I talkede to my grandmother this afternoon. She was baptized 33 years ago. She is very dear to me. And she is a kind woman. She knows I am gay, and she is the only one who as actually kept in touch with me in her own initiative and been at my apartment. She told me she would not shun me. My children and me were always welcome to visit her. And I should keep on calling her as I do. She is close to 87. She did state however, that her faith was very dear to her, and that she is looking forward to paradise restored. And felt very sad I had abandoned the faith we once had in common. But she loves me. She has put her heart ahead of blind faith and prejudice. But I have also respect for her way of life and desire to live the way she does. Respect goes two ways.
InquiryMan
JoinedPosts by InquiryMan
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51
My journey is reaching another level
by InquiryMan insome four years ago, i handed in my last report in the kh.
both wanted our children to have a more mainstream life than the witnesses frame could offer.
in time, my wife and i got separated.
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51
My journey is reaching another level
by InquiryMan insome four years ago, i handed in my last report in the kh.
both wanted our children to have a more mainstream life than the witnesses frame could offer.
in time, my wife and i got separated.
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InquiryMan
I wish you the best. A wise thing, if possible, is to plan your "departure" as you do. Make a network if possible, so you do stand alone when outside. Be prepared for up and downs. (I do not feel any resentment for them not visiting me the past four years. They did once, we had a nice, politie discussion, but I made it clear I would contact them if I wanted to come back. Having been an elder, I know all the procedures..... Being an elder, made me even more determind to leave.
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51
My journey is reaching another level
by InquiryMan insome four years ago, i handed in my last report in the kh.
both wanted our children to have a more mainstream life than the witnesses frame could offer.
in time, my wife and i got separated.
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InquiryMan
I wish you the best. A wise thing, if possible, is the plan your "departure" as you do. Make a network if possible, so you do stand alone when outside. Be prepared for up and downs. (I do not feel any resentment for them not visiting me the past four years. They did once, we had a nice, politie discussion, but I made it clear I would contact them if I wanted to come back. Having been an elder, I know all the procedures..... Being an elder, made me even more determind to leave.
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51
My journey is reaching another level
by InquiryMan insome four years ago, i handed in my last report in the kh.
both wanted our children to have a more mainstream life than the witnesses frame could offer.
in time, my wife and i got separated.
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InquiryMan
Thanks a lot once more for your kind support. They got the letter this afternoon and the announcement was actually made the same evening. My father told me they won`t even look after my children if needed, cause we have brought this situation on ourselves. We will be told, however, if something serious in the family happens, like death or disease.... How kind ;.-) It is an evil system. But I was prepared it was this way. I even shun my sister-in law for five years. But she has forgiven me and my wife for doing so.. I have no respect whatsoever for the organization cause it has ruined a lot of families. But I harbor no bitterness.
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51
My journey is reaching another level
by InquiryMan insome four years ago, i handed in my last report in the kh.
both wanted our children to have a more mainstream life than the witnesses frame could offer.
in time, my wife and i got separated.
-
-
InquiryMan
Thanks a lot once more for your kind support. They got the letter this afternoon and the announcement was actually made the same evening. My father told me they won`t even look after my children if needed, cause we have brought this situation on ourselves. We will be told, however, if something serious in the family happens, like death or disease.... How kind ;.-) It is an evil system. But I was prepared it was this way. I even shun my sister-in law for five years. But she has forgiven me and my wife for doing so.. I have no respect whatsoever for the organization cause it has ruined a lot of families. But I harbor no bitterness.
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51
My journey is reaching another level
by InquiryMan insome four years ago, i handed in my last report in the kh.
both wanted our children to have a more mainstream life than the witnesses frame could offer.
in time, my wife and i got separated.
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InquiryMan
When I got to the Kingdom Hall today, I just felt relief. I did not feel any bitterness and even have fond memories. Life is not black and white. Not having English as my native tongue, what I meant by "mainstream" was a way of life without the limits of the witness religion. My life is certainly not that of average Joe anymore - and that was not the intention either. I just want to be me. I am well aware of the ethymology and hidden codes of witness language. Of course I know that when I hear the word "world" it will always has another dimension to it than those with a non-witness background. But I know both worlds. As a sidenote: As a witness, I missed ceremonies in a way. In this respect, the witness tradition is poor to say the least. We started celebrating christmas right away, although I did feel uncomfortable the first time I went around the christmas tree singing carols. The feelings of the holiday is not in my spine in a way. However, celebrating birthdays, constitution day, christmas, voting etc feel very natural for me now. I`d given it thoughts before I departed.
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51
My journey is reaching another level
by InquiryMan insome four years ago, i handed in my last report in the kh.
both wanted our children to have a more mainstream life than the witnesses frame could offer.
in time, my wife and i got separated.
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InquiryMan
Thanks a lot for your input. It really made my day! Our kids are handling things nicely. They have met my boyfriend and also the boyfriend of my wife. They are confident and feel secure. It was tough though, to tell that I was gay to my teenage son. He reacted very maturely, stating that everybody has the right to live the life that is fulfilling to them. It made me feel very proud to have raised such a non-judgmental son! The smaller ones (aged 11 and 9), also reacted well. In fact the 11-year old said that: Wow, I´ll might end up having three dads. That was his initial reaction... My daughter has made drawings to both the new adult persons in their lives. So viewing everything, it seems that things have worked out well so far. And I am pretty confident things well be nice in the future too!
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51
My journey is reaching another level
by InquiryMan insome four years ago, i handed in my last report in the kh.
both wanted our children to have a more mainstream life than the witnesses frame could offer.
in time, my wife and i got separated.
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InquiryMan
Some four years ago, I handed in my last report in the KH. I had been serving as an elder for a decade, was baptized at 15. My wife and I left the witnesses at the same time, though for different reasons. She wanted a normal life, I left mostly for doctrinal/organizational reasons. Both wanted our children to have a more mainstream life than the Witnesses frame could offer. In time, my wife and I got separated. We will be divorced in a few weeks. However, we are the best of friends. The process of leaving the witnesses, in way paved way for me coming out of the closet as being gay. I did, however, never lead a double life and thus could face my family with a clean conscience, in order to use a witness phrase. Now, I have a boyfriend, who I love very much and he supports me. I also have fellow coworkers who are helpful, and actually some ex-witnesses and "Late Bloomer"-gays that are also supportive. So things will work out fine. My (ex)wife and I will hand in a dual "resignation" letter to the congo today, just stating that we want to inform them that we no loner acknowledge ourselves as members of the congregation. The reason: After four years of no activity whatsoever (no meetings etc) suddenly two elders came to the door of my ex-wife, wanting to know if it iwas true that she had christmas lights in the window... Reportedly some witnesses had seen it, and were disturbed. They stated they regarded us as brothers and sisters. (Oddly enoyugh, my immediate family and all other friends/acquaintances etc view it otherwise). In order to avoid further complications, I did contact the elder and had a calm respectful conversation with him making it clear that we did object to such interference in our private lives, although stated in very polite terms. Today,. five days later, I hand in our letter. Yesterday I told my parents and sisters that we did this. My sisters broke down in tears, but still making it clear they choose "Jehovah" and abide to the bible. And we all know what that implies: shunning. However, I do love them and want them all the best. My door is never closed. (((( HUGS )))))
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InquiryMan
I wrote you a pm. I am gay, and was an elder - see my pm.
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InquiryMan
I wrote you a pm. I am gay, and was an elder - see my pm.