Posts by Teirce

5

JW's and Humor

by RR in

jw
friends

many onliners are already aware of the odd difference between jws and mormons in the area of humor.

while 78% of mormons have an active sense of humor, only 27.8% of jw have a responsive sense of humor.

there's been some research and testing at the esteemed clown college of los angeles, ca to determine if the jws simply have repressed,.

Humor, comedy, jokes, et al are juxtapositions of non-opposite dissimilars. Ie, not an oxymoronic doublethink, which Witnesses Have to learn how to do to remain Witnesses, but rather snapshots of irony, absurdity and impossibility. For a Witness to cultivate or be in possession of such qualities and distinguishing abilities runs them the risk of seeing the inherent contradictions in the WTS. In short, the ability to get any joke of developed wit makes it precariously easy to get the joke of the WTS itself. People who finally get this joke eventually stop being spun in circles by its ironies.

Someone said recently that John Cleese used to be a Witness, and it opened up new appreciation for his style and finesse in Python. Ministry of Silly Walks, my laughing ass!

2

Why are they STILL teaching this?!!

by nicolaou in

jw
friends

the first thing you read on the watchtower.org site is: "this is the authoritative web site about the beliefs, teachings, and activities of jehovah's witnesses.".

now, we all know the 1914/generation teaching was discarded six years ago!.

so why do we find the following on the official site?.

Teirce

Medical advances? But seriously, the gf's grandmother is 93 and just got her third divorce. She said she "just couldn't take that man any more". hehe. I'm sure there's still hope by some that the longevity-extending research being *contributed to civilization* by *hardworking scientists* will help them not have to backpeddle too much on 1914.

41

This Just Burns Me UP! [:(!]

by Aintthatcute in

jw
friends

i have read a great deal from the silentlamb's web site, not to mention other sites that are following this atrocity!

it would seem to me, and you can probibly bet, when something like this comes to the attention of the elders; that all of thier children are warned to stay clear of "publisher alleged child abuser"!

even though they are supposed to be "hush-hush" about it.

Teirce

Just a Q or 2 for YK.

You Know, mekeepsthinking that you fancy yourself as so outside the game, so comprehensive of grasp, so much a fly on the wall of Heaven, that you'd be in that sweetspot of moderate conservative-liberal power vaccuum when this ostensible crunch comes that shakes out lots of apples, thereby leaving you a natural shoe-in for certain positions. (That is, so long as your activity here is not disclosed.) How far off the mark am I? Don't give me no "If it is the will of Allah" tripe either. You're obviously too smart to be playing the game by their rules, and I won't accept the insult.

Incidentally, were you born into/raised as a JW?

6

Watchtower Study Sept 10-16

by dungbeetle in

make your advancement manifest.

ponder over these things; be absorbed in them, that your advancement may be manifest to all persons.

1 timothy 4:15. picture in your mind your favorite fruitxa peach, a pear, a mango, or something else.

Teirce

"The moment you get a piece of it into your mouth, you may let out a sigh. What succulence! What sweetness! What a jackass! It gives you a great deal of enjoyment and pleasure."

yup, what I thought all along..

1

Men in Black, FBI, or Elders?

by outcast in

jw
friends

i can't tell the difference,.

riad z. abdelkarim.

questioned by the fbi.

Teirce

At first glance, it would seem that Riad was the object of one of the countless false leads that the FBI has to persue, no matter how droll and odious the task. Evidently some well-meaning yahoo thought he knew something, and dutifully informed the authorities. The agents clearly didn't think that they were really onto a bona fide lead.

They were just calling at the clinic to kill time.. (*SECRET MANILLA FOLDER* lol)

17

Can You Get DF'd If You....

by Englishman in

jw
friends

have sex with a blow-up doll?.

englishman.. nostalgia isn't what it used to be....

Teirce

Altan sings a song that in gaelic has a verse that means 'jaw neath the sod'.

hehe

2

Something that is common to all of their rules

by ChuckD in

jw
friends

there have been a number of threads started here on the subject of the organizations seemingly arbitrary rules for daily life.

from moustaches to car choices, we all know that there are written or tacitly understood rules concerning almost everything.

i have noticed that there is a common element among many of these rules and wondered if anyone else noticed it as well.

Teirce

Those grey areas are carefully retained so that everyone, especially the powers that be, have some venue of demonstrating the superiority of their balancing act between Wise and Reasonable. (Which is the dichotomy/continuum of Spiritual-Physical.) Such postures are actually bids at imitating God's ability to be multiple dichotomies, in particular the Just-Merciful and Love-Hate. So, there are ideals we cling to, ie, "It is best to be wise, it is best to be spiritual, it is best to be just, it is best to be loving". But there are realities that we must deal with upon this mortal coil, so that "It is sometimes necessary to be reasonable, to be physical, to be merciful, to hate".

Any time there is a grey area, it is for the purpose of the practitioners of this craft of balance to impersonate God with his imperceptible, inscrutable, inconceivable gradients of finely (impossibly) incremented standards. Ie, they can be recognized and adulated for having a truly dizzying intellect, as it were a truly dizzying sense of conscience and freedom of speech, while not being required to give reasons. It this way they get to be god for a moment by giving arbitrary rulings and not being held accountable.

Even if Paul said a bit of wine was ok, the WTS could easily make it as unscriptural as they did for smoking which isnt mentioned, if they wanted to. It serves them, however, to maintain an edifice of genteel civility in at least a handful of things, lest too much black and white in simplicities betrayed their utter disregard for Actual, Real, Native conscience.

They desire a "Bible-trained conscience" in their rank-n-file, one that can be trusted to respond with stupefied awe to the inscrutable rulings of conscience by their superiors. Rank-n-swiss who question the motivation, standard, meaning or conditions behind the formulation of the local deity's particular ruling on the conscience matter do not have a "Bible-trained conscience".

1

"I Was a Christian Vampire"

by Stephanus in

jw
friends

thought you'd seen it all?

try this:.

http://www.christiangoth.com/vampires.html

Teirce

http://members.tripod.com/~Baron91/WorleyProtVamp.html

2

Is religion the cause of war?

by tdogg in

jw
friends

i have had this discussion with many people but i would like to know what the xjw has to say, since we were told this so many times at church.. i am of the opinion that most wars are not really fought due to religion but rather, economics.

religion of course is the excuse leaders will use, but if look behind the facade there is always some economic motovation.

Teirce

Wars are faught for political and economic resources, and cause religion, because the victor has written history since the first battles between equally superstitious primitive peoples. Since war causes religion, religion does not cause war. But religion is used to ignite the people to sustain the battle for political and economic resource. Without "divinity" religion, leaders would use secular nationalism to get the same effect. Wiping out religion will not wipe out war, because religion is not the cause of war. The WTS uses religion for control of political and economic resources, so does the Taliban, so did the Inquisition, so does the IRA, so does the PLO. Hitler used a secular substitute and look at the greater, more carnal, more nihilistic damage. Wiping out religion would leave nihilistic nationalism. Religions, left to their own devices, do not cause strife (they all have the same principle commandments), but are convenient fault lines for politics.

45

Staying awake during the Watchtower study

by drahcir yarrum in

jw
friends

here's a question i always wanted answered during the years i was a witness.

what's the best way to stay awake during the watchtower study?

oh, furthermore, what's the best way to stay awake during any witness "snooze-a-thon" brainwashing session?

Teirce

For some reason, I was able to sleep with my eyes open and stay awake-looking before I was married. Once I was married, she was too smart for that, so, I just ended up nodding off and embarrassing the hell out of her.

In my Greatest Man book, on the illustration for the chapter of Jesus' Transfiguration, I had a little power cord going from the illuminated Jesus to a wall socket. That's one thing that you can miss, all the chances to make fun of things from the inside..