congratulations!!
I wish you two the best.
WildTurkey
JoinedPosts by WildTurkey
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199
Otherwise Engaged...
by LittleToe injust a little breaking news:.
after several years of a great friendship with diane (previously posted as xena) things have started to really come together recently and i've succumbed to making an honest woman of her (or at least as honest as it's possible to make her.
last night (xmas day) i popped the question and she agreed to marry me (i wonder if she knows what she's let herself in for!!!)..
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THE GARDEN OF EDEN
by WildTurkey inthe garden of eden .
1. god created the world and two people named adam and eve, with whom he intended to populate the world.
3. adam and eve were imprisoned in the devil's garden called "eden.
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WildTurkey
THE GARDEN OF EDEN
1. God created the world and two people named Adam and Eve, with whom he intended to populate the world.
2. One day, while God was not looking, the Devil came and captured Adam and Eve.
3. Adam and Eve were imprisoned in the Devil's garden called "Eden." God spoke to his eternal foe and asked for the return of his people. But the Devil, being fond of his new pets, refused.
4. God resolved to liberate Adam and Eve. Taking the shape of a serpent, God sneaked into the Devil's garden.
5. Sensing that Eve was the more insightful of the pair, God approached her.
6. God said to Eve, "If you will listen to me, I know a way for you to escape your imprisonment."
7. Eve said, "But Mr. Serpent, I do not wish to escape Eden. I like it here. This garden has everything I need."
8. God said, "You do not know what you are missing. Outside of this garden is an entire world, much larger than a mere garden. This world was created for your use. You will be much more satisfied there."
9. Eve said, "Really? I need to discuss this with Adam."
10. God said, "No, don't do that! Listen to me. In the far part of the garden there is a tree, called the Tree of Knowledge. Eat from this tree, and trick Adam into doing the same. Then you will know of the world at large, and your true mission in life."
11. And so Eve did as God asked. She and Adam ate from the Tree of Knowledge. They knew at once of the world outside and they were astonished to know how large and beautiful it was.
12. The Devil, sensing a disturbance, came into his garden to check on things. He was surprised to find that Adam and Eve had put on clothing and were building a boat out of fallen trees. He knew at once that they discovered the Tree of Knowledge.
13. The Devil was very cross. He spoke to Adam and Eve. "You think you are smart now! The world outside is not as grand as you think it is. In here - you are safe and taken care of. Out there - you must work and suffer."
14. Adam spoke. "We know of the world at large and our true potential. What you say may be true, but we do not want to live in a state of perpetual dependence. We are going to leave this garden and take our chances in the world."
15. Adam and Eve climbed into their boat and floated down river, exiting Eden.
16. The Devil began looking about his garden. By and by, he found a serpent that was not his own. The Devil spoke, "I see you now, God. I wish to confront you."
17. God resumed his natural shape. God and the Devil stood facing each other. God spoke. "Those people were my creation, and I intended to populate the world with them. You stole them from me and now I have stolen them back."
18. The Devil spoke. "You are clever God, but I am more clever still. Adam and Eve will populate the world, but once they have done this, I will find a way to turn their descendants into my servants."
19. God spoke. "You shall not succeed. I will place a part of myself inside of each new born child. This shall be called the "heart." The people of my world will never be separated from me - and they will never serve you."
20. "We shall see," said the Devil.
2. Adam and Eve parented many children and these children parented many more. By and by, the world became full of the progeny of Adam and Eve. God was pleased.
3. The Devil was not pleased. The success of his rival irritated him greatly. The Devil tried repeatedly to enslave the progeny of Adam and Eve but he was not successful.
4. Thwarting the Devil with every attempt was the heart, that part of God that existed inside of every person.
5. The Devil thought to himself, "It appears that the only way I can enslave these people is if I somehow convince them to stop following their own hearts. I must be crafty."
6. The Devil hatched a crooked plan. He took the form of a spirit and spoke to an impressionable man named Abraham.
7. "Listen to me, Abraham, for I am the Lord God," said the Devil. "All of humanity is born separate from me. But I have chosen your people to be my special people. I will teach you how to reunite yourselves with me." Abraham felt a rush of pride at having been chosen and he agreed to do the Devil's bidding.
8. For the following months and years the Devil instructed Abraham and his people. He taught them elaborate and absurd rituals. This the Devil knew, would keep their minds focused on external things and thus keep them from looking inside - where the heart dwelt.
9. The people of Abraham performed their rituals with great diligence. They believed that by performing rituals, they were uniting themselves with God. When in fact, they were separating themselves from God.
10. The Devil was pleased with his success. He searched the world and found other men like Abraham. Soon the world was rife with ritualism, and divided into hostile tribes.
1. God saw what the Devil was doing but he did not fret. For the heart, placed inside each person is not just the connection between God and humanity. The heart is also the source of inspiration and therefore creativity.
2. God knew that tribes who became ritualistic would also loose their ability to invent new things. These tribes would fall behind, and be conquered by other, more advanced tribes.
3. And so it came to pass that the Devil's primary weapon was ritualism and God's primary weapon was secularism. Some centuries, the Devil enjoyed the upper hand and some centuries God did.
4. The battle never did end. It goes on today much as it did in Abraham's time. The battle never will end either. It will go on and on, Ad Infinitum. -
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God And University
by WildTurkey ingod and university
why god never received tenure at any university...
1. he had only one major publication.
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WildTurkey
God And University
Why God never received tenure at any university... 1. He had only one major publication. 2. It was in Hebrew. 3. It had no references. 4. It wasn't published in a referred journal. 5. Some even doubt he wrote it himself. 6. It may be true that he created the world, but what has he done since then? 7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited. 8. The scientific community has had a hard time replicating his results.9. He never applied to the Ethics Board for permission to use human subjects.
10. When one experiment went awry he tried to cover it up by drowning the subjects.
11. When subjects didn't behave as predicted, he deleted them from the sample.
12. He rarely came to class, just told students to read the Book.
13. Some say he had his son teach the class.
14. He expelled his first two students for learning.
15. Although there were only ten requirements, most students failed his tests.
16. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountaintop.
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End Of The World Party
by WildTurkey inwho would like to join me for an end of the world party next year?
the date 06/06/06, we will call it the mark of the beast blow out.
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WildTurkey
Hey guys it is great to see y'all too. Eyebrow, we live in Shreveport.
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End Of The World Party
by WildTurkey inwho would like to join me for an end of the world party next year?
the date 06/06/06, we will call it the mark of the beast blow out.
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WildTurkey
I would love to party in Vegas, but our 666 party has to be in Louisiana, cause in june it is as hot as hell here.
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End Of The World Party
by WildTurkey inwho would like to join me for an end of the world party next year?
the date 06/06/06, we will call it the mark of the beast blow out.
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WildTurkey
Who would like to join me for an end of the world party next year? The date 06/06/06, we will call it the mark of the beast blow out.
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Hard to get over: No New System
by confusedjw ini have to tell you something.. i really find it hard getting over the idea of no new system and all that it meant to me.
to be with my children and their children forever in perfect health.. too many days it just leaves me empty.
i just wish i could shake it and enjoy life, but the idea that we just live for 70 years and die kills me.
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WildTurkey
Opps , forgot to log WildTurkey off.
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WildTurkey
Thanks FMZ, I had a good time with you and others in chat the other day.
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WildTurkey
Well I'm here in Denver but I miss Louisiana.
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Lyin Around
by Xena ini just got a pm from lyin that she is experiencing technical difficulties posting on the site and wanted everyone to know she is chomping at the bit to post all the juicy apostata-tales.
so heads up to the apostates that bribed simon to keep her underwraps for a bit!
xena.
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