one of them appeared or did anything. I also went throught the "wanting to blow my head off" - more than once.

Here is the point:

- Don't do anything stupid! You will be around looooong after leaving the WT (you will, believe me, you will). Your daughter needs you one day to tell it how it really was (like mine. I haven't seen my daughter for 3 years now, it is extremely hard and I wake up many times in tears and sweating, BUT it is bearable). Humans adapt to a lot of shit!

- Myself: avoided meds at all costs. It will cloud my mind and make me dependent. I enjoyed a lot to get a better grip on my mind. This website helped a lot (if you think something is "psycho-mumbo" or "spiritual-crap" than discard it - that is the beauty of being mentally out and starting to think critically): http://www.calmdownmind.com/

In a nutshell: Don't try to control your thoughts ("What you resist, will persist") - let them free flow and become an observer of your own mind (the anxiety levels really, really went down! Unbelievable, I never experienced these levels of mental peace as a JW), in due time you will experience a more balanced and very clear, focused mind. Very powerful stuff.

Big hug old friend. Hang in there. Stay tuned with us. We all have gone more or less through the same, you are normal and will get back to normal. Being in the cult drives us crazy (yes, conventions are the worst time of the year)

63

Being a JW Used to Be Fun :-)

by snowbird in

jw
friends

we found some people who were happy to welcome us into their homes, even offering us food and drink.. sometimes, they would flag us down and ask for the magazines, walk miles to the kh meetings, come to our defense if someone got ugly or rude.. now, jw's are either routinely ignored or outright vilified.. no one respects them anymore.. sad.. .

BluePill2

I grew up in Germany as a born-in and this was never fun. Especially for a kid.

Many of you have fond memories of past times (yes, the cult now sucks even more!) because you where young and had a sense of accomplishment (even if it was based on fake "facts") also many of you obviously had the good luck to be in congregations where the individual people themselves where fun or more on the human side. THAT made it nice, not the structure.

Also what I considered "fun" back then was only a way of coping with the fact of being in a cult. As a teen I had a blast knocking on so many doors and trying to get in (I am suuuuper curious) and try to find out as much as possible about the household. I visited and sat in the living room of: Hitlers Piano player (I studied with this old chap, he even wrote a Kingdom Song for us, died without ever becoming a JW), a fashion model (that used to appear a lot on German TV - man the pictures in her fantastic, luxurious apartment made me horny for hours after the study), a crazy Neo-Nazi (he did study with me and had all the parafernalia in his room - he said that he liked JW religion because it resembles a lot the Nazi ideology - pure race ideas, the perfect society and he often mentioned the way we keep woman "on the line" - he was a creepy asshole, but I was a pioneer and needed the hours!)

I could remember many more "interesting" persons here. One thing that I am actually thankful for is that it moved me to go to Central America and that lead to many very adventurous things that I would never have seen otherwise. Although this is relative as many of these things had nothing to do with WT (going scuba diving in the caribbean sea was one of the most marvelous things I did in my Life, also going up to an erupting volcano).

BUT. Big BUT:

I started lying from a very young age. I participated at Christmas parties at school, lying to my mother, stayed at home not to go to meetings - lying to my family (playing sick), had to "evade" being catched....for YEARS. Still today my girlfriend says that I have a "persecution complex" and have an uncanny ability to lie, just purely lie to people without becoming red faced. I feel ashamed for that and I also despise the twisted and fucked up mind that the WT created. It will take me many more years to get rid of their influence (if it is possible at all).

NOPE. What we considered fun is exactly the same "kind of fun" these folks are experiencing (and kidding themselves):

"YEEAAAAAAAHHHHH, we are soooooooooo happy - being a North Korean is the Best that happened to us!!!!!!!"

North Korea

37

New Tract for August 2014 - Scan

by BluesBrother in

jw
friends

if someone has done this before , i apologise but this was new to me.....struck me as strange that nowadays, the answers to life's problems are found on the internet .

.

BluePill2

Outlaw: Mate, I would love to see that chicken video. Actually I actually could see me baptizing again over a funny chicken video. But, nah, let's not kid ourselves, the Witness cult is not THAT funny and THAT smart...

This tract is a new low. People like my mother that joined the cult in the 70's and absolutely devoured books like Babylon the Great has fallen, etc. will be dismayed, but they are now old and weak and don't have the strength to leave and re-think their decisions. This is clearly dropping the old folks and trying to survive for the future.

They are in absolute, desperate survival mode!

Showing an iPhone and someone switching images is a pathetic and stupid attempt "to look cool". It's like that awkward nerd at school that wants to impress showing off some gadget.

They are neither a religion nor a cool, hip, internet-startup. They want to be both and are neither.

I am an atheist and don't want anything to do with ANY religion, but nowadays I have more respect towards Catholics than to Witnesses. At least they keep their tradition and stick to what they are.

26

In Death lies Glory

by BluePill2 in

i was alone at the new branch construction site in ticuantepe (nicaragua).

everybody had taken off for a weekend assembly in the capital and it was my turn to have watchman duty and guard the site.

we had dogs and i only had to walk around the perimeters and check all the gates and entrances.. suddenly a young boy appeared at the main gate, breathless and visibly nervous.

BluePill2

LoisLane: Thank you for your kind words. Actually I registered and started posting here around 2006 (under the pseudonym of "Trojan") but I lost the email associated to that account and the password to this site. In the meantime I had left Bethel and my assignment and a bumby ride started (that of fading and trying to save my family). That ended with me DA'ed myself and losing my family in the process. Here we are :-) having this conversation.

Yes, Witnesses have used funerals as infomercials. I have seen relatives and friends (non-JW) go out of the meeting place in a disgusted kind of way. They can see the sham, anybody else in the room can't. It's a different perception.

I attended once the funeral for a Branch Committee member and they made a complete show out of the "event", treating him like a rock star and shamesly using the "opportunity" to recruit as many as possible of the attendees.

That is also something that I absolutely hated, since I was a child, EVERYTHING. E V E R Y occasion is a "opportunity to witness". There is no normal social interaction or human feelings for others. Got invited for a non-witness wedding? Go to witness, to count time. Have a job interview? Recruit you Sucker! I had one elder telling me to witness during a job interview (that I desperately needed at the time!).

26

In Death lies Glory

by BluePill2 in

i was alone at the new branch construction site in ticuantepe (nicaragua).

everybody had taken off for a weekend assembly in the capital and it was my turn to have watchman duty and guard the site.

we had dogs and i only had to walk around the perimeters and check all the gates and entrances.. suddenly a young boy appeared at the main gate, breathless and visibly nervous.

BluePill2

Thank you all for your comments. It helps to give perspective. If this post helped only one person to gain another perspective, then it was worth it. I don't write often, it takes and for some reason drains me of all energy after I finished, but I write in one single instance (almost in trance :-) Some days I wake up and have the urge to put things into writing that have been floating around in my head. Some of these things are too painful and I sit down and don't have the strength or the focus to formulate them into words that have some actual meaning.

Thank you for reading this.

Some people have asked me about this. The young boy (son of Br. Perez) died of some mysterious virus. First they thought it was tropical dengue fever (after several recurrences it is possible to get a problem with the blood - it dilutes and therefore the person bleeds out). He completely bleed out and had a seizure with strong shakings, that is why everything in that room looked like it did. In the days and weeks after this incident the authorities sent specialists to that family's home to investigate and also to take blood samples from the other household members - without results.

Nobody else became sick afterwards, not even some of us that where in contact with the body. Very strange, but that's what it is. The family was very heart broken and yes, they clinged to the Belief that they will see their son again in Paradise, which again makes Witnesses treat even death in a strange way. Almost feeling guilty for crying and for their sense of loss (which is natural and should indicate that this is truly a loss - forever!), but they prefer to shut it down, gulp down the feeling because it shows a lack of faith in Jehovah.

I have seen Witnesses at funerals acting almost as if it where a normal day, goofing around and showing that they are "strong troopers" because they want to show that their faith in resurrection and the end times is so strong that they don't feel for the family or the deceased. How pathetic and sad they are!

26

In Death lies Glory

by BluePill2 in

i was alone at the new branch construction site in ticuantepe (nicaragua).

everybody had taken off for a weekend assembly in the capital and it was my turn to have watchman duty and guard the site.

we had dogs and i only had to walk around the perimeters and check all the gates and entrances.. suddenly a young boy appeared at the main gate, breathless and visibly nervous.

BluePill2

Thank you so much Aude Sapere! That was very kind of you. English is not my frist language and sometimes I hesitate to write more fearing that I would make too many grammar/spelling mistakes.

I absolutely understand what you are saying. Every day, every moment takes a new, fresh and clear meaning. This is also something the WT stole from us. The ability to enjoy the present moment! Always thinking about the future (that never comes) lets you miss the only real deal you have between your hands: RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW.

People think this is a contradiction (accepting death leads to appreciating life), but it is like one of these things that we have to wrap our mind around. A little bit like if you lose control over your car (or bike as in your case ) and the first - apparently logical thought - is to break, but instead you need to accelerate to gain momentum and therefore control again.

It goes against everything in your mind and yet it is the correct thing to do. Same here. EMBRACE Death and Life will make so much more sense. Crazy, I know.