I've lived through a version of this. Please do not overreact and look like a fanatic.
First of all, I don't need to tell you it was a mistake to write down incriminating things. You cannot undo a written statement. Let's not dwell on this aspect, as it is non-productive.
Secondly, what is your stake in remaining in "good standing"? Does a relationship with family and friends mean enough to you that you might be willing to be less than honest with the elders? Only you can answer this question and it differs for each person.
Lastly, if you decide you must avoid being disfellowshipped at all costs, you may need to play a few cards. It is not the most straightforward approach, but it may be the best course for you. Tell the elders you were experiencing a period of doubt, from which you have since recovered. Let them know you deeply regret the things you wrote and that you were only trying to explain to your closest relatives why you were spiritually weak. Be very clear that you did not intend to influence them in any way, nor did you want to sway others to your point of view. As politely as possible, express shock and dismay that your intimate expressions, intended to be shared only with your family, were passed on to outsiders.
If they press the issue, remind them that sharing confidential talk is not only condemned in scripture, it is illegal in some states. You may want to seek the advice of a local attorney as to whether laws have been broken.
You are obviously on thin ice and are exposed on some level. What you do from here on depends mostly on what you have to lose if your true feelings are known. For many of us, sacrafices of honesty are necessary in order to keep in touch with loved ones inside the Organization.
Best wishes,
Was
