truJW, I am so sorry you suffered the fury of willfully ingnorant "rank and file" members! The source comes from the elders and perps attempting to discredit your story. Yesterday I heard a story about a local brother who went insane, the rumors are wild about this new apostate! Modesto has a long histroy of some crazy messed up situations, my cousin was a "clean up man" to fix Modesto over a decade ago. You being persona-non-grata, that's only with the Pharisees, not with our Lord and Saviour, you did the right thing which is never cheap!
Jehovah's people are good at destroying themselves with self-doubts, feelings of worthlessness, self-loathing, why? with many words from the platforms, microphones and field service groups we hear garbage like, "those who leave are removed by the anglels" "Jehovah keeps throwing out the ones out and we keep dragging them back in!"
Our Organization has lost it's way, I believe members like "JehovahJirah", "Aguest" who think the Watchtower locomotive is going to be derailed in a large way, I know Jehovah will shine real light once the "great cleaning" takes place!