I remember my shock as a teen since I had a somewhat sheltered life and I thought all JW's were 'behaved', 'good', etc, according to JW standards. [...] Those who were probably genuinely in good standing were those who never left their house unless it was for field service aka no social life at all.
I suppose this describes me. I still find it difficult to believe that JW youths (or adults) are doing the stuff mentioned on this forum because I just never saw it. Then again, I didn't go to a lot of parties or have a lot of Witness friends.
I think this question is impossible to answer because what would bother some people's consciences doesn't bother others. As a believing Witness in good standing, I sometimes watched stuff that might be troublingly violent for some other Witnesses. Some elders might have had some strong words for me if they knew. But in fact I shared practically all that material with an elder who I was friends with, and he had no complaints. We just understood that our consciences were "stronger" and thus we didn't bring it up with anyone that we weren't sure about. So was I "genuinely in good standing"? As long as a stricter elder didn't know about my viewing habits, sure.