Sunnygal41

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Posts by Sunnygal41

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  43

  Going through a painful Divorce

  by caspian in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  just waiting for the final "decree absolute" to come through in the next 3 weeks or so.. but man why is it so hard, the final break.

  i really need this to be over so i can finally get on with the rest of my life.. .

  cas..feeling a little sorry for himself today.. feel free to offer any support or advice.

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  Sunnygal41

  Cas, I got divorced 4 years ago, and even tho I was the one who wanted it, I have to say it still hurts. I was married 20 years, and when you've spent that amount of time with someone, there are all kinds of attachments and memories that you don't even think about 'til you're not with the person anymore. Even tho I know that we are both in many many ways alot happier now, I still feel guilt and sadness. What everyone has said here has helped me too, and their advice is right on the money.

  "Been there, felt that"

  Terri
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  21

  JW marriages: happy/unhappy

  by starfish422 in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i've been wondering how many jws have gotten married too quickly, without knowing their prospective "mate" well enough, and have ended up really unhappy.

  it always seemed to me that a couple would be dating for, like, 6 or 9 months and get engaged, have a 9 month engagement and be married; often because they bought the "no sex before marriage" garbage.

  i'm sure that there *are* happy jw marriages out there; and certainly being unhappily married isn't the sole property of jws.

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  Sunnygal41

  Starfish, me and my former husband are two that bought into that "marry before you commit fornication" group. As you see, we are "former" marriage mates. I hate to sound cliche, and now, in my new spiritual awareness I know it's not cliche, it's part of the energy web. I had NO idea who I was, never mind who he was! Hindsight, being twenty-twenty, tells us that this would result most often, in lose/lose situation. Four years, plus from the Borg, I am doing very very well. I have an SO. We are more committed to each other and emotionally aware than I ever was with my former husband. That in itself, should prove, that the Borg has no clue as to what natural bodily reactions are, especially since they are a bunch of wizened, raisiny Old Men!

  Terri
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  34

  Moving on up ! (site stats & ranking)

  by Simon in

  1. forum
  2. announcements

  it's that time again when i bore you all silly with facts and figures !

  some directly about the forum itself: there have now been over 860,000 posts made in 57,000 topics with an additional 22,000 pms being sent !the topics have been viewed an incredible 18,000,000 times !!.

  how long till we get to the magical 1 million post mark?

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  Sunnygal41

  Valis, you bad thing! LOL! Not electric koolaid, but some gooooood weed and a fine Chardonnay.............a nice mix!

  Seriously tho, I am part of the "Those who have left the Borg" who has embraced a new spirituality................

  Terri aka Raven Wind
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  34

  Moving on up ! (site stats & ranking)

  by Simon in

  1. forum
  2. announcements

  it's that time again when i bore you all silly with facts and figures !

  some directly about the forum itself: there have now been over 860,000 posts made in 57,000 topics with an additional 22,000 pms being sent !the topics have been viewed an incredible 18,000,000 times !!.

  how long till we get to the magical 1 million post mark?

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  Sunnygal41

  So, despite some claims made to the contrary, we're certainly not dying or fading away - we're bigger and better than ever and "in your face WTS!".

  Yes! The old saw we all heard from acquaintances in the Borg, that the apostate groups formed NEVER last. They soon become divisive and argumentative and break up! CHEERS FOR THE JW DISCUSSION FORUM!!!

  Hooyah!!!

  Terri
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  34

  Moving on up ! (site stats & ranking)

  by Simon in

  1. forum
  2. announcements

  it's that time again when i bore you all silly with facts and figures !

  some directly about the forum itself: there have now been over 860,000 posts made in 57,000 topics with an additional 22,000 pms being sent !the topics have been viewed an incredible 18,000,000 times !!.

  how long till we get to the magical 1 million post mark?

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  Sunnygal41

  Simon, I know that at some level, this information is needed and enjoyable and encouraging. However, today, I connected to it at my former "Borg" level, and of course, the me that is now, was cynical and derisively laughing at the structure your post exhibted! Why? It was formatted very much like the old KM information on the Organization!!! Was this done on purpose or was it entirely subconscious?

  Terri

  P.S. I love the "Jehover" that the District Overbeer, Valis, posted. I had a study conductor who was from Washington State who always pronounced it "Jehover"
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  21

  Our Lost Histories

  by ashitaka in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  tonight the wife is out, and i had some time to think.. i was watching tv but got bored, because there is a fantastic thunderstorm going on right now.. i turned off everything, and started to think about things, ans why i've had a kind of empty feeling lately, as to my past.

  i think about the little things, the history of my life.. somewhere, i lost my life to the jws, that early time that is supposed to be the most important in forming who we become.. i remember being a child, but can't remember when i felt like a child, i just seem to be missing something.

  is it the birthdays, holidays, friends i was barred from having?

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  Sunnygal41

  When I left the JWs, I felt young again ... as though I were 20 years old still ... my theory, which I learned has some scientific support, is that when we leave an abusive situation we return to the age we were at when we first joined them ... sooo ... for a few years, I let myself be 20 again in the heart ... aftermore than 11 years away from the JWs ... I have finally grown from age 20 to 21 ... ...

  I recommend letting yourself be young again at some age level you wish ... maybe for an hour at a time ... go to the beach ... play games ... or do those things that bring nothing but pure joy ... explore, go hiking, etc. ... do some teenage things ... go to a party. While it cannot be quite the same as being 5 or 6 or 10 ... it can help the healing and finish the business of being human at a young age ... and we have the advantage of being old enough to know not to do the stupid foolish or illegal things ... so in some ways, we can be better at being young now than when we were young.

  I really really loved this, Amazing, cuz I did the same thing, and it felt soooo good.....I became the teenager I was when I became involved with the JW's and like Lady Lee, I smoked pot and cigars, wore short, short skirts, flaunted my sexuality, and slept around for awhile! LOL! I had always had an immense need to try things out, kick my heels up, have some fun.....part of me wondered all the time and felt sad at what I had missed! Now, because I allowed my teenager to get it out of her system, I am at peace inside! I don't feel the old restlessness that I used to feel. I have always felt that we need that time of sowing our wild oats, so we can look back and know in our hearts that we tried what we wanted to and made our decisions ourselves. It's part of owning our power, I guess.....even kids need to know that they are important, that they have rights.......

  Terri
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  21

  Our Lost Histories

  by ashitaka in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  tonight the wife is out, and i had some time to think.. i was watching tv but got bored, because there is a fantastic thunderstorm going on right now.. i turned off everything, and started to think about things, ans why i've had a kind of empty feeling lately, as to my past.

  i think about the little things, the history of my life.. somewhere, i lost my life to the jws, that early time that is supposed to be the most important in forming who we become.. i remember being a child, but can't remember when i felt like a child, i just seem to be missing something.

  is it the birthdays, holidays, friends i was barred from having?

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  Sunnygal41

  {{{{{{{{{ASH}}}}}}}}}

  Boy, did I feel your pain, my pain, and all of us X's! It does feel like we were robbed sometimes. But, having worked so hard to get out of my negative, glass half empty, obsessive/depressive thinking that being in the Dubs for so many years brought on, I can also be extremely, deeply grateful that I am now outside and cruisin' full speed ahead, gathering new memories and experiences.......not that I ever forget the WTS, none of us ever will, they, not "Babylon the Great" are full of the blood of innocents". Just to hear the echo of your inner child's sadness reminds me that they stole many young one's childhoods. You expressed it very poetically and wonderfully, too! Thanks for sharing it with us!

  Terri
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  61

  What does your online handle mean?

  by iiz2cool in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  a few of us use our real names as our handles, but most of us use something else, such as a nickname or a variation of our real name.

  iiz2cool - it was not my nickname (i really don't think i'm all that cool), but that of an old friend named mike prezelj.

  i won't go into how he got the name, but it happened when we were all very high, and you had to be there to understand.

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  Sunnygal41

  People used to say I was so sunny and cheerful and always smiling......and my ex used to call me sunshine, and another guy I was in love with called me sunny, and I'm a Leo, and the sun is my ruling planet......sooooooooo.....and 41 was how old I was when I asked my ex for my first screen name.....I'm almost 46 now, BTW

  Terri

  "my future's so brite, I gotta wear shades!"
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  4

  How to be Happy in a Sad World! Hilarious!

  by Sunnygal41 in

  1. social
  2. humour

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  http://www.palletmastersworkshop.com/happy.html

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  Sunnygal41

  Okay! Is there any way you can view it? I tried to copy and paste the first picture, but it's protected against that......it is so cute, too. It shows a zebra riding a rice rocket, and a lion trying to catch it! LOL! The other pictures are just as funny, but I especially liked that one! Whoever did the photo work did a great job, they used real animals and I couldn't see any distortion at all!

  I feel sad you can't enjoy it!
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  35

  ...Back from the Convention today.

  by ScoobySnax in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  ok so i braved the traffic in london all along the south circular to nw london to get to twickenham convention today.

  i must admit to getting a bit freaked when the traffic ground to a halt in central london, but eventually got to the stadium.

  well i only got to the sunday pm part of the programme, for the public discourse, "who are giving god glory today"....handled by a very able speaker.

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  Sunnygal41

  I have to add my agreement to the ones already posted......of course there is love, at some point....but, just as when a relationship goes bad, the joy and love turn to sadness and pain......I admit there were times when I felt happy to be in the group, but, eventually, I listened to the nagging feelings of something not being quite right, and I found out how wrong things really were. Once your eyes are truly opened to the lies and deception, you will stop feeling love. You will feel disillusion and anger, like so many of us who left...as incredibly hard and painful that was for us.....

  Terri