Harmony,
I'm in a similar situation with my family. I know what you mean about that fear that one day they will do what they're supposed to do and start shunning you. I know the pain of doubting your family's love.
Keep in mind that for those who truly love you, this is almost as painful for them as it is for you. Sometimes I just want to shake some sense into my dad so he wouldn't have to keep on suffering. It's painful to think that our presence is causing tension in the family. Sometimes I think I should just leave them alone and they would be able to get over me.
Try to focus on the fact that you are the educated one. They are trapped. They are afraid to get out but you are there to reassure them. When they become ready, you'll be there for them. Usually we want the family to be our safe haven. The place we can go to feel comfortable and safe. In this case it has to be the other way around. You can rely on friends here online. They can never replace your family and they shouldn't. It's the JWs that teach that it has to be an either/or situation.
I enjoyed meeting you in Dallas because I now know that you are a special person. You have that extra dimension that makes it possible for someone who has just met you to LOVE you. I'm sure it's very easy for your family to love you. It's just hard for them to deal with the indoctrination that tells them you're bad.
If we could pick and choose our family........I would choose you as my sister. You have the kind of honesty and open affection that everyone dreams about in the perfect family. It's obvious in the little time that I spent with you that you are the reason your parents are willing to break the JW rules and hang out with you. I'm proud to know you.
TimB