Even after I left, I still had to cope with this delusional part of me that wanted to "show other people what to do" spiritually speaking. It's egotism in disguise! Some still don't even know they're doing it...
Hello, and thank you for sharing your post. I love what you posted. I know that many people join organized religions precisely because they see that as a way of having a position of leadership where they couldn't otherwise have anywhere else.
In my humble opinion, you may be giving a voice to a lot of current and former JWs. I grew up seeing so many men (mostly men) wanting to be "somebody" in the congregation simply to feed their own egos. In different ways many others have shared similar experiences and reasons for becoming JWs. It also explains what we see in some presentations, the pompous attitude and the self-serving behavior.
Once I heard a professional researcher in the matter of cults (high demand, controlling groups) mentioning that playing on people's egos is one of the most common ways in which people fall for those groups.
Also, if you notice, most people who become "born again", the very first display of their "born-again-ness" is precisely that attitude of authority and believing that they are leaders of the world.