Thanks FreePeace. I wrote it when I was first entering college. I was beginning to change myself and become who I am today, but I was also dealing with all the pain of my past that made me who I was at that time, messing with that too much, would destroy the person I was....This is one poem that I wrote that I feel speaks to me still today....Glad you enjoyed it...I may post some more orginal work later....
wonderwoman77
JoinedPosts by wonderwoman77
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some orginal work
by wonderwoman77 indecision.
my heart cries out in tender pain.
for an end to all the rain.. sorrow and grief is heard by all.
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some orginal work
by wonderwoman77 indecision.
my heart cries out in tender pain.
for an end to all the rain.. sorrow and grief is heard by all.
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wonderwoman77
Decision
My heart cries out in tender pain
For an end to all the rain.
Sorrow and grief is heard by all
The world is crumbling; it will fall.
Down on its knees, it will lay and bleed
Violence. Will it always be a need?I need to yell. I need to scream.
All my life can be is a fairy tale dream.
Shattered about in mass confusion
Making sense of it would only be futile.
Fixing the fragments would only blemish the beauty.I move on, trying to be stong
Cliniging to the fragments,
Making choices with no answers
What is right?
What is wrong?
I remain here hanging on?Stephanie
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experience???
by wonderwoman77 inhey all you out there.
all of us homosexuals, lesbian, gay, bisexual were getting bashed in the chat tonight.
what i was wondering?
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wonderwoman77
Hey mango...I agree with you I think women stress me out, but I think I can form better connections with women, but with guys, I like the whole sexual experience, and have more of a physical thing there. So I guess I am sort of opposite of you, although I do enjoy sex with a woman :)
Mommy...I had no idea, and I am sure it counted.
refiners...technically your experience does count, you are part of the percent of people.
Thanks all for your input....
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experience???
by wonderwoman77 inhey all you out there.
all of us homosexuals, lesbian, gay, bisexual were getting bashed in the chat tonight.
what i was wondering?
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wonderwoman77
Hey all you out there. All of us homosexuals, lesbian, gay, bisexual were getting bashed in the chat tonight. What I was wondering? How many of you out there have had any type of homosexual experience? From a kiss to full blown sex....I am just curious. Statstics say up to 35% of people have at least one in their lifetime....so be honest....
Stephanie
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Pioneer junk food
by joelbear inlisa's mention of junk food harkened me back to memories of sitting underneath the shade of a big oak tree outside the suwannee swiftee convenience store on north forrest street munching on:.
zingers, the raspberry kind with the coconut on them.. so fess up, what was yall's favorite pioneer junk food?.
joel
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wonderwoman77
Hmmm...Well I never reg pioneered, just an aux pioneer time to time. I loved a burger king shake with fries and there was the place that we always went to that had homemade potato chips and the best snicker cookies....they had great soup and sandwiches to. Yummie :D
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Are you stable? (Mentally, that is)
by ashitaka inok.....any response will do, but if you're going to post a funny one, please also type your real thoughts along with it.. as for me, i'm pretty wild, but stable.
i never mention or show my fears; especially if my wife is around.
i can't bear to make her nervous.. ashi
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wonderwoman77
Ash,
Well cognitive therapy is a talk therapy, it just helps you change the way you think and percieve yourself. It helps me stay off the roller coaster of emotions that I use to be on. It is really just basic counseling. I think very normal for someone at any age. :)
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Are you stable? (Mentally, that is)
by ashitaka inok.....any response will do, but if you're going to post a funny one, please also type your real thoughts along with it.. as for me, i'm pretty wild, but stable.
i never mention or show my fears; especially if my wife is around.
i can't bear to make her nervous.. ashi
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wonderwoman77
Well I have an actual diagnosis. I was diagnosised with cyclothymia. It is a lesser form of bipolar, that can be control by cognitive therapy. I use to be very unstable, but considering my mom has borderline personality disorder and my dad possible has bipolar I dealt with life well. I had a break down junior year in college. I decided to seek therapy. I have become very self-aware and I have accopmplished many personal goals in the last year. I am more stable now than I have been since I was 16 and I am now 24. I have been able to set boundaries for myself and others in my life. I have realized how I can be a better person. I realized I can only control myself and it does not work to control the world or people around you because you never can do that, you only have control over yourself and your reactions. I have also been able to realize i need to grieve the loss of a normal relationship with my mom because it will never be. I am still in that process and I am most unstable when it comes to her, because I really wanted a better relationship with her. I know this is really long...but that is my answer to you mental question :) Good post by the way....
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Speaking of Holes
by wonderwoman77 inwell i posted the post about holes in bottles when dealing with relationships.
well my mother must have known i was talking about her.
i have not talked to her since sept. 11, and that was becaue i called her because i was upset and really wanted family to be there, but she was just yelling at me for not stopping to see her the week before.
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wonderwoman77
Inquiry...thank you so much for understanding....I appreciated your post SO much....
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Speaking of Holes
by wonderwoman77 inwell i posted the post about holes in bottles when dealing with relationships.
well my mother must have known i was talking about her.
i have not talked to her since sept. 11, and that was becaue i called her because i was upset and really wanted family to be there, but she was just yelling at me for not stopping to see her the week before.
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wonderwoman77
I understand where you are coming from Inquiry. I wanted for the longest time to understand my mother. I tried talking to her. I went to counseling to deal with the past she put me through. I had to deal with my mom trying to commit suicide when I was 12, that is when I began to take care of her. She is alive because I was proactive in getting her to the hospital, etc. I tried to get my mother to go to counseling with me, so we could have a better relationship, but never would she go. She tells me the reason she stays with her abusive boyfriend is because he gives her an identity, something she says she lacks otherwise. I understand that, but I also understand that i cannot have a close relationship with someone that loves me one minute and hates me the next. It is too much for me. I love my mom, and when she needs me she knows I am here. I set up a code word for her, that if she is getting abused, she can call me and say that, and I will get help for her. I have done what I can. I cannot control her, only she can change and seek the help she needs. She had her moods successfully stabalized through medication, but stopped taking it. She says her boyfriend is enough good for her and does not need meds when with him. What a hunk of bull. I understand your feelings, and I love my mom and have always wanted a good relationship with her, but I cannot do all the work, I did for 11 years, and I cannot anymore, that is just how things stand. I have to protect myself and take care of me, because if I don't who will?
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Question for you all
by wonderwoman77 ini was wondering if anyone has ever felt like they were in a relationship where the person is an empty bottle with holes in the bottom, and you are constantly trying to fill them up?
i was listening to the song not the doctor by alanis and it triggered this in my brain.
i would love to know everyones thoughts and experiences on this..... steph
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wonderwoman77
Well thinkers wife, you got mostly what I am talking about. I was thinking of my mom when I wrote it because she has borderline personality disorder and is emotionally empty and relies on others to fill her. I was her emotionally support for 11 years. I have gotten out of that role, but everyonce and a while she comes back and I try not to give, because if I give too much, it is painful for me. I am sorry for your experiences.