Just take your time to figure things out, I suspect there are a lot more people who are still active in the org who feel the same way as you than what you think. There are many lovely people in the org, some who sincerely believe it all, others who have doubts but enjoy the social life and think that there might be a tiny chance that armagedon might come one day! You might find that you are able to keep going in order to keep family and friends, or you might just reach the point where you can't stand it any more and you'll leave, who knows. The main thing is that you have your own mind and you are able to exercise your own free will. Wishing you all the best, whatever you eventually decide to do :)
brainmelt
JoinedPosts by brainmelt
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21
I am what I am
by joe134cd ini was just thinking today.
i heard the term been frazed as a "neutral witness".
i think that's what best describes me.
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43
Husband has joined me in being inactive.
by Julia Orwell inthat's right, and it's great!
i don't know exactly why because he hasn't turned apostate and still seems to believe jw things.
i don't feel comfortable in asking him why he doesn't go to meetings anymore for some reason, or find out what he believes and if the things i've told him bout ttatt influenced his decision.
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brainmelt
Hey, that's great. Best just to let him figure out things himself, don't pressure him or question him, just let him do what he feels and make plans to do fun things at the weekend.
My husband seems to be doing similar to yours - still says he believes its the truth yet says that he doesn't know if God exists or not. He says that he plans to go to meetings on his own and will take the children on Sundays but he rarely ever goes, last Sunday was my last meeting and he hasn't been back since either, he never goes in field ministry and makes excuses to do something else and declined a shepherding visit last week. He is confused, poor soul but I do have good hopes that he will stop soon too because he doesn't have the motivation to continue on his own.
It makes it so much easier for you both that your families aren't in the 'truth' so they'll be a good support for you both :) x
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21
I will not die and unlived life
by jgnat ini will not die and unlived life.
i will not live in fear of falling or catching fire.
i choose to inhabit my days.. to allow my living to open me, make me less afraid, more accessible, to .
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brainmelt
Thanks for sharing, jgnat. I've never known how to just relax and enjoy THIS life. My whole life I've believed that there was a better life ahead and so have never been able to fully relax and just enjoy this beautiful world for what it is. I watch my children playing and I envy how they have no concept of time, they fully live in the moment. I want to learn from them and live each day fully and stop worrying about the future. At least I'm only 30 and I hopefully have many years ahead of me, I feel so sad for those who have given up everything, who refuse to pursue their dreams.
My father in law has so many things he wants to do but he just won't do any of them. He'll say, oh, i'd love to do such and such, or learn such and such or go somewhere, then he'll just say, I'll do it in the new system. :(
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30
What used to worry you the most about the great trib and Armageddon?
by Julia Orwell ini worried most about losing my dear family, but i also had silly worries like, what would happen to my pets?
say i didn't have a chance to let the cats out, they would starve inside my house.
and what if people were so starving because of the big gt famine and stole my chickens!
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brainmelt
Not making it. I've believed deep down for years that I wouldn't make it. I was always terrified of something happening to my children, them being tortured unless I renounced my faith. People I knew in the world that would try and kill me because I hadn't warned them about Armagedon. It's a relief not to live with this sort of terror any more.
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brainmelt
I stopped believing in God when I realised at almost the age of 30 that nothing is happening. I realised that god does nothing. He lets people suffer, he doesn't care. He let my mother in law die of cancer, he lets my mum suffer with cancer, they were/are two of the sweetest, good people who gave their all to him. He lets children die, he lets people starve and suffer through horrendous attrocities.
I am a parent and no matter how much someone had pissed me off, there's no way I'd just sit back and let my children suffer. How can you just sit up there and do nothing? Universal sovereignty makes no sense. If you've got all the power in the universe, you use it, you kill the enemy, you don't punish the children.
I realised that there is absolutely no evidence for a god, there is no need for a god, the only 'evidence' is because the Bible says so. Why the 2000 year silence? God is nothing more than a warm fuzzy feeling. If prayers are answered its just coincidence, wishful thinking or the power of suggestion.
I read up on evolution and discovered that it made perfect sense, I had been mislead my whole life on how it all actually works.
I find the whole process of evolution awe inspiring, it is truely amazing. If anything is worthy of my worship, its nature itself.
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28
What Kind of "Door Knocker" or "Bell Ringer" Were You?
by LoisLane looking for Superman ini preferred ringing the house holders door bell.
if i couldn't hear it.
i'd do it again, just in case.
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brainmelt
I knocked very, very quietly and hoped that no one would answer. I always hated it when I worked with with someone who was over zealous and would insist on ringing bells and knocking doors really loudly at 10am on a Saturday morning.
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99
Where else to go.I sticking up for the WTS.
by joe134cd innow i am going to do a rear thing here and i am going to stick up for the wts.
i realise that the wts hasn't got the best of track record, and sure they have made mistakes.
but if i was to go to another church wouldn't they still have the same issues.
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brainmelt
You can be a Christian and follow the teachings of Christ without attending any particular church. I've read a piece of advice on this forum several times and its good advice and that's just to take your time. You don't have to leave the WT and jump straight into another church. Just take your time to figure out what you believe, what your priorities are and go from there. Personally, I think there are problems in all churches/religions and I could never see myself joining another one, I want a long break from it all but we are all different. Just take your time, you'll figure it out.
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Woops, forgot about the "Special Talk"
by watson inactually forgot about it.
could someone post a link to the thread with the outline?
just in case my mother asks...
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brainmelt
Don't worry, you didn't miss anything. It really wasn't special, it was really boring, cold and depressing. The brother who gave it is normally a good speaker but he looked completely depressed himself. There were a few interested ones but the hall wasn't any more full than normal. A big let down - not that I expected anything different!
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40
Did reading Jwfacts help you? Please take a moment to say thanks..
by The Quiet One init seems as though so many of the stories of people who are now mentally free that i read on here involved reading jwfacts.com at some point along the way.. he basically saved my sanity (questionable, i know!
), and was never as sensational and garish as other sites which immediately scared me away.
why not take a minute out of your day to say thanks for any difference that jwfacts made to your life, and tell us what it was that helped you?...
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brainmelt
Such a great site, I came across it a few months back when I started my quest for truth - particularly I was trying to find a scriptural basis for the 'paradise earth' and came across your article on the very subject which articulated all the concerns I had beautifully. The blood transfusion article and the Noahs flood article have also been more helpful to me than you could ever imagine. I am really greatful for this site, its made me realise that my concerns were real and well founded and that I'm not crazy or spiritually weak. Thanks JWfacts!
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18
how do you cope with the stress of fading?
by brainmelt ini'm really struggling with it.
i've been learning the ttatt for the past 6 months now and i've been inadvertantly fading - either one of us or the children have had coughs/colds/flu/chicken pox/stress over the past 3 months which has meant we've missed a lot of meetings and field service with good reason.
we've only been out in service twice this year, so far no ones mentioned it to us but i'm waiting for our group overseer to bring it up anytime soon.
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brainmelt
Thank you all for your lovely comments, it really means so much to have all you lovely friends on here who understand what i'm going through. I am taking on board all your suggestions. I really need to try and take things slowly (difficult when you just want out asap) and to try and relax and breath. I had started doing yoga a few months ago but i've been feeling too stressed to even do that so I'll try again.
Billy: Armageddon isn't coming tomorrow with baby Jesus slicing you open if you leave the JWs or if you stay for the time being. And if anyone gives you a hard time about JW inactivity just tell them that you've been suffering from "surprise diarrhea" or "explosive flatulence" and the doctor has recommended that you stay away from crowds until you find medication that works. - this genuinely made me laugh out loud. If all fails and no one leaves me alone, I will have to use this one for sure
I've woken up this morning with a sore chest and I feel like i'm coming down with something yet again. My husband is the same, we are feeling completely run down. I know that for my own health now and my future health, I need to take a break and be kind to myself and husband needs to do the same. Stress isn't good for the body and I'm beginnning to fear how it could affect my health in the future.
I think some professional counselling is in order, I'm 30 years old and having to start all over and change my whole mind set. Its both terrifying and extremely exciting all at the same time.
Thank you all again for your lovely suggestions
Brainmelt x