Hi Mulan! I think it is great that you are so open minded and willing to explore explanations for your son's experience in life. People like you help others in similar situations to feel more comfortable and more willing to learn about their own children--so I commend you--and all of the other posters who have spoken up for our autistic friends and family!
I worked for 3 years in a therapeutic autism program, and I have seen children from both ends of the autism spectrum. Developmental disorders are always difficult to deal with, but Asperger's can be particularly challenging because people do not always recognize them as "different." While individuals with more severe cases of autism are recognized as having a condition, many people with Asperger's are just considered "weird" and not shown any sympathy for their struggle.
Fortunately, it sounds like your son has managed to overcome a number of the obstacles associated with this kind of condition. I wish you and your family the best, and hope that you continue to find consolation in this revelation.
I, too, am always available to offer you information on autism and related pervasive developmental disorders...but it looks like there are a lot of other ladies on the board who have more experience than I do! -Mothers do know best!-